Funny / Castlevania

  • The Aria of Sorrow version of Excalibur, The Sword Still in the Stone. Soma isn't The Chosen One, but he is strong enough to pick up the whole thing, stone and all, and whack enemies with it anyway.
  • In Castlevania: Portrait of Ruin, there is a cream pie subweapon. Which is already funny in and of itself, but here's the kicker: it has the Darkness elemental property, making it very useful when you fight the Whip's Memory, a projection of Richter Belmont, the last Belmont to wield the Vampire Killer whip. You can beat an extremely powerful vampire hunter by throwing pies at him!
    • Jonathan's Badass Boast after beating Death, "I don't need the Vampire Killer to kick your ass!"
  • Castlevania: Order of Ecclesia's Brachyura and Gravedorcus. SHOOUUUURRRGGGGG. As a commenter put it, "mwa haa haa haa. Top this shit, Persona 3."
  • In Castlevania: Judgment, when Trevor defeats Sypha (his wife) in his story mode.
    Trevor: I fought fair and won the day. If only that held true in the household...
  • Some of the Castlevania: Order of Ecclesia enemy descriptions can be hilarious.
    Grave Digger: Enjoys his cursed vocation because he meets new people.
    Werebat: A half-human half-bat. How about that.
    Dullahan: This knight doesn't need a head to hand his enemies theirs.
    Stone Rose: Once an insectivore, this plant's tastes have broadened.
    Mad Butcher: A madman with a mechanized saw. Enjoys butchery and sculpting.
    Double Hammer: The only thing more dangerous than a giant hammer is two.
  • Some items have hilarious descriptions on them.
    • In Order Of Ecclesia, the item description for the Spoiled Milk.
      Spoiled Milk: It's a milk that you can chew!
    • In Aria Of Sorrow, the description for the melon is quite clever. And most female enemies drop that item.
      Melon: A melon of the finest quality.
    • Similarly in Aria, the Succubus can drop a pudding.
      Pudding: It wiggles and jiggles.
  • In Harmony of Despair, there are several DLC characters that you must purchase to play as. If you play online with someone who's using a DLC character you don't have, they show up as... An Axe Armor. The limited animation fudged to convey complicated things can be gut-bustingly hilarious for the person watching.