ITT: ''WE ARE THE SOVIET TECHNOCRATS VS NAZI OCCULT EMPIRE''

Fortunately the deadline for my hit is flexible. My client simply wants von Eavle's head on a platter. Served well-done.

But pray tell, what had you planned for these combatants?

-Looks out at the fight between immortals with the aid of binoculars, ears perking at the sounds of distant music amongst the weapons fire-

B.A.: Mainly chasing off those British fools. They had no idea what they were dealing with, going back to the days before science turned things around for the world.

-stepping forward to look out at the fight- Heathens. -brings up hand to wiggle fingers and spark off psychic energy- Well, it's a good thing the occult is dying with the Empire. It's about time the world moved on from such time-wasting...

Well, I can't say that I could scare them off on my own.

-Eyes narrow, binoculars are lowered; the Brigadier turns around with a hard stare- B.A.: Wait, now I know who you are. You're one of those 'results' from the psionic weapons project, aren't you? Why were you sent, huh? So that they can pick my brains at will?

-smirks again- Great to see that the Red Scare is as strong as ever. I've moved on from espionage and have taken up a higher profile career. For me, it's money, control, and a stronger sense of accomplishment. My motive still stands: to bring in my hit.

B.A.: Huh! Fine. Again, why me, and what do I do?

A psionic... Another of their toys?

-Koschei lashes out, hitting the captain on the arm.-

(Ah, about time you showed up, fearless leader.)

-smirks- Brigadier Aleksandr: Alright, Agent Keybreak, assist the entity in getting rid of these foreigners. Then we'll discuss the mission at hand.

-Grabs the captain by the sword arm and breaks it.-

-flying low and fast, the mutant lovechild of this and this swoops through various features of the terrain, heading for the wrecked Marx. Its laser cannon (bulky though it may be) swivelling quickly-

[{Argh. Wait 6 hours. Need sleep.}]

(Six? Okay...)

-Hurls captain against a bulkhead, then heads off to take out the rest of the elves.-

edited 13th Jun '10 1:38:19 AM by Chabal2

-smashes one of the elves underfoot, then looks at the incoming aircraft-

Now What In The Nine Worlds Is ARGH!!

-one of the elves' halberds has slipped between a gap in Sleipnir's armour to pierce his flank; in retalion, the horse kicks him with enough force to send the offending elf flying in two different directions-

edited 13th Jun '10 6:22:11 AM by SullenFrog

-Ducks as the chopper passes overhead, then continues the slaughter.-

-continues running rampant across the deck of the ship, in spite of the halberd lodged in its flank-

Oh, This Is Going To Bite Me In The Ass When I Return To Asgard...I believe You Mentioned a Psionic, Czernobog; Do You Know Where This Mind-Reader Is, By Any Chance?

edited 13th Jun '10 6:33:12 AM by SullenFrog

Back with the Russians. Do you need help removing that?

All-Father, Yes! Fighting Will Be A Rather Unpleasant Chore If I Am Forced To Continue In This State.

kicks away a few elves and lies down so Koschei can get a grip on the shaft-

Wow. I did not expect that line to come out like that .

edited 13th Jun '10 6:42:04 AM by SullenFrog

-Striding MANFULLY over, Koschei GRIPS the LONG HARD SHAFT buried DEEP in Sleipnir's HEAVING, THROBBING FLANK, and PULLS IT OUT of the SUCKING GASH. Then he THRUSTS it into an EFFEMINATE-LOOKING elf, PENETRATING the SOFT YIELDING FLESH TO THE HILT of its ELONGATED blade.-

(I tried to work in a TURGID somewhere in there. Unfortunately for you man-on-horse Slash Fic readers, I failed.)

edited 13th Jun '10 7:06:14 AM by Chabal2

I LOL'ed. So hard.

-Sleipnir rises to his feet, tired after that exhausting experience-

Well, That Was An Amazing Half-Minute. I Offer My Thanks To Your Champion, Czernobog.

-turns around and blasts several elves to hell with his flaming nostrils-

edited 13th Jun '10 7:59:58 AM by SullenFrog

(Did the Earth Move for You, Too??)

(Alright, I'm knocking it off.)

-Koschei resumes punching and cleaving his way across the ship.-

These Alves Have Still Not Explained Why They Need These Materials. I Can Understand their Arrogance—They Are Alves, After All—But What Need Could Be So Dire That They Are Forced To Scavenge Battlefields So Far From Alfheim Or The Anglo-Saxon Isles?

edited 13th Jun '10 8:05:23 AM by SullenFrog

-teleporting closer to the scene- A lot of good money can come from scavenging, comrade. And despite my support for communism, I do appreciate my money.

-whickers in slight shock, then regains composure-

I Take It You Are The Psionic That Czernobog Detected?

-staves in the head of another elf-

I suppose I am. -psychically sweeps an elf off the ship- It disappoints me that those Nazis would resort to using elves. I assumed that they were all still for Aryanism.

-kicks several elves into the horizon-

I Know Not Where You Have Heard Such Slander, Mind-Reader, But The Aryans Are Not Aligned With These Alves. They Bear The Colours Of The Anglo-Saxons, Which Means that Either Freyr Has Betrayed Asgard Or That These Alves Have Broken Away From Alfheim.

-blasts some more elves-

edited 13th Jun '10 8:43:46 AM by SullenFrog