Stories you wrote as a kid

I remember having to write a Funny Animal story (a pet gains sentience), wherein I played the part of a Mad Scientist and my cat as the animal. I literally ended up Surrounded by Idiots because my workforce rebelled over the fact that the cat didn't pull a paycheque. Another one i had to write was about the class being captured by a witch, except she turned out to be a psychotic Rich Bitch who kidnapped people For the Evulz. In highschool, we had the assighnment to write a story from a sentence on the blackboard. I wrote an Intrepid Reporter story with Dirty Communists and Cold-Blooded Torture out of the sentence "I was trapped" and the fact that I didn't have a watch.

edited 22nd Oct '14 11:04:53 AM by dvorak

Stuff on my old not-Internet-connected laptop from third grade:

"The Club Penguin Show": A saga of stories revolving around penguins which were clear self-inserts (except for one female OC who my character had a crush on). Most of my stories were just random, though there was one story arc that I remember of: some evil princess that hosted a children's TV show and was using a charm to brainwash children.

"Dec0der": Oh god, more self-insert. I don't even remember this one that much, some secret club?

"Total Cartoon Island": A version of Total Drama starring characters from other cartoons that I liked. Sponge Bob, The Powerpuff Girls, and Flapjack are three I remember being in there off the back. Sadly it has been permanently lost to time, unless my nan printed the dozen or so episodes I had written before that computer fried - I can hardly believe some of my old garbage she's kept because "it was cute!"

When I was a kid, I wrote what I like to call The Snowflame of my writing history.

Essentially, its either stupid or awesome.

It involves a team of teenagers fighting against an evil doctor who is "invading the Earth" even though he lives on "Skull-Death-Face Island", which is purportedly on Earth. The first is named...sigh. Guy Extreme. Then we have Lance. And their female team mate, whose name changed every page.

Lance is stated to be "from a nation destroyed by Dr. Deathsatan". I never specify which.

So, the villains; the evil doctor was called "Doctor Deathsatan". His lieutenants include a Nazi Nobleman named Count Swastika with a giant "Iron Eagle-Bot" he fought the heroes' Humongous Combining Mecha in, and Duke Malicious, who...turned people into robot pirate zombies by tapping them on the forehead three times.

Dr. Deathsatan was stated to be from "The United States Government Science Department". I did not know at the time there was no such thing as the United States Science Department. Specifically, they gave him "many funds" and "giant robot pieces" that he then used after going rogue. Again - people trusted a guy named Doctor Deathsatan. Enough to give him a grant. And parts for giant robots the United States for some reason has laying around.

Things drag on for a while until Deathsatan reveals he can see the future. At which point he somehow gets the United States to surrender to him...because...he...saw something really bad, I guess. Truth was, I was probably feeling rebellious - so my heroes suddenly got to be rebels.

There's the hilarious "Nucular Canon" Swastika fires at the team's mecha, which they swat away. Duke Malicious somehow turned Mount Rushmore into the likeness of him, his boss and the Count. And the heroes liberate a neighborhood and are proclaimed "hero king do gooders".

After these events and a few others, I apparently lost interest.

There need to be more books like that in the world.

Wall of Text ahoy.

Well, I wrote a comic that was essentially Mario with an Author Avatar, simply titled 'Thomas'. It...wasn't half bad, actually. It was improvised as I was writing, and all my good stuff comes from that, so...yeah.

It began with the traditional princess rescue, but 'Dr.Kill'em' locks the door. Thomas phones his friend, Tom, to bring 'ice lilies' (this was made before these existed in Mario) to freeze the door to break it. It turns out he was wearing the same outfit as Thomas, which he then counters by saying it's a different colour.

Which is irrelevant, since the comic is monochrome.

Also, a magic paper cup was given from Tom to Thomas for Hammerspace

Essentially, Kill'em has knocked the princess unconscious, and proceeds to scream an evil laugh every panel. He orders one of his minions to attack them ('Ring-Guy'...Quad that was uncreative), who proceeds to go Attack of the 50-Foot Whatever on them by getting bigger. He is then set on fire and nearly lands on Kill'em.

Kill'em then takes out a gun. He fires five times, directly at Thomas. The bullets somehow miss him, grazing every part of the body that would make it seem close (armpit, crotch). Tom then uses an ice lily, completely disregarding any thermodynamics.

More monsters are ordered to attack, but are set on fire. Kill'em (whom of which has decided to change his name to 'Dr.Bwah' due to his constant Evil Laugh...oh man, I was lampshading stuff when I was seven...) is sent to jail, 'Princess Annabethia' is saved, Dr.Bwah breaks out, end of part one.

And then...it gets better. Seriously. It gets REALLY creative, (I think) so don't steal it!

Essentially, two cops have discovered that Bwah has escaped. They phone Thomas, who then tells Tom and Annabethia. They try thinking about what to do, but Thomas is knocked out, Annabethia has herruby earings ripped out and goes unconscious, Tom gets hit with a frying pan.

When they come to, they are in hospital beds, wondering what the heck happened. Alina, Annabethia's nurse (why did I pick Mary Sue -esque names?) says that they were knocked out by Bwah for an unknown purpose.

Bwah breaks in, then has Ring-Guy smash through the roof. Tom gets up, but sees that he has both a broken leg and arm. He runs over to Thomas - who's view of the events is blocked by a curtain - and takes his cup. He gets a 'bombless fuse', sets himself on fire, and hits Ring-Guy. This time, Ring-Guy lands square on Bwah, knocking them both out. Another creature comes in, essentially a coconut with wings for arms and arms for antennae, and drops 'explosive matches'. Thomas screams that he has no idea what's going on, so Annabethia fills him in.

They throw explosive matches at him, thus knocking him out. Bwah, Ring-Guy and 'Spiny-Fly' are sent to jail. For no reason other than to heal their injuries, a five month time skip occurs. Annabethia contemplates why Bwah stole her earings in the first place.

Conveniently enough, Bwah's incredibly vague plan comes to fruition at that exact moment, revealing he had inexplicably smuggled the earings into his cell. He then throws one at a guard, knocking him out, then uses the other to pick the lock.

Despite the fact Ring-Guy was in the cell with him.

Thomas is then phoned by the police to tell Alina to bring the ambulance. Thomas, Tom and Annabethia decide to go with her. When they stop at the station, Tom decides to make them stay in the ambulance to play 'guess the injury'. Below are quotes directly from the comic.

Tom: Hey Thomas, Annabethia, what do you think? Beat Panel Thomas: I don't know. A meteor...meteoroid...meteorite... Thomas: Which one is the kind that hit the earth? Tom: Meteorite! Thomas: ...Hit a cop. Beat Panel

Annabethia inexplicably guesses the exact sequence of events that occurred. This is slowly revealed to Tom as the policeman and the lock are brought outside, until everyone starts running away, when a giant foot appears behind Tom. He is kicked out the window.

Both the ambulance and Tom are picked up and thrown over top of a lake. Tom inexplicably flies in the ambulance through the window he broke. They begin sinking.

And then... there is a panel of Ring-Guy tied up, despite him being in the Police Department parking lot. This isn't another Plot Hole, however, as it turns out the rest of Team Bad is tied up, along with a thing that resembles one of those white star things you put under tiles. It breaks out, fires a Hadoken at their captor - a duplicate of Dr.Bwah - and sets Bwah, Ring-Guy and Spiny-Fly free.

Fake Bwah turns into a popcorn kernel that inexplicably has a cord attached to it. Fake Ring-Guy turns into something similar, as does a fake Spiny-Fly flying above the ambulance.

Thomas, Tom and Annabethia inexplicably find bombs floating in the water. They use these to propel the ambulance out of the water.

The white-star-tile-thing, Telepathia, (now that I think about it, it resembles Starfy on drugs) uses Telepathy to communicate with Bwah, Ring-Guy and Spiny-Fly. He has no idea what the 'Morphuses', the impersonators, wanted, but he knows they were working for his rival, Teledarkina. No joke, he says this:

Telepathia (telepathy): The Boss Morphus, Eye-Key, morphed that black guy. Dr.Bwah: Hey! Dr.Bwah: My name is Dr.Bwah! Telepathia: Whatever.

It would've later turned out Dr.Bwah wasn't black, just wearing a generic Darth Vader-y mask, but still, I can't believe I didn't see anything wrong with that.

Teledarkina shows up. Telepathia throws a Hadoken at him, while he does the same. Team Bad goes flying, inexplicably landing on the ambulance. Telepathia decides to just ram Teledarkina, knocking him unconscious. He starts cheering, but then the Morphuses show up, with a dragon on the way...

And it ended there. The next one would've centered around Tom getting a Romantic Interest. Despite the fact there was a strong new bad guy that had showed up. I could probably continue it while maintaining the same carefree tone. It was pretty funny, but looked less like swiss cheese and more like the moon. So many plot holes.

So...I apologize for stealing two hours of your life.

edited 2nd Nov '14 3:27:25 PM by Dimentiosome

Ironically, my oldest story is probably the one I've mostly recently started releasing on ff.net. Pretty significant changes since then, but still.

When I was a kid (mostly 5th-6th grade, approx. 2000-2001), I wrote a 200-page novel (on paper) that was a rather blatant copy of Digimon, with almost every character an Expy of characters from the first and second season Digidestined, complete with their own evolving monsters, also frequently expies.

Although I'm not proud of the story now, and I've since moved on to entirely different stories, as I matured my "original" characters became the springboard for my actual original characters, who now number over 400 in total (I have a lot of ideas). If you're familiar with the first season Digidestined, by scouring Seasons of Love, you might be able to figure out who was based on who, but just in case: Rick (Tai), Iris (Sora), Mike (Matt), Tom (Joe), Emily (Kari), Alex (Izzy), and Nathan (T.K.).

In eighth grade (2003), I also wrote a 5-page Shallow Parody of The Time Machine (which I'd never read or seen), calling it "The Tim Machine", about a guy named Tim Traveler and his friend Patrick "Pat" Events, with Tim traveling back in time to the age of dinosaurs, Ancient Egypt, and Medieval Europe, where Hilarity Ensues. Again, my writing has greatly improved since then, but it nevertheless remains my only (official, non-fanfiction) published story, having been published in The Anthology of Short Stories by Young Americans 2003.

edited 2nd Nov '14 9:48:08 PM by shrikecatcher

sudenly I wuz forward in tim!111

I think I was six or something when I wrote my first ever story, "The Red Starfish". It was about a red starfish who was bullied by all other starfish because they thought they were yellow and that only the red starfish was red. But then the red starfish talks to red diving goggles (I wished I was kidding) that tell it it's pretty and mentions that it doesn't make sense that all other starfish are making fun of him because they are actually all colourful. Because of that, all the starfish realize that what they thought was their reflection are actually the stars that are in the sky, and the starfish have all kinds of colours, and everyone's happy. The end.

I made one hwere the main character was a dinosaur with insane mary sue powers. It could do like anything any dinosaur could do. Then I realized there was no way for it not to eat the humans, so I killed it off in a really lame way.

IT WAS YOU THE WHOLE TIME?!

Once upon a time, I cried my little baby eyes out because I couldn't come up with anything to write. When my tear ducts finally withered shut, I settled for a three-sentence story about three bears who played with a ball in a field. Most of the page was filled up with a crayon drawing.

I'd say it's paradoxical that I have the opposite problem these days, but there are precedents. Teacher wants a five-page story? I'll give her twenty-three. It'll be cool — and feature anthropomorphic lizards taking a makeshift submarine to an underwater base to stop a mad tyrant's plan to turn everyone into disco dancers.

In hindsight, that makes more sense than what I've got now. A winner is me?

I had a self-inset story when I was sixteen or seventeen, where the character was transported to a fantasy realm where he (when I thought I was cis) turned out to be some savior of the world and his companions were the daughter of death, a living cloak and a few other random warriors (can't remember now though). The main villain was an Eldritch Abomination before I knew the concept of one and there was a story arc of the character being split into different aspects of himself. This was around the time where I was into really perverted anime porn, so that did play a role in the story.

edited 6th Nov '14 8:00:14 AM by DarkbloodCarnagefang

Actually, I've been faithfully keeping up a world in my head since I was seven years old. The idea is that there is a multiverse, and in this multiverse, every fictional story and character ever, including ones mentioned in this very thread, is real somewhere. The main conflict is that between the Multiversial Defense Force, lead by totally-not-me and consisting of all the heroes, and Sadland, lead by the evil trio Tenel Nenel (Emperor Palpatine wannabe who wants to rule the multiverse), Dametrea (evil witch, the kind who wears sexy black outfits and has a big staff) and General Veers (a lot of stuff is borrowed from Star Wars—here he is the right-hand man) and consisting of all the villains.

It started out pretty simple, as you might imagine, but over time it has gotten more and more convoluted, filled with political intrigue, pseudoscience for everything, enough subplots and retcons to confuse Square Enix, more characters than Once Upon A Time and enough wars to bankrupt any real country. I wrote something for it for my 2013 Na No Wri Mo, and it's so confusing that only I have seen it, as only I can make any sense of it. Still, I trudge on, and probably will trudge on until I finally run out of ideas and the whole thing collapses into a point mass. I've tried to outsource things a bit by making online roleplays based on it, but it's no use.

In any case, I like to think of it as an amazingly long series of movies, with the whole series being the Star Wars equivalent for whatever world watches them. It's basically my own child. I'm sure that when I do finally finish it with appropriate flair, I will write it all down, buy the rights to everything with my vast wealth and release it as a series of movies that will make George Lucas feel small. One can dream, anyway...

PS. This is the first time I've spilled the whole thing on the internet. Do I seem crazy?

edited 9th Nov '14 6:00:32 PM by TooManyIdeas

I'd be willing to check it out. Sounds less convoluted then mine.

Essentially, I wanted something complicated. Oh dear Quad...

So, these three kids break out of prison, stealing a 'dedigitizer'. In the process, one of them gets possessed by a bad guy. Except the bad guy is a good guy.

Except the kids are really clones of their captors, who were created when the Bigger Bad stole genetic material from one of the kids future selves in the present.

Except the Bigger Bad is really a Big Good attempting to create a Stable Timeloop to kill an angel.

Except the author had outlawed time travelers from exiting his dimension.

Except it was all a plot by 'the book of power' that had granted the author powers to kill the Big Good.

Except there are a bajamilgooquadbillion conflicting agendas. Loads And Loads Of Characters...

There ends up being a three way standoff between another author, the angel and one of his characters in an antimatter dimension. Angel needs to get character's gun because her BF is digitized on it. She also wants to kill the author, which will somehow get her the power of god because he's been killed by the author...Ghdjbnwa hgsijbakwfllnkjbkajigbfnajklnfgjkasengbqwheaitf23

It was a mess. One of the main problems was that I couldn't think of any good motivations, so it ended up being people manipulating others ad infinitum.

edited 9th Nov '14 7:06:21 PM by Dimentiosome

I think as I kid I wrote a whole bunch of story ideas but less full-fledged stories.

I once wrote a story about a girl who played baseball and had a giant canary as an imaginary friend. I also liked ripping off a whole bunch of ideas. Mainly fairy tales, books, and stuff I saw on TV. Once I attempted writing a story about a young teen "Men-in-Black-style" agent who had to fight off aliens. I also had this imaginary book series about two detective girls who would solve mysteries that mirrored famous novels (e.g. I had a Treasure-Island-style mystery set in a water park).

Oooh, and then there was my weird attempt in middle school to write a "feminist" Lord of the Rings...okay not really but the first story in the trilogy consisted of a girl going on a magical journey with a prince, a bunch of mythical creatures, and a talking unicorn to defeat a wicked witch, so for all intents and purposes it was Lord of the Rings.

But come to think of it, maybe that wasn't such a bad idea—if anything it helped teach me how to construct stories.

edited 1st Dec '14 12:48:48 PM by Coujagkin

My first attempt at writing was a horrible plagiarism of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. Like, I literally copied it word for word, changing only the names and actions of a few characters. I stopped doing that because I had some ideas of my own.

Most of my stories from back-when are ridiculously pornographic, too. Like, I wouldn't want to let anyone read them these days because I'm so embarrassed by them, lol. On the plus side, those stories taught me about overdoing things.

When I was 11 (back in 1999), I began writing a Fantasy Epic about an evil emperor trying to conquer the world. His name was Lord Johaness Eviler.

He was the protagonist and I kind of narrated how he tried to stop the heroes from defeating him.

I vaguely remember the world that story was set in had like a hundred or so fantasy races and they were all very different physically. I'm actually surprised that, to this day, I still remember what they were supposed to look like despite the fact that I never described them in the story itself (and I never drew any pictures either).

The weirdest thing is that that was the only story I wrote as a pantser and the only one I actually "finished". I transcribed it word by word last year and, if memory serves right, it was 380k words long.

I've thought about rescuing it and writing a proper book, but I can't really stand to read more than two paragraphs at a time. There's so many clichés and awful dialogue... it's just So Bad Its horrible .

edited 1st Dec '14 8:17:28 PM by Lorsty

My old stories usually ripped off the Guardians of Ga'Hoole books, sometimes word for word, and used mainly crocodiles as characters. I remember that there was one story that had an ending that ripped off The Legend of Spyro: Dawn of the Dragon nearly word for word, and apparently the main character became the leader of the crocodiles. Oh, and the grammar. I remember there being "ymouth" in there.

edited 2nd Dec '14 4:55:24 PM by 2D

@Nickthe Swing That was so terrible it looped right around to beautiful. Doctor Deathsatan.
I've always been something of a story teller, so I do have a few old stories. However, there's only one I still have, though I never wrote it down.
This was the central plot of a game called Color Code I created when I was little. Color Code was centered on a chain of tropical islands, kind of like Hawaii, populated by animals that had magic powers depending on their colors (hence the name). Though I've forgotten most of the plot, I know it was unofficially split into two chapters. The first centered on an electric Velociraptor named Echo trying to find his long-lost sister, Screech; it ended in a climactic battle between Echo and some giant water anacondas to protect her. I recall it being incredibly dramatic, at least in my mind.
The second chapter I've almost completely forgotten, and I only remember that Screech turned out to be evil and pushed Echo off a cliff. I've been meaning to try and revive and reboot the story.

edited 9th Dec '14 4:36:02 PM by RiverWhiteWolf