"Saying 'no abortion, no sir-ree,
Life's too precious can't you see?'
What's that swinging from the neighbor's tree?
Well it looks like colored folks to me"
"When I am weaker than you, I ask you for freedom because that is according to your principles; when I am stronger than you, I take away your freedom because that is according to my principles."
— Unnamed philosopher
"When doing business with a religious sonofabitch, GET IT IN WRITING. His word isn't worth shit, not with the good Lord telling him how to fuck you on the deal."
"Spend time with corrupt, homicidal, Third World political figures and you hear a lot of self-pity. What kind of man throws his political enemies in prison and tortures them to death? Usually it's a guy who feels so sorry for himself that he feels justified doing anything. Killers, by and large, are whining losers. But that doesn't make them any less dangerous."
Elizabeth: But I thought Andrew Ryan was all about free markets and open competition.
All those ideas lose their luster when the quarterly earnings come in and you find out the other guy's been eating your lunch.
"God, I love the 'fine morality' of the wealthy and powerful. You'll spill tears over your own, in a heartbeat. And then never even look twice at people below you, whose lives are ground under every day, day after day, year after year. Such are beneath your contempt, aren't they?"
"Those guys've turned nasty! They used to play fair, no matter what dirty tricks we pulled!"
: We can take care
of the whole crew. It's the only way to avoid a slaughter.
Milton: ... That is a slaughter.
: Not on our end.
"We punish people who do it who aren't us."
to a graffiti artist.
Fozzie: But Kermit, what's more illegal: Briefly inconveniencing Jack Black, or destroying the Muppets?
Miss Piggy: Kermit, listen. Whatever I may think of you right now, these guys are counting on you. You inspire them.
Kermit: What, to kidnap people?
Kermit: TO KIDNAP PEOPLE!?
Mr. The Frog, we all agreed a celebrity is not a people.
Arthur: A misanthrope is one who hates humanity.
Sam: Is that what we are? Misanthropes?
Good lord, no! We're a family.
"And one more thing, all those rich fat bastards living under palm trees, all those bitches who think life's only about putting on makeup? I don't want to hear you speaking your mind from the same perspective. Nothing's worse than being treated like a whore by your own companions. I'll say this once: The next time you decide to tell me what's proper, you'll no longer be one of us. When that happens... I'm going to kill you."
"Duncan, you did seem less into integrity the day I convinced twelve of your peers that when you made that u-turn on the freeway and tried to order chalupas from the emergency call box, that your only real crime was loving America."
"If only the humans appreciated life as we do, I would not have to kill so many of them."
"...and exploded harmlessly (To me, which is what counts) on the street."
Every Highlander naturally knows something of the history of his own clan, but usually a good deal less about other clans, except that they were, in contrast to his own, of course, treacherous and bloodthirsty.
"What do you call assassins who accuse assassins?"
"It's only funny when it happens to someone else!"
Marge: Homie, are you really going to ignore Grampa for the rest of your life?
Homer: Of course not, Marge, just for the rest of HIS life. He said I was an accident... he didn't want to have me.
Marge: You didn't want to have Bart.
Homer: I know, but you're never supposed to TELL the child!
Marge: You tell Bart all the time! You told him this morning!
[Mafia Hitman Michael Sullivan asks his boss John Rooney for justice against Rooney's son, who killed Michael's family. Michael didn't get the irony of his own petition].
Michael Sullivan: He murdered Annie and Peter!
Neville: "You can't go out, you'll be caught again. Gryffindor will be in even more trouble... I won't let you do it. I'll — I'll fight you!"
Ron: "Neville, get away from that hole and don't be an idiot —"
Neville: "Don't you call me an idiot! I don't think you should be breaking any more rules! And you were the ones who told me to stand up to people!"
Ron: "Yes, but not to us."
“You have daughters,” I said.
“Two, going to universities halfway across the world.”
“And you don’t feel an iota of remorse for hurting a father through his daughter?”
“Not one,” he replied, staring me in the eye.
and Director Tagg
“How many observe Christ's birthday! How few, His precepts!”
"How is it that we hear the loudest yelps for liberty among the drivers of negroes?"
—Samuel Johnson, Taxation No Tyranny
"Imagine a sporting team that believes itself the best at its sport, but refuses to play any other team, and not only that but bars any other team from attempting to enter the stadium they either are attending or even might attend in the future and not only that but tries to make illegal for any other team to play the game at all. Now imagine that same sports team waking up one day and realizing that no one is cheering for them anymore and decrying anyone who calls that team a bunch of losers as 'anti-sports team'.
This is the essence of a white supremacist."
"Whenever I hear anyone arguing over slavery, I feel a strong impulse to see it tried on him personally."
"All for ourselves, and nothing for other people, seems, in every age of the world, to have been the vile maxim of the masters of mankind."
—Adam Smith, The Wealth of Nations
"The definition of the true savage is that he laughs when he hurts you; and howls when you hurt him."
"'Why are you killing me for your own benefit? I am unarmed.' 'Why, do you not live on the other side of the water? My friend, if you lived on this side, I should be a murderer, but since you live on the other side, I am a brave man and it is right.'"
"And we are the first to admit that anyone who knew these "good" ones [nobility] only as enemies would find them evil enemies indeed. For these same men who, amongst themselves, are so strictly constrained by custom, worship, ritual, gratitude, and by mutual surveillance and jealousy, who are so resourceful in consideration, tenderness, loyality, pride and friendship, when once they step outside their circle become little better than uncaged beasts of prey. Once abroad in the wilderness, they revel in the freedom from social constraint and compensate for their long confinement in the quietude of their own community. They revert to the innocence of wild animals: we can imagine them returning from an orgy of murder, arson, rape, and torture, jubilant and at peace with themselves."
“Our instinctive apparatus consists of two parts—the one tending to further our own life and that of our descendants, the other tending to thwart the lives of supposed rivals.”
"That the Pope could be on the side of the enemy was easily explained away by the teachers and priests. The Italians were not
really the enemy; it was all a misunderstanding. But the Germans
were the enemy, even if did go to mass, carry rosary beads and had mothers. So there was no punishment if you threw stones at Germans, oh no. Italians: innocent. Germans: guilty. Unless, of course, they could pay the piano or keep goal like Bert Trautmann of Manchester City."
"You cannot negotiate with people who say what's mine is mine and what's yours is negotiable."
"Racism is the lowest, most crudely primitive form of collectivism."
"Any white person who brought the element of civilization had the right to take over this continent."
, commencement address to West Point, 1974
"For the powerful, crimes are those that others commit.”
—Noam Chomsky, Conversations on the Post-9/11 World
"Criticizing colleagues is not what we do."
, in response to Roger Ebert labeling him a troll
: [bigoted statement] Person B
: The fuck? Person A
: Now, now, let's have civility.
"People who defend the Redskins' decision to keep their name like to cite polls that overwhelmingly support the franchise's stance. They will tell you that, like steroids in baseball, this is purely a media-driven story and that the average person doesn't care about it. And they're correct. Most people
don't care, possibly because most people are not Native Americans because we killed all the Native Americans. But I am in favor of continually harping on this team to change their name because the Redskins organization deserves to have PILES of shit thrown at them...Dan Snyder is the kind of fellow who supports the name Redskins but will happily cry anti-semitism anytime someone dares to criticize him."
"The part of this game everyone remembers is Dunta Robinson ramming a defenseless DeSean Jackson under the chinstrap with the crown of his helmet, dropping both of them like sacks of bricks to the turf for several minutes...we hear the ringleader of the Philty lowlife bunch behind us say in a loud stage whisper 'What kind of franchise allows a fucking dirtbag like that to play for them? They should take him out back and put him down like a rabid dog.' Guess whose jersey he was wearing? Andre Waters, a player so versed in the art of chop-blocking the back of quarterback's legs his fucking nickname was Dirty Waters."
"The movie argues that the hidebound and outdated rules of the church are responsible for some people (priests) not having sex although they should, while others (incestuous parents) can keep on having it although they shouldn't. For this movie to be described as a moral statement about anything other than the filmmaker's prejudices is beyond belief."
"I see this kind of hypocrisy all the time in online versions of Survivor: Someone will lie, manipulate, and backstab with the best of them, but when it happens to them, all of a sudden they find their morals and get on a soapbox. He goes on to claim there's no bitterness, but turns around and says they sold out their values, character, and friends for a stack of greenbacks. Uh, right. Explain that to Colby, Ethan, and Jerri. Frankly, in my view, if this is really life, Lex is showing HIS true character here, which is that of a poor sport."
"Lolita tells the story of Humbert Humbert, a literary scholar with two failed marriages under his belt and very cruel parents, who kidnap-adopts (kidnaps) a sexualized child ... Humbert shoots a man named Clare Quilty for kidnapping Dolores and doing weird things to her. (So ... he pretty much shoots him for plagiarism.)"
"Ah, yes, the 'Because I say so' defense! As legitimized in the famous case of
Timmy v. Mom and its landmark implications re: cookies before bed."
: I'm the good kind
of terrorist, the kind that tortures people and blows things up...wait... Alan Moore
: I'm a bloody genius!