ITT: We are all Pokémon Trainers

Geographic Society Office, Castelia City

Tommy arrives, sullen expression on his face, wearing what appears to be a traffic cone on his head. It's still stuck there. How it manages to not obscure his face, not impede his breathing, and still stay stuck is beyond him. It may have something to do with the helmet though. He left it unstrapped.

He walks to his cubicle in awkward silence, holding a sack of camera traps on his person. He drops them in front of the desk and proceeds to punch in, upon which he comes back to his cubicle.

The awkward silence envelops the room, broken only by the purring sounds of Peterson's purugly.

Peterson, holding Mrs. Mittens: Hey, Andy, are you alright?

Tommy: Nasty little accident near the road works. I'll be fine.

Pearson: You need help with that, T.A.P.?

Tommy: Well, actually—

A wild Hank Harvey arrives.

Hank Harvey: PEEERZEEEN! I'm not paying you three to act like the world's most mismatched boyband. Get back to work!

Peterson: Dibs on Zayn.

Thomas Anthony Peterson used Comically Missing the Point. The other two glower at him. It wasn't very effective.

Pearson: You strike me more as Niall Horan, actually.

Even worse.

Hank: Petersen, what on earth are you wearing?

Tommy: Well, actually—

The other two: Business casual, like always.

Hank facepalmed in a manner that you would normally associate with sullen Gamefreak representatives.

Hank: I couldn't have been more clearly talking about the 20-something with a traffic cone. Big Lady Gaga fan, by the way. Live your truth, Petersen.

Hank walks away with an arrogant swagger.

Hank: And Grant, tell that slacker Thorpe to have that new story on my inbox by midnight tonight. We're a publication, people. Holidays don't apply.

Shutter walks in with a large cup of coffee.

Shutter: Okay, what's with the cone?

Tommy: Biking accident on the way to collecting camera traps.

Castelia City, Earlier

Tommy, perched in a fire escape, is browsing the images caught by the camera traps of Arachna-Guy stopping random Plasma grunts from ruining an ongoing parade.

Tommy: Yep, definitely this pic. And I look extra ripped in this one; that's definitely gonna be on the website. And this one makes me look like a badass. And this one's a bit gratuitous, not selling that. This one, though; definitely yes. I'll come up with a patriotic-sounding caption on the way.

He puts away the camera traps and proceeds to leave. He jumps down, unchains and hops on his fixie bike, and rides off. The sound of crashing can be heard not long after.

Geo Soc Offices

Shutter: Couldn't you try cutting that open?

Tommy: The fellas at public works begged me not to.

Shutter: So, did Hank chastise you or something.

Tommy: Surprisingly, no.

Shutter: That's odd. Like, he's normally the adversarial boss toward everybody but he seems to have it out for you specifically. Like the Cosmo Spacely to your George Jetson, or the Clayton Forrester to your Mike Nelson. Or the Giuseppe to the quirky villain team in Capumon. Or the J. Jonah Jameson to your—

Tommy: Shut up.

Shutter: Fine, you don't have to be so touchy Mr. Negative. Let's get this thing off you before you grump up the whole place like the Teen Beat version of Hank Harvey.

Peterson, Pearson, and Penelope join Shutter in trying to forcibly pull Tommy's head out of the traffic cone.

Tommy: Shouldn't we try to lubricate this first!

Pearson: There's no time for lubricant!

As soon as the awkward appearance of them trying to pull the traffic cone out of Tommy's head began, guess who walked in?

Jonathan, carrying [Tim Hortons]: Happy 4th of July, everyone. I brought doughnuts and— what the fuck.

The traffic cone came off with a pop. Everyone collapses in an awkward heap. Tommy's helmet rolls down toward Jonathan and stops at his feet.

Tommy: Bonjour and welcome to Unova.

Edited by MasterJayAM on Mar 18th 2020 at 11:30:54 PM

Megan: -beams-

-...-

Pippy: -from where they're trying to repair the new giant hole in the wall- <Pssssst!>

Megan: ?

Pippy: -beaking- (<Ask her if she wants to do something later!>)

Megan: Oh? Oh!

-and a lot of things seem to hit her all at once-

-going equally red- Uh, right now, I think I have some stuff I need to take care of...

Megan: ...

Megan: oh gods, Mom's gonna kill me

-...-

Megan: -shaking out of it- —but, uh, when that's done,

do you

want to

-...-

-and from there she makes a helpless sort of flaily gesture-

Pippy: -would faceflipper, but then he'd have to cover his eyes-

Vee: -near Jean- <Yup! None of us died or anything!>

<How've ya been, Jean, ya gun of a gun?>

Logan: -lightly- It's good to see you too!

-claps hands- Well, it seems like you're not suffering from acute smoke inhalation, severe perforation, or maiming in a general sense.

Mmm. While we're on the subject, how have you been since we left? From the look of it, you've gotten involved in some close-quarters work yourself?

-yeah, they're both still wearing Möbius uniforms-

Reunion Room

PEFE!Every: Hm. You have been gone since April of last year? Things have largely been uneventful. I worked at Mobius as a double agent...

Scuttle: <Let's be real. You were just working for them.>

PEFE!Every: I helped create some of what Multiman has termed superbosses. If you look up August 2018 Lumiose attacks, you'll see them. They were interesting. Then I was sucked into an alternate universe and told off the version of my mother living there...

Scuttle: <Wait what>

PEFE!Every: And things have been largely uneventful since then. Scuttle, remind me to collect my things from the Mobius ship.

Scuttle: -sighs-

Rotary: <Gah! What are you doing here?>

PEFE!Every: What are you doing here?

Diggersby: -chews carrot- <What are any of us doing here?>

PEFE!Every: Anyway, Logan, where have you been?

Angela Coast, One of Susan's Houses

-Susan has taken a break from the stressful process of writing a new song and trying to figure out what she wants to do with her damn career to instead lay out on the couch and scroll through the comments on the Phansite that have built up over the course of the last few months. Stewing like this hasn't helped the sensation in her blood, the roiling desire to help and sow discord among the minds of the corrupt and be a hero...-

Latias: Hey Sue, whatcha reading?

Susan: Hm? Oh just general social media stuff.

-Latias lingers at the door for a moment, trying to gauge what that means from Susan's expression-

Latias: Alright. Just don't pay the haters no mind m'kay?

Susan: Null sheen dear.

-Susan gives a warm smile that Latias returns before wandering elsewhere in the house. Once the coast is clear, Susan starts composing a post to a group chat...-

Today

Union Room, Past

Jean: Gun of a gun, I like that. And not much, we haven't been up to much.

-Pidge snuggles Vee-

Vee: -laughs for a really long time-

-eventually- <—hahahahahahaha! Ha.>

<The hobo knight and her hobo helpers would've appreciated some of that. Ha.>

-she accepts Rockruff cuddles, gratefully-

Logan: -looks briefly like they want to object somehow, then remembers-

Dr. Ironspine: -standing in front of a mirror, surrounded by empty ice cream tins-    <FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLS—>   

Logan: ...alright. That sounds...positive. I think I've completely destroyed my frame of reference for what's normal. Hm.

Addie: -to the Diggersby- <Depending on how profound you want to get, anywhere from "being" to "Palkia only knows, take a drink">

Logan: -scratching Addie's head- And...being specific, I've been mostly in a version of the universe where Arceus was...

...divided, and worlds built on the remains. It was almost unrecognizable as a universe once similar to ours.

-someone tackles him-

Silas sat at a table, his laptop open and Bishop and Hacks looking over the files with him, he was about to start talking about what they currently had, only for Silas to get tackled.

Silas blinked, "Okay who in the he-" and then he saw who it was.

Reunion Room, past

PEFE!Every: Cool! Do you have the coordinates?

Scuttle: -coughs, somehow-

PEFE!Every: That is, I am sorry that you experienced that. It sounds like it was a difficult time, and I am glad you are safe.

-it's suddenly very quiet-

Logan: -convincingly unemotional- ... ... ...no, I don't know how to get back there.

-...-

-likewise cough- And your concern is appreciated.

But is there a dimensional coordinate system? We, frankly, really could've used one trying to come home. We might've wandered forever if we hadn't stumbled across that raid.

Addie: -squirrel purr-

-it's Megan!-

Megan: SILAS

-and the tackle was in fact a hug!-

I missed you so much

Edited by Asterisk395 on Jul 4th 2019 at 12:00:58 PM

Reunion Room, past

PEFE!Every: There is! It's complicated, Brie knows more about it than I do.

-she offers Addie a pet-

Stormchaser, I cant think of a witty title

Daydre blinks.

"Do I want to flail?"

Azure has recovered from smacking into the floor, has somehow gotten popcorn from somewhere, and is watching this unfold with amusement.

-her redness indicates her poor tormented nerves-

Megan: I—I mean—

-she has way too much momentum to just stop now, though, so-

Pippy: -mock-sighing- <I have to do everything around here.>

-little water ball-

Megan: Would you,

-glowy crest, Mist-

like to,

-Flash Cannon!-

-hesitating- ...go swimming—

-which hits the optically-optimized little sphere and bounces off of the Mist and explodes into a dazzling background of prismatic hearts, all around the two of them-

—with me...?

-and she doesn't seem to respond to them at all, since she's looking right at Daydre the whole time-

Addie: -is pet-

Logan: Oh, is this the Brie Megan's told me about? I'll have to ask her, then.

-also pets-

-and glances out the window- Huh. Good for her.

-they smile-

Stormchaser Oh Wait Really Shit

Daydre is like, partially sure that she's hallucinating all the lighting effects what with all the blood rushing through her head but you know what she's not gonna worry about that right now

"U-uhm, y-yes, of course?"

Silas stared, his face turning pale(er), he scrambled to his feet and got Megan off of him, he stared at her. His face sullen and confused, his eyes bulging out as he saw what was before him. It was no surprise that something in his brain snapped.

In a instant his face turned to shock, confusion, disbelief, back to shock, amazement, and soon the sides of his mouth twitched and his eyes watered. Silas, started to laugh, his voice cracked and the laughter became louder, unlike his usual laughs this was deeper, tears streaked down from his eyes.

Silas scooped Megan up and held her in a tight ursaring hug and was practically spinning, "HOLY SHIT YOU'RE BACK!!"

Hacks was staring at this scene, ~Arceus... Megan's back...~

"And the Captain is actually emoting," Bishop added.

Roxy walked over holding two soft drinks from a vending machine, and she saw Silas hugging someone tight, she was confused until she realized who it was. A small smile appeared on Roxy's face as she stepped over, "Care to introduce us?"

Silas stopped, laughed a bit and set Megan down, "Uh yeah... Megan, a looooot has happened, so first up, this is my girlfriend Roxanne."

"Bonjour!"

Fortis: Hey Piano, can you do me a favor?

Mezzo: Mmm? Does it involve being thrown off a cliff?

-Fortis shakes her head-

Fortis: I was just thinking that I should take a picture of Astral and me together to remember each other by after we're gone.

Astral: -shivers-

Mezzo: You sure that's such a good idea? I mean, we are supposed to be keeping Astral hidden.

Fortis: But memories are important!

Astral: <I don't understand, but this sounds interesting.>

Mezzo: Okay, okay, but if it gets leaked, it's your fault.

-Fortis hands her Xtransceiver to Mezzo, then wraps her arms around the moonbat; Astral responds with a semi-winghug-

Mezzo: Okay, a little closer and then... all right. Say "Cheese!"

Fortis & Astral: Cheeese!>

-click◊-

A commission by RexDraco!

Mezzo: Huh, not bad.

Edited by Mezzopiano on Jul 5th 2019 at 4:18:32 AM

Megan: -having passed up "Tamato" and currently approaching "luminescent"- O-okay then! .///.

-she looks like she's about to go in for another hug, but then she hesitates and...shakes Daydre's hand-

-with both her hands-

-...-

-...-

-...-

-and then she lets go of Daydre's hand and flees in the direction of the Stormchaser-

Pippy: -Weezing-

-upon being removed, Megan stumbles back, nervous-

-did she make him upset? Maybe it's been too long-

Megan: -trembling- Silas what's your face—

-and then he laughs and picks her up in a hug and all is well-

-the tension breaks, and she starts laughing too-

Megan: -brightly- Silas! You got an arm! ^_^

-and she starts trying to get her feet under herself to pick him up instead-

There's—nngh—so much stuff I have to tell—

-Roxy-

Megan: Silas, you got a girlfriend! :D

Hi, I'm Megan! I don't think we've met?

Vee: -chuckles knowingly-

-Kai — who, as we have established, is kind of sleepy and out of it right now — has started trudging their way toward the Union Room to see what all is going on.-

-And suddenly a nerd in scalemail armor is running in their direction.-

-They realize who it is about five clank-inducing steps away from them.-

Kai: ...Megan?????

Roxy gives a smug smile and then twirls, "Oh we have met before, my full name is Roxanne Ribbon after all~!"

Silas sighs and starts to return to his usual tone, "Yeah she tried on a human scarf and decided that she liked being human more."

"Yes, It's great! Long legs, thumbs, not being able to smell and hear everything, it's fantastic!"

Hacks spoke up, ~She hung about for a bit and then decided to spring the dating idea on him, he's taken it well.~

"But more seriously, Megan... what the hell happened, where did you go?"

Stormchaser, Gay

Daydre just sorta stands there with a dumb smile on her face as Megan shakes her hands and walks away.

As soon as Megan is out of sight all tension leaves her body and she just collapses onto the ground.

-Megan, who is blushing up to her ears, high on homesickness, and only actually ran like five feet to where she could put her back to a wall, buries her face in armored hands and squees-

Megan: -incoherent emotion venting-

Vee: -slinking after her- <Oh hai Kai!> .3

Megan: !!!!?!

Megan: Ribbon! :D

Vee: <Eh, not being able to see and hear everything's too weird for me.>

<But hey, 'vee to 'vee—nice.>

-and she coils up on her tail and holds up a stubby paw for a high-five-

Megan: I've been (kinda unwillingly) in another universe! And then a bunch of other universes, very briefly! Lost! Very, very lost.

-beaming- But Silas, I've been to s p a c e

-and she steps back, and she seems to be wearing a space suit of the "soft", form-fitting variety, blue with conduits of...something glowing running through it-

Weird alternate universe space—

-upon closer inspection, it actually seems to be...woven, of some kind of wool??-

-increasingly giddy- And I! Have!!!

-vibrating- So much Science I've been dying to share over the past few months and months and—

Silas whistles, before seeing Megan start vibrating, "Calm down. We have a lot to cover but sadly my ship is out for repairs-"

Roxy gives Vee a little high five

"-Seeing as someone burnt up the lounge this morning."

"Not my fault!"

~It most certainly was your fault,~ Hacks said.

Roxy gave him a look as Silas continued, "Add in some upgrades cause I have been very busy recently. We have plenty of time to talk science when I get my lab slash workshop back. I'm just glad you're back."

~We're all very glad you're back safe and sound.~

Kai: ??????

-There's a lot to process.-

-Megan's here.-

-Megan's here after a year of absence.-

-Megan's here after a year of absence, in heavy armor.-

-Megan's here after a year of absence, in heavy armor, with her entire face bright red.-

-Using context clues and their incredible insight, Kai realizes exactly what's happening.-

Kai: Oh gosh you must be overheating like crazy in that armor

-Exactly what's going on.-

Kai: Do you, uh, need some water? Any help with anything? Please don't die of heat stroke the moment I see you again. I, uh, think I might have some ice cream or something in my room??? Maybe a popsicle or just some plain old ice cubes or something????

Edited by BittersweetNSour on Jul 6th 2019 at 2:33:54 PM

-at the question, Vee wtffaces-

Vee: <...excuse me?!>

Megan: -still super red-

Vee: -yowling- <Do you, my friend, think I would be so careless, nay, negligent, as to allow my Trainer to overheat with the powers at my command?!>

Megan: -practically leaking steam-

Vee: <The answer is yes! But only if it's funny!>

-huffily- <And it won't be due to a lack of water. Honestly.>

Megan: Cooldown would be appreciated, yes

Also hugs

Mesprit, I've missed you

Vee: <Hm? Yeah, it's good to see ya. You smell like drowsiness are you getting enough rest? You gotta sleep 'cause humans die if they don't sleep.>

-with some effort, Megan reins it in-

Megan: I'm so

so

so glad to be back! I missed you.

Vee: -curiously- <So what've you guys been busy with lately? We're a year behind on the gossipé.>

Edited by Asterisk395 on Jul 6th 2019 at 3:09:36 PM

Silas stands there for a moment, and gives Megan another quick hug, "I missed you as well."

He lets go and straights himself, "As for what, been keeping busy. Finally got my replacement arm, even transforms," he said holding up his left hand, "Diane was fantastic to work with."

~We're also still dealing with the Delta stuff but we got a team and such formed now relating to that,~ Hacks added.

"And I've been working out," Roxy said, "I look good and I feel good."

"Were you always like this?"

"Don't say my pokemon self wasn't cute!"

Silas sighed, "And most recently I've taken up a investigation in Unova, a man is missing, possibly dead and my main suspect is a cloaked figure who can vanish in a instant. Which is annoying and means I have to recompile my list of suspects and do more digging into why someone would want to attack the victim."

"We are very busy Ensign," Bishop put plainly.