Funny / Seven Kingdoms: The Princess Problem

Even in the midst of romance, international politics and backstabbery, there's always time for wacky antics.

• The game will occasionally add a witty comment in response to your choices.
  • When asked in the Player Personality Quiz how you impressed a likeable boy at thirteen, you can answer that you simply "charmed the pants off him".
    Narration: You know. Metaphorically.
• When dancing with Zarad on the first day of the summit, the most hilarious (and best, as it gives you insight, plus a boost to his respect and romantic feelings) option to respond to his outrageous flirting is to insult him.
  Narration: He compliments the color of your eyes, you compliment his ability to lie with a straight face, he compliments your dancing, you mention you wish you had worn iron shoes.
• While conversing with Clarmont, the conversation is interrupted by Jarrod cornering Penelope. The options for saving her include physically pulling her away, redirecting him to Avalie, or simply pulling his attention to yourself, but by far the funniest option is the Jiyel Scholar boring him to fleeing via a lengthy discussion of academic papers.
• Skaltic speech, full of Buffy Speak and comical syntax due to language barriers, is hilarious, making any interaction with Princess Anaele extra amusing. Notably, she refers to the delegates in general as a bunch of "poof poof froofies" and calls Jasper a "watchy-watchy-starey-starey shadow man".
• In your first batch of invitations, there's a letter from none other than Lord Blain, who very publicly fell in Hate at First Sight with you the previous evening. Your character reacts with confusion - until she opens it and finds a rather seething letter headed "To my incompetent rival."
  MC's Internal Monologue: ...well that explains it.
  • Then there's Jasper's deadpan commentary should you attempt to invite Blain to one of your events:
    Jasper: Lord Blain has refused your invitation. The words he used... are not appropriate to be repeated. Suffice to say, we should all be glad he's not coming.
• On Lisle's Week One event, getting into a tongue-in-cheek discussion with his Highness over the possibility of shared custody of Penelope.
  • Just a little before that, you note with some surprise that princesses frolicking in fields full of flowers is not just an invention of the bards, after all.
  • On the same outing, one of the ways you can deal with your fractious horse is to employ your social skills to give the animal a stern talking-to.
• After the incident between the delegates from Skalt and Wellin, you wonder aloud whether it's wise to give the Skaltic women access to sharp table utensils, making Jasper's mouth twitch into a smile. Jasper.
• Play your cards right, and it's possible to trigger all five of the secret romances in a single play-through - which means that on your way to your meeting with the Matchmaker, you can conceivably end up not being able to make it five feet down the hallway at a time without someone pulling you aside to confess their passions, very possibly culminating in Jasper himself stopping to offer a few restrained words of support after running this gauntlet.
  • Jasper's trials throughout this are really the best part. When your maid Ria comes running out to say a few words, he excuses himself personally, but he is then in short order commanded to leave by Jarrod, sent on a fool's errand by Gisette, and similarly distracted by Woodly, who gives his best shot at getting rid of him entirely. One can only imagine what is going through Jasper's head at each return and immediate banishment, particularly if he's waiting patiently to speak to you himself.
• If you invite your staff to one of your events as guests, people will take note of the breach of protocol and comment on it. Sayra, however, proves capable of holding her own, even against Princess Gisette:
  Gisette: You invited your... maid? Aren't you positively quaint, [MC].
  Sayra: Her taste in guests is questionable. At least we agree on that.
• The third time you spend time with your Love Interest in weeks four and five, MC gifts her betrothed an item her country trades. Generally heartwarming, but:
  • The Corval MC gifts a silver spoon coated in a substance that detects poison, to which said Love Interest may wonder if she expects them to be poisoned.
  • The Wellin MC admits she wanted to get them a puppy or a horse, but Jasper convinced her to wait until after the Summit.
  • Every MC feels silly gifting something from her country if she is engaged to a fellow countryman.
• Though the MC is offered a bribe to throw the trial early in Week 4, she doesn't get to decide if she accepts it until the night before the trial, meaning you've probably been investigating all week. If you take it, you get some rather dark Lampshade Hanging:
  Narration: Why put in any of that effort at all?
• The theatrical put on by the delegates in week five is one long exercise in everything that could possibly go awry doing just that in the most hilarious way possible. We only get to see the climax of the play in any detail, but that alone is a series of mishaps one after another - every time you start to think the crisis has passed and things are finally going smoothly, something else happens to send it off the rails again, from Jaslen forgetting her lines, Blain showing up early and getting hit in the face, to an intrusion by a rampaging chicken with the player character as the Only Sane Man struggling heroically to keep things even vaguely on script.
  • Choosing to work backstage gives you little to no chance to make things go well, so you sit in the wings, narrating all of the above, capped by this little gem:
  MC: At least the costumes and props/sets that you and your fellow delegates were responsible for were pretty good!