Funny / SporeWiki Fiction Universe

The SporeWiki Fiction Universe, while most of the time serious, does have it's handful of funny moments.

• The Loron. Where do we start?
  • Da Propa Big Rogue Krooza is notorious for having "pizza buttons" located near it's missile launchers. When questioned about it, the Loron said that most of buttons on the spaceship are actually "pizza buttons".
  • Fre'kloar taunting King Thylaxiz was an entire section of laugher, where he continuously forgot which Devourer's Chosen Champion had which mind power, refered to Regnatus as Thylaxiz's "godfatha", and shaked his butt to Thylaxiz to taunt him. The worst of all is that it worked just as Fre'kloar intended.
    Fre'kloar: COM AT ME BRO. IM GONNA MAKE YOO SAD...no wait IM GONNA MAKE YOO BORED...or was it angry? or crazy?...fuk so many champions i dun kno all dese powas LOOK YOR JUS GONNA DAI OK?
  • During the very first fight between Zr'Ahgloth and Fre'kloar, the two delivered mighty blows against each other, including various kicks and punches. And then Fre'kloar just poked Zr'Ahgloth's eye.
  • The famous "banana gun". A spacetime defect which can take the form of anything, it usually takes the form of a normal banana peel. Imagine having a spaceship battle when a mere banana peel causes an explosion powerful enough to level an entire planet to the ground. As almost all characters to interact with the Loron are aliens and as such don't know what a real banana is, their reactions are expecially funny.
    Kerella Dacia: What in all the endless forests was THAT?
  • Recently empowered by the Isio'Nar, Sarec gained a dreaded reputation among the Loron after zapping a group of them in the bum.
  • When trying to show an image in a monitor to the Polar Crystal Alliance during the Borealis War, Fre'kloar literally teared the monitor out of the wall and put it in the Alliance's screen. Fre'kloar complained on how it was not working, then whined about how that had already happened that week.
  • The Rogue Loron Warbosses and Leedas flee from the Alliance trying to kill them...only to be found on a forest camp, surrounding a campire and singing a mocking of the Campfire Song.
  • Admiral Tul of the United Lanat Empire tricking the Loron mercenary Gol'thabex into a job by offering him "half of nothing". Not only Gol'thabex started counting on his fingers, but he later accepted the offer gleerfully.
    • Any number big enough will cause the Loron to comment that it's "ova a dozen" and therefore it's a large amount, even when it's not.
  • After defeating GroxOttz King, the Alliance group boarding the AI's spaceship is about to leave, when the Draconis soldier Corteus suggesting taking something as a souvenir while they're still there. Cue to the Loron warboss Drizz'pyrokirk tearing part of the wall off and putting it on his head like a hat.
    Drizz'pyrokirk: hurhurhur i liek it
    Zr'Ahgloth: mate. it dunt suit yoo
• The Wedding of Tyraz Breek and Iovera Eoleina had some particularly humerous moments.
  • When Kithworto noticed that Kezoreg and Septis - The children of Tyraz and Uriel respectively - were fighting, he threw a bolt of energy in order to distract them and split them up. Kezoreg simply glared back but Septis, being still a young boy and new to such magic, jerked at the imapct with such shock he almost wet himself.
  • Uriel offers Apollo some wine grown from his personal vineyard. Apollo took a sip but tried his best to hide how he didn't like it. He then politely said he and Gianne only drink on special occasions, with Gianne in the background gulping down a bottle.
    • Gianne spent the rest of her evening drunk off her ass, falling on the kids' table.
  • Kara was bored out of her mind throughout the entire ceremony and reception. It didn't help that at one point she saw Kezoreg picking his nose in full view of everyone. She was not pleased.
    • When Septis noticed, He told Kezoreg a story his mother told him that if he keeps picking he'll pull out his brain.
    Kezoreg: Really? Awesome!
• The nature of the comments Soredus' made to the Mechanic as attempts to draw his fire (and the reactors he was standing in front of), you can't help but wonder if he was secretly gaining pleasure from mocking the old Caretaker.

  Soredus: You're a worse shot than a rookie at boot camp!

  The Mechanic: I had training in shooting for years...YOU TAKE THAT BACK!!!

  Soredus: Hah! Make me. Go on, prove me wrong!

  Mechanic misses and destroys another core.

  Soredus: Decrepit little tin-man, can't hit the broadside of a titan!

  The Mechanic: ARGH!!!!

• Ever since Agent Nu opened his mouth he has delivered one hilariously inappropriate comment after another. Chief of them being his ideas of using the Xhodocto to solve every problem. Generally forgetting that not only would the problem army be dead, but so would everyone else.
  • When Kithworto saw an enormous sculpture of the Draconis dragon god he used the phrase "it looks like something Nu would blow up" as a compliment.
• While the Iron Fist is being destroyed by Kolossus and Antagonar, Veroniel promises Hachiman a first kiss so long as they die afterwards (which looks rather certain so she gives him a firm peck). But wait: the lights come back on, they don't die and we see Veroniel crying in a corner while Hachi is ecstatic and jumping for joy.
  Arkarixus: This is not right. Not right at all.
• Whenever a new Spore-created screenshot is shown on the IRC, there is a 50-50 chance that at least one user will notice something or see it from an angle that completely destroys the intended context. Hilarity usually ensues and it haappens more frequently when characters are the main focus.
• On the story Distant Planet, Agent Nu wakes up after being knocked down by Sarec. He immediately mumbles about having a nightmare where Hachiman and Agent Tau were dressing him up.
• Tantummodo Mortem brought us the Kroogvont legionnaire Grukarb. His attitude by itself made him a fan favorite.

  Dreamy Angazhar: All in your possession is ours. You belong to us.

  Grukarb: This antimatter grenade belongs up your arsehole mate!

  • Grukarb's reaction to the bizarre size of the Nightmare Region.
    Grukarb: So basically Carmetego was so big you could fit solar systems in his arse-crack?

• When the team find Hachi conversing with the head of a mad Kicath emperor, Hachi is genuinely excited to see the team. The head however was screaming along the lines of "make him stop!"
• After returning to Kithworto's apartment after a long trek through Insomnia, Arkarixus emerged from Kithworto's bedroom and struggled desperately to explain to Kithworto that nothing at all happened on his bed as Kalcedia spreads herself seductively across it.

• According to Mithra, whatever the golden water that flows all around her palace contains, it can bypass the Never Gets Drunk part of being Descended. As she has often seen Kragh try it and is either shouting at walls or cuddling with Vetarion soon after.
• When Mithra was born, her brothers and sister each took turns to say hello. When it's Vetarion's turn, baby Mithra throws up a little on his finger. Naturally, he flails about in disgust but tosses some of the vomit on Kragh. Which sets off such a volcanic Berserk Button that Kragh smashes down the door in order to chase his brother down.

  Kragh: Come Back so I can play Skoggan [rugby] with your head!

  • We don't exactly see the playout of a bet made between Kragh and Yarda in how many women Kragh could draw in. Years later, Vetarion drops that Kragh utterly failed in his efforts, losing several thousand in Dominion currency to his sister.
• When the team put together to rescue Tyraz from an alternate universe includes a Cloud Cuckoolander and a Hormone-Addled Teenager you know hilarity is due to ensue
  • After being accidentally teleported into a container of stored meat, Jerkon accidentlly attracts the notice of a pair of Draconizane soldiers. It takes him a good few minutes to realise the pair outside are actually people that could kill him. When Jerkon takes audible offence to being called brain-damaged in a discussion as to whether the person in the container is alive or dead, this soldier proposes a zombie that thinks itself still alive. When Jerkon realises what's going on he plays up being a zombie. Leading this same soldier to then wonder why a zombie would pretend to be a zombie.
    Soldier 2 - Why would a zombie pretend to be a zombie?
    Soldier 1 - It's a living alien then.
    Soldier 2 - Or... it's a chameleon zombie!
  • Jerkon's lot didn't improve afterward. In order to move about the ship unnoticed, the plan included hiding Jerkon naked within a pile of the container's meat mounted on a grav-sled. Not in order to avoid arousing suspicion, but because Jerkon smelled horrific.
    • Becomes a minor Running Gag as the group spend the journey to the kitchen contemplating how to make him not smell. When they do get there, they almost forget he was in the pile they were shifting.
  • When they get the door to the captain's quarters open, Hachi suggests looking for any kind of information as to where the ship is going or where Tyraz was being held while he looked though the captain's dresser. When he opens a drawer full of bras his first instinct is to bury his face in it.
  • Needing to steal a guard's PDA, Sarec asks Koluap to make a distraction. Cue the Spinker (transformed to look like a Draonizane) falling on the floor, shouting about how clumsy he is and getting in the guard's face about what he does to people who look at him weird.
  • Koluap mentioning how breasts repulse him moments before describing at length about how large Iovera's are.
  • While evacuating a ship now under attack by Kordan's dreadnought, the team rescuing Tyraz from his clutches run into Koluap who rushes out of the armoury with his biggest priority being that his tail is on fire.