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Funny / Blade II

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As a Moments subpage, all spoilers are unmarked as per policy. You Have Been Warned.

  • This timeless gem:
    Reinhardt: Hmm. Well, like my daddy said right before he killed my mom, "Want anything done right, you gotta do it yourself."
  • Rush, the minor vampire from the beginning of the movie. Blade lets him go and promises to "catch (him) later". He disappears until The Stinger, where he's entering a private room in a strip joint; the curtain pulls back to reveal Blade casually standing there. As Rush realizes how screwed he is, Blade says this:
    • This same vampire sees Blade in the House of Pain and freaks out.
  • Earlier in the movie, Blade and the Bloodpack are scouting a vampire nightclub. Reinhardt tries to discretely aim his gun at Blade... only to find out that Blade's aiming at him already. Cue Blade's immediate grin (and an annoyed Reinhardt mouthing "Fuck you" back at him).
  • One word: "Sissy!"
  • In a deleted scene, Whistler says to the rest of the team (out of Blade's earshot):
    Whistler: Never underestimate the power of the pussy, boys. One cunt hair off that thing can drag a freight train a mile uphill.
  • A short dialogue between Whistler and Chupa:
    Whistler: Better get you some sunscreen, Buttercup.
    Chupa: Listen, shit kicker. You're about one cunt hair away from hillbilly heaven.
    Whistler: I love it when you talk dirty.
  • When Blade is recruited by the Bloodpack, he laughs about the irony to Reinhardt's face and challenges him to kill him since that was their plan to begin with. When Reinhardt just stands there, Blade gives him motivation by twirling a silver stake in front of Reinhardt then slapping him across the face. Reinhardt still seethes quietly, so Blade quips that he must've not seen it, so he twirls the stake then slaps him with his other hand again.
  • The Explosive Leash that Blade pins to the back of Reinhardt's head gets a fair bit of mileage, too:
    • After Reinhardt shoulder-checks and threatens Whistler, Blade decides to arm the bomb just to remind him who's boss.
      Blade: Keep pushing, asshole.
    • In the sewers, Whistler tries to use his UV light to see his way around and nearly burns Reinhardt with it. After Reinhardt admonishes him, Whistler retorts, "Well, some of us can't see in the dark, ya fuckin' nipple head! What am I supposed to do?!" Bear in mind that Reinhardt is bald, and the bomb on the back of his head does make it look like a woman's breast, with the bomb as the nipple.
    • Then Scud reveals that he's The Mole and that the bomb is a dud, prompting the payoff:
      Scud: What do you think about that, man?
      Blade: Two things. One: I've been on to you, since they turned you. And two: it's not a dud. (arms bomb)
      Scud: Oh, great. (explodes)
  • After Blade blows up Scud:
    Whistler: (shocked) I was just starting to like him.
  • Blade's reaction to Whistler and Scud arguing is one of amusement. He just takes a step back and leaves them to it.