- From Tom Hanks's special message to Springfield: "And remember, if you see me in the streets: please, leave me be!"
- "Grand Theft Walrus".
- The part with the wanted poster. You know what part we mean.
- The Springfield Police Department's bomb defusing robot stealing Wiggum's pistol & killing itself, after the pressure gets too much.
- "He always talked about it, but I never took him seriously!"
- The citizens of Springfield rioting throughout the town, and barging into the DMV. Upon which, they form an orderly line.
- Green Day's barge sinking, and the band pulling out violins & playing "Nearer My God to Thee" as they plunge to their deaths in Lake Springfield.
- Homer on a wrecking ball swinging between a rock and a bar called "A Hard Place".
- Homer's road signs.
Driver: There's something strange about that Sop Sign.
- "We can't keep stopping at every Sop, Yeld, or One Vay sign!"
- "Hey guys, I found someone! The government finally found someone we're looking for! YEAH BABY YEAH!"
- Thinking that they are all going to die, everyone from the bar runs to the church, and vice versa.
- Bart's naked skateboard ride. That would be all.
- There's something about the black box in the censored version that read "European Version Only" that made it exponentially funnier.
- Homer Flipping the Bird to the Angry Mob (on the edited TV version, his middle fingers become balled-up fists), with both hands, as he escapes down a sinkhole, then getting stuck.
- "His head is sticking out. Let's claw at it!"
- The delivery makes this line, but it's still good enough to bear quoting:
EPA Official: Sir, I'm afraid you've gone mad with power.
Russ Cargill: Of course I have! You ever tried going mad without power? It's boring! No one listens to you!
- He wants 10,000 tough guys, and he wants 10,000 soft guys to make the tough guys look tougher. And here's how he wants them arranged: Tough, tough, soft, tough, soft, soft, tough, tough, soft, soft, tough, soft.
- A hilarious slapstick moment happens a little earlier. After the official announces that they lost the Simpsons, Cargill throws his binoculars at him in anger... only for them to bounce off the dome and smack Cargill in the face.
- "Spider pig, spider pig / Does whatever a spider pig does./ Can he swing / from a web? / No he can't / He's a pig. / Look ooooooout. / He is spider pig."
- It was apparently a common occurrence in the theaters, for the entire audience to break out into song because of its popularity in advertising, making this moment even more hilarious.
- "Yes, we even advertise during movies now."
- Homer trying to scare people who are trying to break through the door by making chainsaw noises.
Stand back, I've got a chainsaw! NEM-NEM-NEM-NEMNEMNEM. NE-NE-NE *People look through holes in door* nem-nem-nem-neee.
- The skull in the lake yelling Eeeeeeeevil!!
- When Bart puts a bra on his head
- The deleted scene where Homer hitches a ride in the back of a sausage truck. He gets out and waves a friendly goodbye to the driver. The completely unsuspecting driver then decides to check on his sausages. He walks around the truck singing a little song about checking on his sausages, opens the door... cue Big "NO!".
- "Lisa's got a boy-friend, that she'll never see agai..." *PUNCH*
- Martin beating the hell out of the three bullies at the end.
"That felt good. No wonder you do it."
- This exchange regarding the angry mob:
Grandpa: I'm part of the mob!
- The part with the dog sled.
Homer: Why does everything I whip leave me?!
- When a nude Bart skateboards past Ralph...
Ralph: I like men now!
Flanders: Now children, don't forget to thank the Lord for this bountiful...Bart crashes into the window, as Flanders' french fry cleverly censors his penis.Flanders: ...''PENIS?!''Rod and Todd: Bountiful penis. Amen.
- Also when Bart crashes into the windows of Krusty Burger:
- Note the humorous irony in that since they didn't even need to censor Bart's wing-ding considering they just showed it in full no less than a minute ago.
- Homer dressing up in a uniform he apparently borrowed from a hotel doorman in order to try and trick a soldier.
Homer: Hello, I'm General... (checks his name tag) Marriott Suites. I have an urgent message from the President. It says to release this town immediately! (hands something to the soldier)Soldier: Why's it written on a leaf? (holds up a leaf with the words "release this town" written on it)Homer: Uh... (punches soldier out)
- He then checks off punching the soldier on his checklist, also written on a leaf.
- "We have a perfect life in Alaska and we're never going back to America again!"
- Homer's speech to his family in the motel room where they're hiding saying "This is America!", while all the signs in the background are in different languages.
- This Cutaway Gag.
Carl: Hey, sooner or later, people are gonna discover this.Russ Cargill Don't worry, we have a way to take you off the map.(cut to someone driving a car)GPS: And to your right... nothing.
- The ending where Homer hammers the nail into his crotch.
- Everything Grandpa does with his prophecy, and everything afterwords related to his prophecy is gut-bustingly funny.
Grandpa (referring to himself): "That crazy old man in church was right!"
- One of the unheard lines in Simpsons history:
Marge Simpson: Somebody throw the goddamn bomb!
- The Comic Book Guy's guess as to what EPA stands for: "I believe it was the sound the Green Lantern made when Sinestro threw him into a vat of acid. Eeeeeeee....pah!"
- Santa's Little Helper appears at the end of the film (having been absent the whole movie) and Bart hugs him while saying "You survived! How?" and Santa's Little Helper barks in response with subtitles added.
Santa's Little Helper: I did things no dog should do. They will haunt me forever.Bart: I love you too.
- After the townspeople fail to escape the dome thanks to Homer.
Cargill I was tricked by an idiot!Cletus: I know just how you feel. I was beat at tic-tac-toe by a chicken.
- Homer is mad that his family deserted him again and kicks the time bomb... whose time limit is cut in half because of it. Naturally, everyone's pissed off.
Krusty: GET OUTTA HERE!
- When Colin appears in the mob with a bouquet of flowers for Lisa:
Carl: Oh here, let me get that for you. (Uses his torch to turn the bouquet into another torch)