Weapon Brown versus Alley Oop
"I've got a lot of names, depending on who you ask. I'll let you call me Chuck."
"I kill for a living. There's a lot of guys in my line of work, and they're all cheaper than me. If all you want is to put a hole in somebody, you hire one of them."
"But if you want to take out a tank crew of battle-hardened scum and fall asleep knowing they died screaming —"
"You call good ol' Weapon Brown."—Chuck "Weapon" Brown
It is years after the last war, and the world has ended.
The fighting, though,
that still continues.
Surviving — no,
thriving — in this world is "Weapon" Brown, a cybernetic mercenary with absolutely no pity and balls that could crack diamonds. Together with his man-eating dog Snoop, they eke out a living as a pair of mercenaries. If you want something done to someone, don't need any questions answered, and absolutely
need to make sure the poor bastards suffer, you call Weapon Brown.
In other words,
Weapon Brown is
Peanuts, only set
After the End and
Grim Darker than
Warhammer 40000. Filled with great art and
Shout Outs to just about every syndicated comic out there,
Weapon Brown Needs More Love.
The comic started out as a side project to cartoonist, Jason Yungbluth's, comic,
Deep Fried. The first Weapon Brown story was called
A Peanut Scorned, and was originally included as a bonus in the printed versions of issues 1-4 of
Deep Fried. It starts off by telling the origin story of Charles "Weapon" Brown, and sequences into his quest to save his red-haired girlfriend from his insane former friend, Linus van Pelt, who plans to use her in his attempt to finally summon The Great Pumpkin, all while he runs into other characters from the
Peanuts universe.
Yungbluth would eventually shift gears, and made Weapon Brown his main focus. Having already used the characters from
Peanuts, he decided to widen the scope, and include elements and characters from just about every newspaper strip out there, in order to make the bigger and more epic follow-up,
Blockhead's War, from which four issues are already done, while the fifth is currently estimated to be completed at some point in 2012.
It can be read at
http://www.whatisdeepfried.com/
, starting
Here. It is most certainly
Not Safe for Work, with nudity, sex, and
Gorn.
This comic shows examples of: - Animals Lack Attributes: Averted with Snoop and HOBS.
- Anti-Hero: Good ol' Weapon Brown.
- After the End: "The Last War", which more or less ended human civilization.
- Animesque: Huey and Riley Freeman are half-Japanese.
- April Fools' Day: In one strip, Chuck and Crokk are revealed to be Beepo and Roadkill, the main characters from Deep Fried, in rubber suits.
- Berserk Button: Don't hurt Snoop. Weapon will not be pleased.
- Annie knows one of Brown's actual buttons an invitation to play football from the first story she uses it to make him have rough sex with her. As in he's got his gun to her head rough.
- Big Damn Heroes: A Big Damn Dog Army!
- Bittersweet Ending: Snoop stays with Annie; Jeffy joins Chuck to destroy The Syndicate and avenge his family; Chuck notes that since the world has a second chance there'll be things worth fighting for again. The "strange shadow" Chuck sees spreading out over Bone City is the schmoo from the exploded Garf, which is turning into vegetation, bringing life back to the wasteland.
- Black Comedy
- Bond One-Liner
- Chest Burster: How CAL kills the Garf.
- Christmas Special: Merry Christmas, Blockheads.
- Halloween Episode: Linus (and about a hundred other guys) uses Sally's body to summon the Great Pumpkin but only succeeds in getting "The Cold Ones" (three spirits based on the non-/mutant Bedsheet Ghost costumes in the original Great Pumpkin), who reveal that Sally was too in love with Linus during the "ceremony" and the Great Pumpkin requires fear.
- Cold-Blooded Torture: Brown does not outright kill the people that have REALLY gotten themselves on his bad side. He wants to hear them beg continuously for it first.
- Crapsack World
- Dagwood Sandwich: Here and here.
- Darker and Edgier: As many syndicated comic strips as possible, although it started with just "Peanuts".
- Death by Irony: Cal fears and hates women thanks to Van Pelt's "conditioning". When he gains control of the schmoo it turns against him when it takes the form of Slimy girlS that he can't Get Rid Of.
- Death by Sex: Miss Buckley. Averted with Annie.
- Determinator: "Weapon" Brown
- Died Standing Up: The expy of The Phantom gets his head blown clean off. Not only does he die standing, he becomes the corpse that walks!
- Evil Counterpart/Evil Knockoff: CALv1n and HOBS are sort of this for Chuck and Snoop. Of course, Chuck isn't exactly good...
- Family Unfriendly Death: Almost too many to count, but the most notable ones are probably Croc getting dismembered, brutally tortured and finally has a flamethrower shoved up his ass and fired, and CAL-v.1N getting fed the Schmoo until he explodes.
- Fan Disservice: Chuck battles the Neanderthal savage Alley Oop. You know that big hairy patch over Alley Oop's crotch? It's not a loincloth. My eyes.
- Hollywood Cyborg: Chuck.
- Fanservice: Miss Bucksley, the late Honey Huan, and possibly Anne, if she didn't have eyes like that thing in Splice.
- Faux Affably Evil: CALv1n in spades.
- Funetik Aksent: Displayed by a fair number of characters, but taken to extremes with Hilda.
- "Dalab! Brakka glazz! Brakit ffurritseez ennamore!" The lab! Break the glass! Break it before it sees any more!
- Fun with Acronyms: Cyber Augmented Legionnaire - version 1 N and his Heuristically Optimized Bonding Surrogate; U.S. Agro-Commerce Research & Engineering Station.
- Future Badass: Just about every character who was a child in their own comic has grown up into a post-apocalyptic asskicker.
- Except for those becoming monsters. The Katzenjammer kids are impersonating Kuato from the original Total Recall (1990).
- Future Food Is Artificial: Schmoo. You really don't want to know what it is.
- Gone Horribly Wrong (or maybe Gone Horribly Right): CAL-v1.N.
- He-Man Woman Hater: Cal does not like women. If you were "conditioned" by Van Pelt you'd probably develop a phobia too.
- The Hedonist: Duke. He does not seem to care about the fact that he is having sex and taking drugs during the business meetings with the other members of the Syndicate. Then again, neither do they.
- Hotter and Sexier: Amongst other things, "Mint" Patty and Marcy are bisexuals in a BDSM relationship. Surprisingly, given what happened to her boyfriend, post-apocalyptic Olive Oyle looks pretty good (and surprisingly curvy). Or rather, looked.
- Impaled with Extreme Prejudice: HOBS. On a souped-up Zamboni.
- Infant Immortality: Averted with (most of) The Family Circus.
- Klingon Promotion: Horns (aka the Pointy Haired Boss) becomes chairman of the Syndicate this way by defenestrating Mr. Dithers.
- La Résistance
- Lawyer-Friendly Cameo: Loads.
- Leaning on the Fourth Wall: The witch Hilda knows that Snoop can understand her. Why? Because she can see his thought bubbles, which even the readers can't see.
- Loud of War: Loud music was used to torture Chuck Brown. Even better, it's by Deathtöngue.
- MacGuffin: Miss Bucksley's genetically enhanced breast milk.
- Oh, if only that's what it was. It's not. It's the Garf's excrement.
- Meaningful Name: Beetle Bailey is a disgusting bug-human hybrid.
- Nightmare Face: Beetle
- Noodle Incident: CAL-v.1N was transformed into a superhuman killing machine when an experiment called "Project Noodle" went awry. We're given just enough info about Project Noodle to know that he's a very unpleasant young man.
- Pietŕ Plagiarism: ME GOYLE!!
- Pokémon Speak: Garfield.
- Pop Goes the CAL-v.1N: GOOEY KABLOOIE!
- President Evil: Daddy Warbucks, the last president the US had before the last war, basically started the war and refused to end it, even when things got so bad that it was obvious there would be no winner. At one point, he literally called Premiere Ming, the leader of the opposite side, to the bargaining table for the sole purpose of spitting in his face. This was the "Man In The Fancy Hat" solely responsible for turning the world into a nuclear wasteland, and for what is likely to turn out to be the inevitable extinction of the entire human race. Chuck is sincerely happy to meet him, since if it weren't for him he probably wouldn't exist.
- The creepiest thing about him? He still thinks that the war is going on, and that they still have a chance to win.
- Prophet Eyes: Anne has them. What, did you think everybody has eyes like that?
- Shoot the Shaggy Dog: For the bad guys since CAL kills Garf.
- Shout Out: Oh god, hundreds.
- Stealth Pun: The monster is called the Garf. The huge boneyard it lives in is thus a Garf-field.
- Garf is also a CAT-erpillar.
- The Syndicate: The main organization of villains is actually called this, a clever pun on the fact that most newspaper comics are distributed through syndication.
- Take That: Ever notice how B.C. gradually got turned into a soapbox for its writer's religious views? Chuck certainly did.
- This Was His True Form: HOBS reverts to a cuddly toy upon death. Snoop rips his head off just to be sure.
- Vagina Dentata: SWEET BABY JESUS.
- X Meets Y: Peanuts Meets Mad Max. Yes.
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