The Great TV Tropes Road Trip

The van stirred out of the parking lot, onto the road.

“Alright can we finally play a car game? I’ve not wanted anything more than to play a classic car game with my buddies!”

"Sounds fun!" says Bluethorn. "Route had mentioned an interesting game a while back. I think it was called 'categories'?"

“Alrighty, who’s got a category?”

“Confections.”

"Wait! I just remembered. Before we head out, we gotta steal a cow."

Bais, consumed in a phone game throughout the entire adventure, raises their head at the mention of committing a theft

"You plan on taking the heat if we get caught?"

They say eyes still shadowed by their forehead

Edited by Baisteach on Mar 1st 2020 at 3:32:27 AM

"Chocolate eclairs!" says Bluethorn. "Man, I love those."

Man, we're probably on the heat's hitlist anyway due to business fraud and theft of all the park's property. And once you get locked into a serious crime spree, the tendency is to push it as far as you can.

"Y'all perpetrated a fraud?!"

Edited by Baisteach on Mar 1st 2020 at 4:07:05 AM

Weeeelll...

Wm then proceeds to recap a slightly-self-serving version of the events at Totally Not a Deathrap-Filled Amusement Park. Not helping matters is the fact that he's picked up a tape recorder from one of the may piles of junk in the trunk and pressed 'record.'

See, we park in lot X-6, and decide to spend a few minutes just dicking around at the park. We end up in the gift shop and everything there is grotesquely overpriced. I don't think there was anything in that store that was cheaper than 50 bucks. So, as a lark, I decide to ask "how much for the park," fully expecting to be laughed out of the store due to my... unique fashion sense, let's call it that. She turns my offer to buy the park down, so Taco comes up and asks her the same question. She then points us to the boss' office. We get there—oh, and along the way, we meet Bale. Anyway, we get there, and the office is completely empty except for the boss. ...actually, I think his name WAS Boss, now that I think on it, but that's not important. We go up to him and I tell him that I plan to purchase the park. That was what should have been the point where he turned us away. Instead, we haggled for a good few minutes, then he challenged me to a death game. By that point, we went too far to say "no," so I said "yes." He takes me to this clown building with a rollercoaster inside of it. I ride it, and meet a demon. He was a friendly chap, and was kind enough to let me go free. But when I get out, Boss tells me he's gone back on the deal based on something I allegedly said on the rollercoaster.

Taco and Bale, who were both there for large portions of the story, will almost certainly notice all the lies and omissions Wm has included in this retelling.

Routeferret looked up at the mention of a rollercoaster.

“Wish I was awake when we got there. Seriously - demon or not, I would have gone on to get the coaster credit.”

He shut himself in the luggage case again, with Headlong Flight blaring from inside.

Edited by Routeferret on Mar 1st 2020 at 12:38:02 PM

"Yup. Now let's steal a cow."

Bais having listened to that is now confused, but then undergoes the realization that, quite honestly, he was with the shit anyway

"Alright, we stealin' it live or dead is the question?"

He says loading a revolver

Edited by Baisteach on Mar 1st 2020 at 5:13:42 AM

"Live! We're stealing it live! We're not killing the cow! Why does everyone keep trying to shoot people?"

"Yeah, we are not hurting our new floofy cow fren."

"...I guess that sounds wrong because we just ate hamburgers. Well, this is our chance to save one, at least."

Edited by DrNoPuma on Mar 1st 2020 at 8:40:07 AM

I suspect my editor's gonna think I'm making a pro-vegan diatribe when I publish this... Wm muses, looking at his typewriter.

"Are you talking about me? I'm no vegan, to be honest. I'm just not going to steal a cow just to kill it."

"All I'm asking is how are we gonna smuggle a LIVNG COW across state and for what purpose at that?"

"My cat and I just survived hanging over a bunch of meat grinders, and After survived and recovered from a gunshot. We'll find a way."

Steph blinks, "Stealing a cow is gonna be very hard,"

"I feel like that cow will get useful somehow... plus, more animal friends sound great!"

"Y'all need to find some room with all these people in this van"

Edited by Baisteach on Mar 1st 2020 at 6:35:09 AM

“Bias, please. You’re being a Debbie Downer. Let’s get the cow!”

The van makes a u-turn, and drives near the Burger Factory. Taco pulls out a pair of binoculars from the glove compartment.

“Alright, what’s the plan?”

"It's Bais. Trust me."

"I'm not sure yet, but I'll let you all decide where we're going next."