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Funny / Blade: Trinity

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  • Ryan Reynolds as Hannibal King.
    • Particularly any of his scenes with Parker Posey. "Her fangs are in her vagina!"
    • Parker stole the Crowning Moment right out from under Reynolds with "And how about everyone not saying the word "dick" anymore? It provokes my envy."
    • "What did the one Lesbian Vampire say to the other? See you in 28 days."
    • Don't forget King's time with Blade, Triple H, and H's vampire dog.
    Blade: How do you finance this operation?
    King: I date a lot of older men.

    King: (sees H's dog, which is a vampire Pomeranian) Oh, fuck me. (two big scary dogs join it) Oh, fuck me sideways. Nice doggies. (the dogs reveal reaper mouths and chase him)

    HHH: Hey dickface, have you seen my dog?
    King: (who just made the dog and the two others fall out a window after they tried to eat him) Have you tried the lobby?

    King: So Blade, if this works, and all the vampires go bye-bye, what's left for you? I don't really see you teaching karate at the local gym. (Blade looks annoyed and walks away) He hates me, doesn't he?
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  • When Blade is interrogating the police commissioner on the vampires' plans:
    Commissioner: I can't tell you, they'll kill me.
    Blade: Kill you? Motherfucker, I'll kill you! I'll just enjoy it better.
  • This banter between Drake and Blade:
    Drake: Blade, ready to die?
    Blade: I was born ready, motherfucker.
    Drake: "Motherfucker". I like that.
  • This one scene where Blade, Hannibal and Abigail are dangling a familiar off of a multi-story car park, when someone's cellphone goes off. Blade looks around to his teammates, then down at the guy he's dangling.
    Blade: Oh, it's you!
    • And then Blade takes the call for him, in the process getting the info he was after, and passes the phone back.
    Blade: It's for you.
    Familiar: Hello? (screams as Blade promptly drops him to his death)
  • When being interrogated:
    Dr. Edgar Vance: How about the president? You know who that is. Who's in the White House right now?
    Blade: An asshole.
    (This handily avoids dating the movie, since regardless of who's in office, someone will believe them to be an asshole).
  • Blade coochie-cooing at a baby… and the baby immediately crying.


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