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Kissing in a Tree
Alice and Bob are in the same class in their prep school. Alice has recently moved chairs to be closer to Bob—and Dana has figured it out.
While on break, Dana asks Alice, "You fancy Bob then?"
Alice denies it.
"Yes you do!", Dana replies, then goes into the following popular ditty
Alice and Bob, sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G
First comes love
Second comes marriage
Then comes a baby in a baby carriage!
(These days, many reverse third and second).
Rather common with the Toy Ship
, but can occur elsewhere. Basically, it's Dana figuring out that Alice/Bob exists before Bob figures it out. If it occurs with adults, the dialogue is usually more "explicit".
- Ranma ½: After Ranma makes a sarcastic remark about how Happosai should transfer into their school if he's so jealous of all the time Ryoga and Akane have been spending together to study, Happosai replies:
Happosai: Dont mind if I do, actually. Happy and Akane sittin' in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
Ranma: Why, you! Ain't cha never heard of shame?!
Genma: Apparently, not.
- In It's Kind of a Funny Story, Humble does this to the two leads, after they come into the Arts room together. Point of reference: He's a senior and they're fifteen.
- Ernest Goes To Jail: Chuck sings the tune (Ernest and Charlotte sitting in a tree) when claiming that Ernest(who is Nash wearing Ernest's clothes but not his hat)is in love.
- Greg and Rowley's classmates do this to him in The Film of the Book of Diary of a Wimpy Kid... even though they're both boys.
- In Ice Age: Continental Drift, Manny and Sid taunt Diego with this after realising he's in love with Shira.
- In Stephen King's It, a two rich kids recite the rhyme when they see Beverly and Richie together. Beverly flips them off.
- The 1980 Arthur book "Arthur's Valentine" has this happen when several of the love notes Arthur gets end up spilling out of his jacket. Many of the other schoolkids tease him about this and start singing the rhyme as Arthur retreats.
- House, Wilson and a clinic patient are watching a baseball game in an exam room when it comes up that our favourite diagnostician has a date with Cameron. Cut to House exiting the room while Wilson and the clinic patient sing: "K-I-S-S-I-N-G!"
- On The Big Bang Theory, a drunk Bernadette sang it to Amy and Sheldon, but spelled kissing "k-i-s-s-s-s-i-n-g".
- JD and Danny in Scrubs attempt a literal version of this on their first date, but lose balance and fall out.
- In an episode of Married... with Children, Kelly tried to taunt Bud with this song, but she didn't know how to spell "Kissing".
- Jaye and Erik in Wonderfalls engage in some of this before Jaye breaks up with him because she thinks that if she doesn't she'll hurt him.
- Sex and the City Carrie sings this song about Miranda and Steve at one point, though stops to correct herself that first comes baby, then comes love and marriage.
- On Gimme a Break!, when youngest daughter Samantha has her first kiss with a boy, her two sisters sing this at them.
- In the episode "Damaged" of Criminal Minds, JJ begins to sing it about Garcia and Kevin. To Prentiss' shock, Reid is clueless to its meaning.
- Warehouse 13 has one example without the singing. Pete rattles off the first two lines when he finds out that Artie has a crush on a doctor affiliated with the Warehouse. Claudia mentions Pete saying 'something about Artie and a baby carriage' when she contacts him for information while on a mission.
- During the Spike Dudley and Molly Holly romance angle in WWF in 2001, a fan held up a sign with this written on it one night.
- On a sketch from Horrible Histories that attempted to explain how WWI got started, a British Army captain tries to explain things to his men using an analogy of the countries being "best friends", culminating in two of the soldiers singing "Germany and Austria, sittin' in a tree!"
- The Everybody Loves Raymond episode "Someone's Cranky" features a variation as Robert bitterly calls Debra "perfect":
Robert: Perfect Debra, sitting in a tree, P-E-R-F-E-C-T.
- A more bitter version appears in The New Normal, which is about two gay men trying for a surrogate baby.
Bryan: Bryan and David sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love, then comes inability to marry, then comes a stranger with a invasive procedure, then comes the baby in the baby carriage.
- Modern Family, "Yard Sale":
Claire: I just saw Alex and Michael sitting in a tree. Don't make me spell it out for you.
- The song appears in the bridge following the second chorus of Extreme's "Play With Me", with a variation: the baby in the baby carriage gets a name, and it's Adam.
- In Calvin and Hobbes, Hobbes sings this when Calvin gets a valentine from Susie. Turns out the valentine was for Hobbes.
- FoxTrot: Jason Fox found all his classmates singing this to him after Eileen thinks he's sent her a love note.
- The episode "Broken Window" of Adventures in Odyssey has a particularly humorous take on this, as two of the children tease Connie about her frustration over her boyfriend standing her up:
Alex & Liz: Connie and Mitch, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S—
Connie: (annoyed) We were just going to talk!
Alex & Liz: Connie and Mitch, sitting in a tree, T-A-L-K-I-N—
Connie: (obviously exasperated) We're not in a tree.
Alex: Connie and Mitch, sitting in a booth—
Mr. Whittaker: And I think you'd better stop now.
Alex: We're just practicing our spelling. S-P-L-L…I mean, S-P-I-L…
- In In the Heights, in the song "Carnaval Del Barrio" in Act 2, Daniela asks Benny if he's "seen any horses, today", having heard that he and Nina "went for a roll in the hay". The whole cast then proceeds to sing said song. With harmonies. In a conga line.
- The Broadway version of Disney's The Little Mermaid has a Hold Your Hippogriffs version. Flounder sings "Ariel and someone swimming in the sea, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!"
"Grow up — and learn to harmonize!