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Funny / Hawkeye

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  • Whenever the skirt is mentioned, especially when it's Kate Bishop, unaware that she's talking to Clint, saying that she never dressed like the first Hawkeye—even when he wore a skirt. Clint's response?
    Years later and people still make fun of the skirt...
  • Hawkeye's reaction to finding out that he and the other Avengers have been transported to a reality that never left the middle ages and is ruled by a powerful sorceress? "Aw man, not another alternate universe!"
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  • Back when Daredevil's blindness was a secret, Hawkeye attempted to use a phosphorus arrow to blind him. Daredevil doesn't react until he notices Hawkeye's confusion and notices the scent of the chemicals and pieces together Clint's intention. Matt then proceeds to oversell the pain he's supposed to be in.
  • From his current ongoing series:
    • Several scattered Daily Bugle papers are titled with the headlines "EVERYTHING AWFUL: Oh God Somebody Do Something!!"
      • Chris Eliopoulos, the letterer of Vol. 4, keeps putting these in, along with all the Unsound Effect's and other Painting the Medium gags. It's what elevates the title as a whole.
    • Kate and Clint get into an argument over the labeling and organization of his arrows, or lack there of. She harps on him about this, even during a car chase with gangsters firing at them, causing him to yell at her to pick one at random.
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    • After saving a girl from gangsters and subsequently sleeping with her, the gangsters track them down and starts firing at a still naked Hawkeye. He dodges the gunfire and dives across the room. His Censor Box is a picture of his old mask.
    • After getting knocked out by the above mentioned gangsters, Hawkeye calls Kate to pick him up. By the time she gets to his location, he's still putting his pants and shirt on. Kate stares at him for several panels, causing him to facepalm.
    • A gangster holds Clint hostage with Kate aiming her bow at the gangster.
      Gangster: You geev me ginger (derogatory patriarchial epithet), I geev you Avenger (slang for male genitalia).
      Kate: Wow, the mouth on you.
    • The Dog Cops subplot/Running Gag in issue 6. Hawkeye watching a show like that? Okay. Spider-Man? Definitely. Wolverine? Freaking hysterical.
      • Especially since Dog Cops appears to be, literally, a show about dogs who are cops, rather than, say, a K-9 unit; Tony refers to a character named "Sergeant Whiskers" when talking to Clint about it.
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    • Kate talking about how the Roman emperor Domitian could fire 4 arrows at once between his fingers (while Clint is shown shooting only 3 off), then later on Kate fires off 5 arrows at once.
      Kate: Suck it, Domitian.
    • Bit from #6:
      (A load of Slavic tracksuit bros come out from two vans, proceeding to overwhelm him with baseball bats)
      Clint: (agonizing) Yyyyyeah. Guh. Guh. Guys. Guys, better go gessomemore guys.
      (They get back to beating him into unconsciousness. When Clint wakes up, he's loaded into one of the vans with a bag over his head, later being unmasked while tied to a chair in a large room filled with bros)
      Clint: Great! You got more guys.
    • Clint insisting to his neighbors that he's not an Avenger...only to be interrupted by SHIELD agents air-dropping onto his roof, hooking him up, and airlifting him into a Helicarrier, all while Clint protests that they have the wrong guy.
    • In a meta example this tweet from Matt Fraction, in which he implies that the volume will end with all of the cast except Lucky dying and Lucky eating their bodies.
  • Recent issue of Secret Avengers brought us, after being trapped in Earth 666, surrounded by undead Avengers thanks to Captain Britain leaving a powerful artifact in their hands, Clint gets into rant mode, in a way to leave even the most British of readers laughing, followed by classic Clint Barton dialog.
    Clint: I hate you Captain Britain. From now on, because of you bringing me here, I will now hate everything about Britain. Tea. The Smiths. The Queen.
    Brian: Let's leave the Smiths out of this.
    Clint: God, I hate other dimensions. Way too Doctor Who for me. Feels like fighting fake stuff.
    Monster!Hawkeye: We're real enough.
    Brian: Lets test that out the old fashioned way-
    Clint: -WITH VIOLENCE!
    • Later, Clint gets his Ho Yay working:
      Brian: You think juggling some Avengers is tough work? Try policing the Entire Omniverse!
      Clint: Someone feeling underapreciated? I cherish you, Captain Britain, and you look so pretty in that new suit.
      Brian: I was worried about using too much black.
      Clint: No, it's slimming.
    • Basically, every bit with these two really in the latest arc.
  • From the second volume of Secret Avengers comes Clint telling Natasha that he and Bobbi can work well together and their relationship is behind them, only for Natasha to be revealed to be Bobbi using camotech.
    • Even better—Clint's reaction strongly suggests that this isn't the first time he's fallen for Bobbi wearing the camotech and pretending to be someone else.
  • The solicit for Hawkeye (Vol.4) #15 includes the line, "Plus... two free staples!"
  • One story arc begins with various mythical creatures appearing all over the world, attacking all Avengers. We only see short snippets of each fight, and this is (paraphrased) how it goes for Clint...
    Minotaur-looking creature: You will DIE by the horns of MUTAURUS!
    Clint: See, I have this thing about not getting killed by people with INCREDIBLY STUPID NAMES!
  • This exchange between Clint and Steve Rogers during Avengers: Endless Wartime:
    Clint: This is Clint Barton. I might be late.
    Steve: Shake a leg. We have one meeting a week. Get here.
    Clint: I might be lost.
    Steve: I don't believe you.
    Clint: I might also be in a dumpster.
    Steve: I believe you.
    Clint: There was a girl. And some people who hit me.
    Steve: Tell it to the chaplain, Hawkeye. Get here.
    Clint: YOU ARE OLD.
  • In the non-canon Gwenpool Holiday Special, Hawkeye tells Red Skull to think of a happy memory and then go @#$% himself. Clint gets eaten by a shark launched by the Skull but it was Worth It.
  • The first time that Bobbi met Clint, she beats him in a fight. With ease. And ends up straddling him with her battle staves against his throat.

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