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  • Machete gushing over all the insane features of his new watches, listing off numerous gadgets and applications contained in the tiny devices, before finally lamenting they can't tell time.
    Machete: That baby will do everything but tell you what time it is!
    Juni It doesn't tell time?
    Machete: Well, we put so much cool stuff in there, there was no more room for the clock!
  • When the head of the OSS is about to begin his speech, the president's daughter leaves the dance floor. The way the masses of bodyguards shuffle sideways with her in perfect sync is hilarious.
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  • When Romero asks for Juni's name:
    Romero: And you are...?
    Juni: Tired and hungry.
  • The film's climax; specifically, Gerti's The Starscream moment.
    Gerti: Just wait until mom hears you tried to take over the world again!
    Donnagon: No! Don't tell your mother!
  • Carmen and Juni falling for several hours.
    Carmen: How long have we been falling?
    Juni: (looks at watch) I don't know. My watch doesn't tell time.
    Carmen: Best guess.
    Juni: I'd say about three hours.
    Carmen: Feels like four.
  • The fight between Donnagon and Gregorio.
    Carmen: Kick his butt!
    Gary: Yeah, kick his butt!
    • Gregorio and Donnagon then literally kick each other in the butt.
      Gary: Not like that.
  • When Carmen is about to dance with Gary.
    Carmen: Just be glad my dad isn't here. He gets real psycho about this sort of thing.
    [cuts to Gregorio who has appeared out of nowhere and is giving Gary a Death Glare]
    • Gregorio later asks which dances Gary knows, the last one being waltz, which he pretends he knows.
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