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^^^ I spray paint you pink and glue a set of cat ears to your head. Everyone thinks you're taking the cuteness too far and are thus unimpressed.
^ I set up giant windbreaks. The day is saved!
I develop a Super Prototype baked potato annihilator and prepare to destroy every baked potato in the world (what? I don't like baked potatoes).
edited 27th Jan '11 10:30:58 AM by Bisected8
I fire off an EMP pulse next to your prototype, therby destroying it.
I WILL TAKE OVER THE WORLD WITH MY LEGION OF SPIDDDERS!!!!!
Easy, bug spray.
Now I w-*'SNAP'*
This worlds reckoning has come.
This flesh will summon MY progenitor, Neh-Zamoth'kin
With the plot that this thread had been created in a clever attempt at comedy.
My plans have one outcome.
Your plan is futile and will go nowhere,humanity will rise up and tear you a new one.
My Evil Plan
All of humanity will be destroyed in a swift balance of judgement.
All those who oppose it shall be reconditioned into Mary Sues who will spread their influence on revolutionists who dare to fight.
Those who pray against me shall have a freezing cold meteor dropped on their town/city/village.
Anyone who dares to take the fight to me directly shall suffer the full penance of my retribution.
Nothing can stop SS,the almighty universal judgement from dealing with Earth's sins and malavolence.
edited 21st Jul '12 6:50:50 AM by XiphosOrochi666
Your seemingly water-tight plan is inadvertently foiled by one of the Mary Sues, who is helpful to a fault but just too dumb for her own good. As it all goes up in smoke and the irate masses close in, she smiles cutely and says, "Oopsie." :3
I have a machine that can turn all the world's water into a deadly poison. I threaten to use it if the world doesn't submit to me as their God Empress. Myehehehe~! (Monocle.)
I have an assassin rig it to poison your morning coffee.
I've somehow got a patent on the manufacture of 555 timer chips. Thus bringing the electronics world to its knees.
Ha! You never expected PATENT MAN to show up!
I have the Pope and President held hostage, and plan to merge them into one horrible creation: THE POPESIDENT
Bet you didn't count on THE DALAI QUEEN OF ENGDIA to show up.
I shall bring the world to its knees with my giant speakers that blare a never-ending loop of Rebecca Black's Friday. I have ear-protection, of course.
edited 21st Jul '12 9:07:34 AM by MobileLeprechaun
I place explosives all around the speakers, then cause them to detonate and blow up the speakers.
I shall steal the computers of the world, and fore everyone to agree to allow me to take over the world in exchange for getting their computers back.
edited 21st Jul '12 9:41:41 AM by KatanaCat
I build more computers. That, or I take some when you're not looking, because that's a lot of computers to keep track of.
I will re-release Star Wars again, and force all television stations to show it simultaneously.
edited 21st Jul '12 5:03:46 PM by VmKid
Star Wars is more popular than ever. Thanks, I guess.
When Sonic and Sega All-Stars Racing Transformed comes out, I steal every copy in the world, for myself.
edited 21st Jul '12 6:12:04 PM by PhysicalStamina
I have sleeper agents around the world who plant remotely-activated explosives in every game store. Just try it.
Together with my eeeeeevil generic super villain cat Mr. Piddles I shall conquer the cat food industry! -generic super villain laugh-
Kill all the cats. Simple.
I will dig a hole to the center of the earth and have lava burn everything muahahaha!
edited 21st Jul '12 6:38:45 PM by Lilqueendaisy
Not too difficult since you'll either be incinerated or crushed by the enormous pressures by going just a few miles down. Which ever one does it first I suppose.
I shall harness the powers of spam and create the ultimate canned meat-like-substance!
I invent a method of freeze drying which renders cans obsolete.
I disguise myself as a rock and attempt to sneak into the UN to slip a resolution making me god-emperor of man kind in.
Rocks can't move. You get nowhere.
With the power of Ret Gone, I erase Chris Chan from existence.
...Which causes you to become he who you hate.
I wrote an incredibly catchy new song with a hidden message telling all who listen to crown me their Supreme Empress. It's about to be preformed on national television. Mweheheheh... >:3
I start a major riot just as you begin your broadcast, causing your station to air the breaking news instead of the song.
I shall reverse the magnetic poles of the earth, causing all magnetic objects to be flung halfway across the world!
Unaccountably, you are crushed by the giant magnet under France, the Particle Acceleration thing.
I will turn all the worlds sweet things to salty!
I turn all the world's salty things sweet in response. Free caviar for everyone!
I become a nigh-invulnerable elder thing and set to mind raping the entire human populace.
Some aliens from another planet come to Earth to save humanity from you.
I wage a war on nature with a bunch of polluting factories and evil robots.
EARTH. FIRE. WIND. WATER. HEART. GO PLANET!
With your powers combined, I AM CAPTAIN PLANET!
I use the powers of nature to wage war on civilization.
I pollute the world, so nature dies.
I become a god among giant tentacle monsters, and set off to destroy the Galaxy.
I get Aquaman to convince the tentacle monsters to not help you, but rather rip you apart and eat you.
I use reality-warping powers to defy physics and become large enough to deplete all of Earth's oxygen.
I trick you into eating me and use that to my advantage by destroying your heart and shrinking you after jumping out of your throat
I build a robot similar in design to Super Mecha Sonic from Sonic 3 and Knuckles,increase it's power level until it becomes golden and send it to destroy all opposition.
At that time I will have flown to my ultimate battle fortress on the moon ready to fire a death beam to destroy the planet.
If the robot turns against me,I shall launch the world's supply of nukes toward it,if it survives the nuke blitzkrieg or the death beam,I'll summon a white and platinum invincible version of the robot to stall the current version while I escape to a different timeline.
edited 25th Jul '12 9:20:18 AM by XiphosOrochi666
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