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Gallant and Goofus

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WillyFourEyes Skull Kid from some Netherworld Relationship Status: In another castle
Skull Kid
Feb 28th 2019 at 5:48:16 PM

Goofus' Animal Instinct is made from 99.92% pure animal blood. The other 0.08%? You Do NOT Want To Know...

Gallant's Auto Repair guarantees a bang-up job on your car, or your money back.

"Sonic 2 handles stubborn stains! Embarrassing bald spots? No problem!"
Leliel Sir Night, Wayward Hunter-Angel
Sir Night, Wayward Hunter-Angel
Feb 28th 2019 at 7:48:25 PM

Goofus' Scrap Shop tends to leave new bangs on the car, and expect to be paid extra if they don't get Cheeto dust everywhere in the engine.


Gallant Swift-Thought, through careful consideration of himself and his place in the world, transcends mortality through complete mastery of the arcane martial arts and becomes a beloved if strict teacher to generations of new heroes.

What rises must fall, what falls may rise again.
MvflG Cute girls and naval themes? Count me in! from The Blue Sea Kingdom Relationship Status: YOU'RE TEARING ME APART LISA
Cute girls and naval themes? Count me in!
Mar 1st 2019 at 12:41:24 AM

Goofus, as a result of never bothering to learn martial arts, is so bad at it that every time he tries doing a demonstration of karate he dies. Even in the afterlife.


Gallant doesn't mistreat his servants.

A sea witch. Still so young, she doesn't know the dirty side of the world.
Legend_Of_Snake369 cute mage gurl from the shadow realm, Jimbo! Relationship Status: In Lesbians with you
cute mage gurl
Mar 1st 2019 at 4:05:26 AM

Goofus has a basement filled with sex slaves and it ain't consentual.

Galient has a normal breakfest, usually toast or sometimes treats himself to eggs.

pink and white stripes are heccin' cute!
Playing_with_boy Not evil. from pg. 666 Relationship Status: Squeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Not evil.
Mar 1st 2019 at 4:15:17 PM

Goofus drinks 12 kilo liters of poison. Every day. For breakfast. With uranium. And Hawaiian pizza.

Gallant, when posting in the Gallant and Goofus game, always makes sure to add the good thing that Gallant does at the end of his posts.

Edit: Confused Goofus with Gallant.

Edited by Playing_with_boy on Mar 4th 2019 at 7:38:09 AM

Totally not suitable for the tweens and kiddos. -eevee
WillyFourEyes Skull Kid from some Netherworld Relationship Status: In another castle
Skull Kid
Mar 1st 2019 at 5:24:23 PM

Goofus, using "ImTotallyGallantUGaiz" as a Sockpuppet account, praises Goofus effusively while shitting on Gallant every second post.

[up](Remember, Gallant is the responsible one, and Goofus is the foolish one.)

Gallant studies the lie very carefully before lining up a putt.

Edited by WillyFourEyes on Mar 1st 2019 at 8:24:42 AM

"Sonic 2 handles stubborn stains! Embarrassing bald spots? No problem!"
Leliel Sir Night, Wayward Hunter-Angel
Sir Night, Wayward Hunter-Angel
Mar 1st 2019 at 9:24:04 PM

Goofus studies the line until the other golfers are so fed up with waiting they putt for him.


Gallant almost breathes magic given how much expertise he has in it, but respects it as a force and never takes too much of it when casting spells or recharging.

What rises must fall, what falls may rise again.
Legend_Of_Snake369 cute mage gurl from the shadow realm, Jimbo! Relationship Status: In Lesbians with you
cute mage gurl
Mar 1st 2019 at 9:30:26 PM

Goofus on the other hand uses the dark arts like raising the dead and summoning cthulu, none of this birthday party stuff!

Galiant when talking about media he likes on the internet always tries to respectful of other people's opinions, and, while he dosen't usually indulge in fanfics,fanart, and shipping he lways respects said members in question as long as they aren't hurting anybody.

pink and white stripes are heccin' cute!
YooberBop a cool hatís requiem from a wonderful parfait of happy sunny days Relationship Status: Hooked on a feeling
a cool hatís requiem
Mar 1st 2019 at 9:41:36 PM

Goofus has started many a Holy War within several fandoms over whether or not certain ships are canon.

Gallant owns a reasonable amount of collectible anime figurines.

ď...but I donít remember your name. Actually, who are yo-ď
MvflG Cute girls and naval themes? Count me in! from The Blue Sea Kingdom Relationship Status: YOU'RE TEARING ME APART LISA
Cute girls and naval themes? Count me in!
Mar 2nd 2019 at 7:26:50 AM A sea witch. Still so young, she doesn't know the dirty side of the world.
TroperNo9001 Tomewriggler from The bookhive Relationship Status: Squeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Tomewriggler
Mar 2nd 2019 at 7:28:45 AM

Goofus deletes his mom from his contacts when she texts him.

Gallant doesn't do viral Internet challenges.

[]I may only be five and a half sWeeps, but i'm not stupid! oWo[]
Legend_Of_Snake369 cute mage gurl from the shadow realm, Jimbo! Relationship Status: In Lesbians with you
cute mage gurl
Mar 2nd 2019 at 10:33:05 AM

Goofus forces young teens and choldren to do such challenges as "knife up the urethra challenge", the "toaster bath bomb challenge", the "poke your pupils with a sharpened paper clip challenge", the "nucleur funtime challenge", and his personal favorite, "ninja stars in the colon challenge!"

Gallient takes care of his movies, games, books, and music. All the discs have a protectibe case, all of his media is organised on shelfs, and he makes sure his room dosen't get too hot or too cold.

pink and white stripes are heccin' cute!
DatLonerGirl precious broccolis from a top secret place Relationship Status: Chocolate!
precious broccolis
Mar 2nd 2019 at 11:32:07 AM

Goofus buries his media collection in a cardboard box in the backyard. And they aren't even in their cases!

Gallant Pan takes kids on fun adventures in Neverland and takes them home safe if they want to leave.

Writer, or something.
atimnie The Video Guy from Chicago Relationship Status: Can't buy me love
The Video Guy
Mar 2nd 2019 at 12:04:37 PM

Goofus Jackson is similar, but he includes Jesus juice and fun little "toys".

Gallant gets the joke, and doesn't take it personally.

And you run and you run to catch up with the sun, but it's sinking, and racing around to come up behind you again
Jaxfirebus Going to die from On the bus Relationship Status: Non-Canon
Going to die
Mar 3rd 2019 at 3:40:52 PM

Goofus is THAT person who takes offense to everything no matter how small.

Gallant respects others opinions on his favorite show, even if they're negative.

Crap... why'd i let HIM drive?!
ArgonianLorekeeper TŠ sť deadly. from Colony 9 Relationship Status: THIS CONCEPT OF 'WUV' CONFUSES AND INFURIATES US!
TŠ sť deadly.
Mar 3rd 2019 at 4:08:22 PM

Goofus kills anyone who doesnít think his favourite show is perfect in every aspect.

Mr. Gallant helps out his students if they donít understand the material.

Is mise Bart Simpson. Is maith liom techno.
YooberBop a cool hatís requiem from a wonderful parfait of happy sunny days Relationship Status: Hooked on a feeling
a cool hatís requiem
Mar 3rd 2019 at 4:54:02 PM

Mr. Goofus speaks unnaturally quickly and never stops to answer questions.

Gallant never screams or spams in voice chat.

ď...but I donít remember your name. Actually, who are yo-ď
Legend_Of_Snake369 cute mage gurl from the shadow realm, Jimbo! Relationship Status: In Lesbians with you
cute mage gurl
Mar 3rd 2019 at 5:09:46 PM

Goofus is tgat one kid who immediatly starts screeching "MING AWAY!!!!"

galiant takes good care of his pets, he dosen't own too much and he keeps them well fed.

pink and white stripes are heccin' cute!
MvflG Cute girls and naval themes? Count me in! from The Blue Sea Kingdom Relationship Status: YOU'RE TEARING ME APART LISA
Cute girls and naval themes? Count me in!
Mar 3rd 2019 at 7:18:39 PM

Goofus keeps 1000 types of animals in his house, and feeds them all a kilogram of hot dogs everyday.


Gallant Animal Shelter discourages pet breeding and only euthanises animals that are otherwise suffering.

A sea witch. Still so young, she doesn't know the dirty side of the world.
atimnie The Video Guy from Chicago Relationship Status: Can't buy me love
The Video Guy
Mar 3rd 2019 at 8:21:39 PM

Goofus kills all animals coming into his shelter, for use in his side business of taxidermy.

Gallant only masturbates once a week, to swimsuit ads.

And you run and you run to catch up with the sun, but it's sinking, and racing around to come up behind you again
Playing_with_boy Not evil. from pg. 666 Relationship Status: Squeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Not evil.
Mar 4th 2019 at 7:41:04 AM

Goofus masterbates once an hour. To pedophiles doing their... thing.

Gallant always waits in line to get some candy.

Totally not suitable for the tweens and kiddos. -eevee
unfortunatezorua Consummate liar from despacito spaghett ugandan chungus Relationship Status: watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ
Consummate liar
Mar 4th 2019 at 8:14:33 PM

Goofus kills whoever answers the door with a shotgun and loots the candy off their dead body whenever he goes trick-or-treating.

Gallant won No Nut November.

MY NAME IS DESPHAGETTO YOU KILLED MY MEMES PREPARE TO DIE
DatLonerGirl precious broccolis from a top secret place Relationship Status: Chocolate!
precious broccolis
Mar 4th 2019 at 10:19:20 PM

Goofus lost the nanosecond it started.

Gallant goes to bed at a reasonable time.

Writer, or something.
Legend_Of_Snake369 cute mage gurl from the shadow realm, Jimbo! Relationship Status: In Lesbians with you
cute mage gurl
Mar 5th 2019 at 5:12:39 AM

Goofus never sleeps and injects cola and coffee straight into his veins!

Gallant stays bundled up in cold weather.

pink and white stripes are heccin' cute!
unfortunatezorua Consummate liar from despacito spaghett ugandan chungus Relationship Status: watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ
Consummate liar
Mar 5th 2019 at 5:22:51 AM

Goofus strips naked and runs around outside during -20 degree blizzards.

Gallant always makes sure to wear his seatbelt.

MY NAME IS DESPHAGETTO YOU KILLED MY MEMES PREPARE TO DIE

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