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Drinking Game / The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim

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Ready your tankards and drinking horns, my brother Nords, for only the strong of heart and liver can handle this Drinking Game!note 

Take a swig of mead whenever one of the following happens in The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim:


  • You hear one of the following linesProtip :
    • "I used to be an adventurer like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee..."
    • "Let me guess - someone stole your sweetroll..."
    • "No lollygaggin'."
    • "Wait... I know you..."
    • "Some may call this junk. Me, I call them treasure."
    • "Trinkets, odds and ends, that sort of thing."
    • "Looking to protect yourself, or deal some damage?"
    • "That spell looks dangerous... keep your distance."
    • "Do you get to the Cloud District very often? Oh, what am I saying... of course you don't."
      • Finish the bottle if you get sick of it and kill him.
      • Finish a second bottle if you use console commands to resurrect and kill him again.
    • "Never should have come here..."
    • "So you wish to master the arcane arts..."
    • "Skyrim for the Nords!"
    • "You know,if you've got the aptitude, you should join the College of Winterhold..."
    • "Fresh fish!"
    • "You know what's wrong with Skyrim these days? Everyone is obsessed with death!"
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    • "Well, well! Another maggot to squash beneath my boot!"
    • "Another wanderer, here to lick my father's boots. Good job."
    • "You and me...we're the only ones in this city who aren't complete fools."
    • "My favorite drinking buddy!" (also drink an in-game beverage if you're not playing a teetotaler).
    • "Need something?"
  • You end up over-encumbered.
    • Another if your follower is already too encumbered to hold any of your stuff, so you have to eat all your food or ingredients, or drop stuff.
  • Down the tankard if you encounter the ghost of the headless horseman.
  • A dragon randomly appears in the game world.
    • Take another sip if it was during a really inconvenient time.
    • Take one more sip for every time it kills someone.
    • Also take another sip if it manages to kill you.
      • Down the rest of the tankard if it does a Finishing Move kill on you when you had more than 50% of your health left.
      • Likewise, down the whole thing if you get a Finishing Move kill on the dragon.
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    • And if you downloaded the Dragonborn DLC, take another if Miraak comes and steals the dragon's soul after you kill it.
    • And another if an essential NPC kills one.
    • Drink if it flies away rather than bothering to fight, and a second if you actually wanted to fight.
      • Down the tankard if it flew away after you tagged it with Dragonrend.
    • Down the tankard when you kill it in a populated area and everyone stops what they’re doing to examine the corpse.
  • A giant blasts someone (either yourself, your follower, or a poor bystander) into space.
    • And if you're playing on the PC and downloaded Fall of the Space Core, down the tankard if it does this to the Space Core.
  • Down the tankard if you encounter M'aiq the Liar on the road.
  • You accidentally steal an item, incurring a small bounty and the wrath of everyone in the vicinity.
    • Down the tankard if you killed a chicken and everyone's on your case.
    • Down the tankard if that item is a horse, in the middle of a Imperial/Stormcloack camp.
  • Something glitchy happens, whether amusing or game-breaking.
  • A Draugr disarms you.
    • Drink again if you can't find your weapon.
  • A Draugr ragdolls you with Unrelenting Force.
    • Drink again if you both used Unrelenting Force, blowing each other away.
    • DO NOT do this while fighting Sigdis Gaulderson. You'll probably need a new liver.
  • Somebody badmouths the other side in the Civil War.
    • For a meta portion of the game: Drink if a fan of the game is attacking the other side.
  • Fantastic Racism is either mentioned or shown.
    • Another if it's directed at you.
  • Your follower does something stupid.
    • Take another one if they trigger an obvious trap you were trying to avoid. Chug until the game finishes reloading if that trap kills you.
    • Take another if your follower gets in the way of the door you are trying to get past.
  • You are confronted with a Sadistic Choice anywhere in the game.
  • Someone attempts to rob you, challenge you on the street, etc.
  • You encounter a bear or sabre cat.
    • Down the tankard if that animal manages to overpower a dragon.
  • If you've downloaded the Dawnguard DLC:
    • Take a sip for every time vampires ambush you on the road.
      • Or every time the Dawnguard ambush you on the road.
      • Or every time vampires make you load an earlier save because they killed shopkeepers. Down the tankard if it also made a quest fail.
      • Or every time a vampire labeled as a "Traveler" appears in a hold and begins trying to kill you. Prepare to see him a lot if you’re playing on the Switch.
    • Take a sip if the guards say this: "Heard they're reforming the Dawnguard! Vampire hunters or something. In the old fort near Riften. Might consider joining up myself!"
    • Take a sip if you encounter Vampires disguised as civilians or Vigilants of Stendarr.
    • Take a sip if Serana complains about the weather. Better finish the DLC quick before your liver packs in.
  • Cicero or the Spectral Assassin says something annoying.
  • The Courier ambushes you in a remote place.
  • Have one shot for every Daedric Prince that claims your soul.
    • Have another if they forced you into helping them.
  • Take a shot if, upon entering any town, a dragon immediately appears.
  • Every time you walk into a room filled with sarcophagi and Draugr 'ambush' you.
  • Take a swig anytime Marcurio says something snarky.
  • Take a drink when you cannot fast travel because enemies are nearby.
    • Take another drink if it turns out to be a mudcrab or slaughterfish.
  • Down the tankard if you're at the College of Winterhold, and it's not snowing outside.
  • Take a drink if you make a potion/poison with effects that nobody could ever want combined (healing/damaging, for example) just because it's worth more.
  • You mix alchemy ingredients together while experimenting and fail to create anything.
  • You shoot an arrow into your follower.
    • Or if they run into your offensive spell. Or if they run into your Shout.
    • Empty the tankard if you end up killing them.
  • Enemies act like morons while you riddle them with arrows while sneaking.
  • You hear Jarl Balgruuf's voice actor again.
  • You hear Mercer Frey's voice actor again.
  • Take a drink when you lose track of your horse. Two if it doesn't reappear when you fast travel.
  • Take a drink whenever someone does a cinematic kill on you. Two if you would have survived the hit otherwise.
    • Down the tankard if you were at full health.
  • Take a swig for every lockpick you break trying to open a door or chest.
    • Down the tankard if the contents of the chest turn out to be worth less than the lockpicks you spent opening it.
  • You discover a new location where the ground is strewn with corpses and/or skeletons.
  • Take a drink every time a new port of Skyrim is announced. Take a second one if Todd Howard himself is delivering the news.
  • If you choose to mod the game for the first time, take a drink whenever the game randomly crashes to desktop.
  • If you run into a pack of hired thugs.
  • With the Hearthfire DLC installed, every time you visit your homestead and find a pack of marauding bandits/attacking monsters/a giant, or if you find skeevers in the basement.
    • Finish the drink if the enemies kill one of your homestead NPCs.

Hey! Wake up, you drunken blasphemer!

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