I use a baseball bat to throw a baseball at Knife knocking her out of the jetski, i then walk up to her unconscious body and took the pizza.

Guma comically drops a MIDI keyboard on Tzaoray’s head, because dropping a real piano would be too soul-crushing. It works the same way, however, and he steals the pizza.

"Soul-crushing, you say?"

[Fwoosh! Cutbug, donning a rather intricate Shang Tsung cosplay, swipes Guma’s soul. Rather than using it to empower themself, however, they just crush it, toss the remains aside, and snatch the pizza.] "Man, I wish there were more vehicles in that series or something."

awe921 dials up someone.

... then out of nowhere, a badly drawn Timeline Master bursts out of the sky and grabs Cutbug, sending her to Brazil- i mean AGOM.

awe921 takes the pizza that she left behind, before playing a sick tune on a whistle to summon a tornado to take him somewhere. unfortunately, it ends up summoning...

Superjohn, who crushes Awe with a giant pumpkin, he then flees with the pizza.

Edited by Superjohn on Oct 22nd 2020 at 2:04:56 PM

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

I LET OUT A FIERCE BATTLE CRY AS I RAM OVER SUPERJOHN WITH A ROCKET JET BOOSTED TRUCK WITH GUNS AND ROCKETS ON ALMOST EVERY PART OF ITS EXTERIOR. I then stop typing in caps, picked up the pizza and went back into my super truck safe and sound.

Foreman takes the pizza, and makes a long drawn out speach about how he's sorry and he didn't know that the page joke would have so much flake (point out he wasn't specifically told not to do that) and amits he's unwothy and give the Pizza to the next trooper and is killed off for real

What Tzaoray didn't account for was Knife, chilling in the super truck already. She summons a glowing blade of divine lightning, and blasts it into his chest. She then drives the truck, with the pizza in shotgun, down to the seashore for a picnic.

I hire Elon Musk to fire a space laser on the super truck completely destroying it.

I head to the wreckage and found a shiny intact pizza, i then lick it tenderly.

[Cutbug has Tzaoray arrested and sent to a supermax prison for licking the pizza.] "Have you learned nothing from the ice cream incident? Nasty-ass..." [They look at the licked pizza.] "I don’t—I don’t even want this anymore! Here, lemme find a new one." [They go to the nearest pizzeria to order a replacement pizza.]

Guma takes the pizza. That was easy as fuck.

Gumas neck gets snapped by Superjohn, who steals the pizza and drives off in a limo.

the limo had... an actual driver, for once.

unfortunately, another car was being driven by awe921, who proceeds to headshot the driver and then jump in, making a turn so tight it flips the car into a 720 1080 corkscrew noscope jump, before landing into the water and blowing up.

awe then rises from the wreckage and takes the pizza, improvising an unicycle to escape with while carrying the pizza.

here comes dat boi.

Knife walks up to Awe with the player's handbook. "Hey, I can use a third level spellslot now, right?" Awe nods confusingly, and Knife rolls 4d8.

"Alright, that plus the 2d6 from this greatsword, that's..." She slams her sword down on Awe with a mighty jolt of radiant damage. She then grabs the pizza and runs.

Mad walks up to Knife in a fancy suit and a top hat. He takes off his glove and smacks Knife in the face with it, and takes the pizza.

Dookie runs over Mad in his car, gets out of the car, and then takes the pizza from him.

He gets back in the car, finds Foreman Grill's dead body, and grills the pizza on it.

Edited by DookieIdiotNimrod on Oct 22nd 2020 at 7:15:15 AM

Guma has Dookie executed by Puritans for the crime of grilling a pizza. He gets the pizza as a reward.

Suddenly, Guma finds themself surrounded by snakes, and by the time the snakes leave, Guma finds they've snatched the pizza, and have given it to their master, Serpentine, who says:
"Thanksssss for making it ssssso eassssy, mate! Thissssss will be sssshared equally among the ssssnakes now."
However, then she turns around and..............

Edited by SmilyTrope112 on Oct 22nd 2020 at 6:20:50 PM

...Mad has a gun.

"I have a gun, lol!"

The Serpentine drops the pizza in fear.

"Hah, loser! This is a fake gun!"

Mad throws the gun away.

"And that's a fake pizza!"

The pizza box opens up and inside is a pizza made out of clay.

"And I'm a fake madface7!"

Mad turns into a wooden cutout of himself.

Mad somehow runs off with the real pizza amidst the confusion.

Edited by madface7 on Oct 22nd 2020 at 1:31:49 PM

Robin readies Sagittarius Arrow.

The catboy kneels on the ground and draws his bow, pointing it upward at a 45-degree angle.

"Dodge this," he says, grinning wildly as he looses the arrow.

A Rain of Arrows falls upon Serpentine and her snakes, filling them all with feathers.

Robin pauses for thought. "I've just done the same thing three different ways now, haven't I?"

Edited by TempestSystem on Oct 22nd 2020 at 11:28:26 AM

Idiot uses the power of godmodding to blow up Robin with a bomb, but just as he is about to pick up the pizza, another bomb goes off, this bomb was se off by...

Superjohn, who takes the pizza and hijacks a submarine to escape.

But someone was waiting inside for him.

[It was Cutbug, wearing a SplashWoman cosplay. They whistle a couple of notes, and several angry fish, lured by the sound of their voice, attack the submarine. Cutbug snags the pizza and swims away right as the fish break into the sub and devour John.]

...Wm, dressed as Sean Connery's character in The Hunt for Red October. Wm takes Superjohn prisoner, storing him in the brig. Wm then confiscates the pizza and breaches the surface in the middle of the Pacific Ocean to share the pizza with the sub's crew when the timeline aborts.

MEANWHILE, IN THE REAL TIMELINE...

Wm, dressed as a movie executive, approaches Cutbug with a movie deal to join the DC Extended Universe. Wm requests the pizza as collateral, taking it when Cutbug starts to consider the offer. The movies are never made, Wm has ripped off a promising young actor, and he currently has the pizza.

Edited by WilliamRadarStorm on Oct 22nd 2020 at 11:58:55 AM

Suddenly, a giant needle punctures the side of the sub. Custard, in a scuba suit, unceremoniously slides out. After 360 noscoping Wm, she hijacks the sub and hits Cutbug the way.

Edited by CustardAndPie on Oct 22nd 2020 at 2:00:50 PM