Hey
Um... Uh... It can't be killed! What am I supposed to do!?
I die for some unexplained reason.
The next poster is playing Scribblenauts.
edited 25th Jan '11 5:02:56 PM by Slouch
To Object or Not Object?
I write Explode and my DS explodes in my face.
The next troper is on another forum.
It's more frustrating waiting for the asskicking than the asskicking itself.
The fora here achieve sentience and kill me out of jealousy.
Next poster has resolved to never used the Internet again.
This space for rent. Cost: your soul.
/b/ comes out of nowhere and kills me.
Next poster just drank the Hourai Elixir (impervious to aging, resurrect if you get killed.)
To Object or Not Object?
A black hole sucks you up right as you finish drinking it.
The next troper is discussing a who can beat who fight.
It's more frustrating waiting for the asskicking than the asskicking itself.
Your army sucks.
The debate eventually goes to "Me vs. My friend", and we decide to test it out. I end up falling on my head from a 4th floor window for my trouble.
The next poster just jailbroke his iPod.
edited 25th Jan '11 2:19:15 PM by Neo_Crimson
Sorry, I can't hear you from my FLYING METAL BOX!
I have seen the amateur, and it is me.
The sandvich is Russian. You know damn well what happens next.
Next troper is dancing an Irish jig.
edited 26th Jan '11 4:59:56 PM by AwesomeZombie22
Usually here.
I suffer a heart attack and die.
Next poster is alternate JFK. You just killed Lee Harvey Oswald by clubbing him to death with his own gun.
Show an affirming flame
...whereupon the gun promptly discharges. Into my neck. Because witnesses can't see much of the action, there is much suspicion that there was, in fact, a "second gunman", leading to the Warren Commission, lots of conspiracy theories, LBJ, and so forth.
The next poster is remote-piloting a UAV over a city.
edited 26th Jan '11 11:57:00 AM by SabresEdge
Charlie Stross's cheerful, optimistic predictions for 2017, part one of three.The UAV's suddenly hit with a missile! The ensuing electronic confusion generates a feedback loop in the controls causing them to explode in my face.
The next poster just shot down a UAV flying over their city.
This space for rent. Cost: your soul.
I was in a small room and the backblast of my rocket launcher killed me.
Next poster is alternate alternate Abraham Lincoln, you have just survived John Wilkes Boothe's attempted assassination after his gun failed to go off, and you have just cut him down with a sabre.
It turns out that John Wilkes Booth was only there to catch me off guard so that the vampires could attack and kill me. They knew they stood no chance unless I was distracted.
The next poster is holding a cup of water
edited 26th Jan '11 4:37:47 PM by Siranae
It is 54256 degrees. I asplode.
Next poster is a sentient black hole.
I absorb a sun, and screaming about my fate, I explode upon making contact with that sun.
The next poster was out on a walk in the park, and there's hardly anything to get in your way.
edited 26th Jan '11 4:43:37 PM by EarlOfSandvich
I now go by Graf von Tirol.
Voted best hair
![[up]](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/smiles/arrow_up.png "[up]"){kind=icon}
I spill it on a electric cord electrocute myself.
A tree falls on me.
The next poster watches TV.
edited 26th Jan '11 4:44:22 PM by megamagikarp
Based on what?
Hypnotoad is on TV, he tells me to jump out the window. I happen to be on the top floor of a skyscraper.
The next poster finds a rubber band on the ground
I trips a landmine, I 'splode.
Next poster is a ghost. Exorcism does not work and there are no Ghost Busters.
I possess a bear and use it to kill my murderer. Now I can rest in peace.
The next poster is wearing a hat
edited 26th Jan '11 5:38:52 PM by Siranae
Unreasonably Quirky
The hat is actually a deadly parasitic alien and it sucks out my brain.
The next poster is playing pattycake with Jack Black.
edited 26th Jan '11 6:17:13 PM by TyeDyeWildebeest
I love to learn, I love to yearn, and most of all... I love to make money.
Hey
I bring up a movie he regrets starring in and tease him about it.
Then he 'accidentally' claps too hard, breaks off hy hands, and beat me to death with them.
The next poster is ordering calimari at a restaurant.
edited 27th Jan '11 1:20:15 AM by Slouch
Das kann doch nicht sein!
It's a little bit too fresh and it strangles me with it's tentacles.
The next poster is on a Rammstein concert.
edited 27th Jan '11 4:22:50 AM by Nyarly
People aren't as awful as the internet makes them out to be.
Unreasonably Quirky
Naturally, I die in the mosh pit.
The next poster is on a date with a sweet Southern Belle
I love to learn, I love to yearn, and most of all... I love to make money.
I get the death penalty for murder in the 1st degree.
Next poster is SCP-682.