Funny / Sawbones

• Justin’s complete and total disgust in “Self-Experimentation” for Sydnee’s stories about Max Joseph von Pettenkofer drinking cholera and John Hunter intentionally giving himself gonorrhea.
  Justin: This show is supposed to be safe for children! This show isn't safe for anybody!
  Sydnee: (through laughter) I'm not using profanity...
  Justin: Yeah, you are, you're using emotional profanity! Visual profanity, that's what you're doing to me!
• In the live episode about Pliny the Elder:
  • Sydnee makes a rather dated reference:
    Sydnee: ...And Pliny could tell you, because he wrote down all the trees. He wrote down all the trees, and all the rocks, and all the—all the plants, all the animals. He wrote about space, he wrote about humans, he wrote about history, he wrote about anything. It was everything. It was the, like, Encarta, maybe of their time?
    Justin: Hold. On. The. Phone. If it—if that's the Encarta of his time, what's the Encarta of our time? Because it ain't Encarta. What?! That entire brand name has been relegated to windbreakers from the mid-90s. "I worked on Encarta!" Good. Congratulations. You shipped a fine product, sold a lot of disks. Encarta?! You know about Wikipedia, I've seen you on it! Encarta?!
    Sydnee: (laughing) ...I don't still have that disk.
  • Sydnee announces that she's prepared a song in Pliny's honor:
    Sydnee: ...Where's your guitar?
    Justin: Uhhhhhhh... (makes a fart noise) Um, I know you told me to bring it...it's so heavy. It's so heavy.
    Sydnee: I wrote this whole song about Pliny.
    Justin: Uh, hold on, I got—wait, hold on. (pause) I got you. I got my Anna and Elsa cup here.
    Sydnee: You have a cup?
    Justin: My Anna and Elsa cup.
    Sydnee: What are you gonna do with that cup?
    Justin: Stole it from Charlie.
    Sydnee: What is your plan with this cu—oh no. Rileigh taught him how to do this.
    Justin: (starts playing "The Cup Song")
• While most of “Eugenics” is pretty depressing, one bright spot is Justin insisting that Gregor Mendel was trying to make peas “do it”.
• During “Vasectomies”, Sydnee relates the story of Eugen Steinach, a physiologist who believed that vasectomies made roosters and rats more virile. Justin does an impression of him:
  Justin: “Hey, uh, hey Daryl, come over here for a second. Does that—look at that one rat. No, the other one. Yeah. Does—is it just me, or does he look ready to party?
• "A Medicine Called Christmas" is an Affectionate Parody of Hallmark Christmas movies, following their basic plot of "Woman from the big city goes to a small town to learn what Christmas is all about", and manages to get plenty of laughs out of it:
  • Our female lead, played by Sydnee, is named Tabitha Bigcity.
  • Tabitha's dad, Daniel Bigcity (played by Tommy Smirl, Sydnee's father) is explaining why he's sending her to the small town for the doctor exchange program (which is "a real thing that exists and people do"):
    Tabitha: Dad, I know everything I need to know about Crittenmond.
    Daniel: Christmas, Tabitha. It's called Christmas.
    Tabitha: Right, Christmas, whatever, fine. What's the name of this quaint village you're banishing me to, again?
    Daniel: Well, the locals call it Poinsettia Point.
    (Beat)
    Tabitha: Is that what it's really called? Or...
    Daniel: No, it's--it's really called that.
  • Tabitha meets the leading man, Chris Evergreen (played by Justin) outside the Poinsettia Point family clinic:
    Chris: (yelling) Money for charity! Please give money for Christmas!
    Tabitha: Uh, excuse me. I'm looking for—
    Chris: A great way to help those less fortunate than you?
    Tabitha: W—well, sort of. I'm supposed to be working at the Poinsettia Point family clinic today?
    Chris: Oh, sure, I can help, no problem. That'll be five dollars, please!
    Tabitha: What? (holding back laughter) Five dollars? God, what kinda scam are you runnin' here?
    Chris: The Christmas kind? For poor people?
    Tabitha: Ohh, right, okay. I'm sorry. Well—I only have a $20.
    Rachel McElroy, narrating: There is a two-minute-long pause.
    Chris: I'll spot you.
  • Tabitha explains her tragic, Christmas-hating backstory:
    Tabitha: I don't know...I guess it was just never a big deal for our family. Dad always volunteered to work Christmas Day, and my mom was allergic to trees.
    Chris: (sympathetically) Ohhh.
    Tabitha: Also, my Gamgam was the one who always went all out for Christmas, and when she died it just never felt the same.
    Chris: Okay. So which—
    Tabitha: And my mom let my dad for a mall Santa on...
    Chris: On—on Christmas?
    Tabitha: Arbor Day.
• During the "Pinworms" live show, Justin gives an introduction to the episode:
  Justin: So the problem...we sometimes cover some challenging topics on Sawbones. And the problem with doing that in a podcast setting is, if people get skeeved out, totally wigged out and grossed out, they can turn the podcast off. (beat) You're on a boat.
• For whatever reason, New Orleans fans apparently love yellow fever, as heard in the live episode "The First Pharmacist".
  Justin: Fan favorite yellow fever!
• From “Vagina Shaming”, this discussion:
  Sydnee: Uh, there were beliefs in the ancient world that people who had vaginas were thought to have more moisture in their body in general, and less heat. Because you had less moisture and more heat, then you would’ve...grown...
  Justin: [hesitantly] Grown a penis?
  Sydnee: ...a penis? Gotten a penis? Been gifted a penis.
  Justin: They didn’t think through that one, yeah.
  Sydnee: Um, but because of this, all of your organs sort of stayed inside. Like, crammed up in there, instead of dropping down to what was considered the perfect state. The final...evolution. [starts laughing] Of the—of the Pokémon that is our genitalia.
  Justin: [laughing]
  Sydnee: Is the penis. And the scrotum.
  Justin: [gasping laughter]
  Sydnee: The v—the vulva, the vagina...the uterus, the ovaries, all of that was, like, a lesser stage...of evolution.
  Justin: Can I just—do you mind if I text Griffin while we’re recording and ask? ‘Cause I feel like he would’ve had a really good Pokémon name for the final evolution.
• In the live show "Coffee," Justin leads the episode into a long digression about how exactly self-administered coffee enemas work. Syndee mostly maintaining a deadpan throughout is what really makes it.
  Sydnee: (regarding Justin laying down and having her show him and the audience the logistics of positioning and so on) I did not anticipate this.