Funny / Gamer Poop

  • Let's face it, a Funny Moments page is pretty much redundant because the entire series is pretty much Funny Moments.
  • The way that the word "these" is pronounced in the phrase, "Let's get to bashing butts as well as DEEZ nuts!" is a pretty popular gag.
  • The bard that launches into a hammy rant about how much he misses Imperial soaps and...MOIST TOWELETTES. He provides a demonstration as well.
  • You have to admire this particular exchange for its multifaceted humor and nested punchlines.
    A: May your mother's tongue be rough in my throat! May her dry vag loosen upon my lips.
    B: Brother, I'm not sure she would like that. Mother is far too proud a woman for that.
    A: I suppose you're right.
    B: Why don't you try sis?
    A: Brother, that's disgusting! That's our sister! And you know she tastes like aunt Agna.
  • Upon hearing there is a sechs tape of Liara and Ashley, Shepard does the most impressive double take ever by spinning his head 360 degrees!
  • Mark Meer speaking one of the lines.
  • Even the characters are expecting running gags:
    Ash: I hate my titties.
    Shepard: HEY. They're fine, Ash. They're SO damn fine. I think they're just stuck in those super-tight clothes.
    Ash: Shepard, I just-
    Shepard: Shh. [Puts a finger to her lips] We'll get them out of there safely, Ashley. Together. For Earth. I promise. [Starts to walk away]
    Ash: Shepard, wait...that's it?
    Shepard: Oh, right! We'll bang, okay?
  • From the GTAV video:
    Lamar: How am I gonna knock a bad bitch if I ain't got a penis?
    Franklin: WHAT?! *brakes sharply* Fuck, homie. Dat's sexy!
  • From Skyrim 10, Ysolda and Carlotta Valentia trade insults because the latter won't teach the former a spell for breast augmentation. After a few rounds, Carlotta taps her chin, hmms in thought, and calls Ysolda "Aquaman." Everyone in the area gasps dramatically in horror.
  • When giving Faith money in the The Wolf Among Us video, the "character reaction" box says, "You chose not to kill the prostitute to take back your money... like you always do in GTA."
  • The sheer amount of fan-submitted artwork of Jarl Balgruuf drawn like 'one of your fancy French girls'.
  • This exchange from the second Mass Effect episode:
    Shepard: The Reapers aren't the problem anymore. Kids are. Damn kids playing around with cocks.
    Liara: On the internet.
    Shepard: Damn truth. Can you control your damn children? ... There was a boy, back on earth. Couldn't have been more than six or seven. I watched him screwing Reapers. DEAD Reapers.
    Garrus: Damn whore.
    Shepard: As the Normandy escaped the attack. It's nothing I haven't seen before. I had to join them.
    Ashley: What the hell?
    Shepard: Nothing wrong with me, is there?
    Garrus: Damn whore.

  • Likewise:
    Shepard: Let's move before the Reapers realize what we're up to.
    Anderson: Negative. There can be no retreat! No retreat! No stepping back. No stepping forward. And no destroying Reaper forces.
    Shepard: But first sign of any trouble, f*ck 'em all!
    Anderson: DAMN IT! Negative! No defeating the Reapers! NO DEFEATING THE REAPERS! Innocent people die!
    Shepard: And if they don't?
    Anderson: SAY AGAIN?!
    Shepard: (silence)
    Anderson: Exactly.

  • From the L.A Noire poops: "This is America." "Let's change the subject." "This is Germany???"
  • "With Enough chems, You can turn up for days!"
  • From the same episode, the scene with a pregnant Sarah Lyons. The hilarity just keeps piling on in layers!
  • "But you stole a young child's plaything... and inserted it into your plaything." Made even funnier by the reveal of a Magneto action figure when the camera zooms out.
  • Liara neglects taking a shit before the mission. The line sounds so natural, you'd think Ali Hillis herself voiced it.
    Liara: NO!
    Shepard: What is it?
    Shepard: How bad?!
    Liara: BAD!

  • Dr. T'Soni is a closet fan of Transformers against Matriarch Benezia's wishes.
    Liara: I've studied Transformers my entire life. My mother hid them from me.
    Shepard: What? Seriously? Fuck your mother. I know I did.
    Shepard: 0_0
    Liara: It must have been such a joke to her when I became Optimus PRIME! *transforms*
    Shepard: Oh, quit showing off.

  • Wrex does not take it well when he learns that Garrus molested Shepard.
    Wrex: I found out Garrus had access to your ass and destroyed it.
    Shepard: Uh oh.
    Wrex: I don't understand you, Shepard. I think you enjoyed it.
    *Shepard glares at Garrus*.
    Wrex: Shepard?
    Shepard: Yeah?
    Wrex: I was wondering... [...] Maybe you could teach the females how to take it like a champ?
    Shepard: WHAT?
    Wrex: It's time to step up, Shepard.
    Shepard: I don't think—
    Garrus: He'll do whatever it takes.
    Shepard: Kill yourself.
    Garrus: Shepard...
    Shepard: No. You don't get to be angry about that. More importantly, p*ssy's my friend.
    * later*
    Shepard: Liara! We'll bang, okay?
    Liara: My body's ready.