Quotes / Your Mom

The stranger had crossed a sacred line. He had mentioned the men's mothers. Nothing could get him out of a beating now, not even the fact that he was obviously a simpleton. Albeit a simpleton with good vocabulary.

"Test subject, I've been told that your mother—"... Mmm. Well, that's just disgusting.
GLaDOS, Portal 2, Peer Review DLC

"Dollar twenty five, Willie? Isn't that the same price your mother charges for a blowjob, you piece of dogshit?"
Bishop Nelson , Toll Booth Willie

"I don't go after other people's mothers, but my own was quite enough to attack."

A whore, your mother was. Sensed the Dark Side in her, I did.

Finally, an attempt at real discourse that operates from a core of cold reason and doesn’t rely upon ad hominem. He does resort to ad mominem, but who can resist.
Penny Arcade again, news post accompanying "On Perspective"

Sonic: Now to do things old-school. (spindashes) Spin nice knowing ya, Knux. Ha ha!
Knuckles: (catches Sonic) That was terrible!
Sonic: So is your mom!

Oh, yo mama fight!
Darth Vader, Robot Chicken

You want to play the dozens,
Well, the dozens is a game,
But the way I fucked your mother
Was a God damn shame.
George Carlin, in one of his earlier comedy albums.

BLU Scout: What are you, the president of his fan club?
BLU Spy: No, that would be your mother!

Matt: Ahaha! Yeah, you're a real combat specialist!
Pat: Your mom is a fucking combat specialist.

Your Mom has bad science.
Doyle Blackwell, The Secret Saturdays

Your mother sucks cocks in Hell!
Reagan, The Exorcist

Your mother is down here, Karras, with us. Would you like to leave a message? I'll make sure she gets it.
Reagan, The Exorcist

Something about... your maternal ancestor.
Evil!Hoshi translates for a Tholian captive in In a Mirror, Darkly

Y'know, I'm glad now your mother rejected all my advances, because at least I know you're not my son. There aren't many who can say that...
Emperor Doviculus, Brütal Legend

I'm going all in... just like I did with your momma last night! Turns out she's a really good Poker player.

<Colin> Am I the only one who doesn't find the "your mom" business funny, by the way?
<Colin> as a parody of poor insults it might have been funny
<Colin> three years ago
<Colin> but you have been doing it for literally years now :P
<Asimir> I've been doing your mom for literally years now

Detective Lowe: You're probably in a hurry to get home to your little lady or whatever you call her, huh? The night time is the right time for love and all that, right?
Detective Renee Montoya: That's what your mother tells me.

Draco: And there's a picture, Weasley! A picture of your parents outside their house — if you can call it a house. Your mother could do with losing a bit of weight, couldn't she?
Harry: (trying to hold Ron back) Get stuffed, Malfoy. Come on, Ron —
Draco: Oh yeah, you were staying with them this summer, weren't you Potter? So tell me, is his mother really that porky or is it just the picture?
Harry: You know your mother, Malfoy? The expression on her face — like she's got dung under her nose? Is she like that all the time or just because you were with her?
Draco: Don't you dare insult my mother, Potter.

Lucky: Your mothers had fleas! Your fathers were foxes!
Dagger: (Starting to get angry) You little-!
Lucky: You were born in spoil-boxes! You taste so bad, the fleas spit you out! Your mothers were tailless! You hear me, mange breeders? Your fathers licked sharpclaw spit!

Archie, the chair was old and rickety.
Old and rickety? You'd say a rotten thing like that about something that I hold dear? Do I ever say rotten things like that about the things that you hold dear? Did I ever call your mother old and rickety? Did I ever bust one of her legs?
But the springs was all loose.
So was your mother's.
And it was covered with beer stains.
So was your mother.
And the stuffin' was all comin' out.
You knew her better than me!

Greeley Elementary Principal: A twenty-minute song and dance number with forty seven "Yo momma so poor" jokes directed at Jacob Hallery, which ended in a finale with fireworks.
Alex Trebek: This is the sound a doggie makes.
Sean Connery: "Moo".
Alex Trebek: That is incorrect.
Sean Connery: Well that's the sound your mother made last night!
Alex Trebek: Aw, come on now, that was totally unnecessary! We would have accepted "bow wow" or "ruff".
Sean Connery: "Rough", eh? Just the way your mother likes it!

Sean Connery: What's the difference between you and a mallard with a cold?
Alex Trebek: What?
Sean Connery: One's a sick duck, and I forget the rest but your mother's a whore.

Sean Connery: Knock knock.
Alex Trebek: Who's there?
Sean Connery: Me. The guy who slept with your mother last night.
Celebrity Jeopardy, Saturday Night Live

Jimmy Carr: Who managed to set a new world record after spending 71 days crying in the B & Q? [Noel and Richard start laughing.] Richard and Noel! What have you put as the answer to this question?
Noel Fielding: Your mum.
Richard Ayoade: Was it your mum? No seriously, was it your mum?
Big Fat Quiz of the 00's

Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!

Bentley: Your mother was a broken down tub of junk with more gentlemen callers than the operator.
If you need to learn how to talk to a lady, ask your mum.

Fire Marshall Boone: Well, it's too bad we can't all be as awesome as New York's Finest which, by the way, sounds like my mom describing her laundry, which — oh, and she's dead, so let's tread lightly on the response.
Detective Peralta: That's not fair!

Poe: This is Commander Poe Dameron of the Republic Fleet, I have an urgent communique for General Hugs. [...] If you reach him, tell him Leia has an urgent message for him...about his mother.