"Ridley": Uhhh... I don't quite remember that. Is that canon? Let's just go back to the 'me falling forever' canon.
And when the whole thing suddenly inverts on itself.
"Ridley": Aw shit, you learned my one ace in the hole! Damn you, Sammy!
Diabetus: I wish Ridley would call Samus "Sammy".
slowbeef: He doesn't really talk, though. That's something we did!
Diabetus: ...oh no, I can't tell the two apart anymore!
Ridley's Resort. An all-inclusive casino/hotel/resort, run by Ridley.
It's a vacation!
"I was designed at 4:00 AM! It's called crunch time! My original name was Procrastination Ridley!"
He explodes at Amorbis in Echoes, complete with a rant about how the franchise plummets when he's not around.
Amorbis: It's a livin'! Ridley: You shut the fuck up, the three of you! My catchphrase in Echoes? No way! You'll be hearin' from my lawyers, Flaahgra and Thardus Incorporated!
In Corruption, Omega Ridley's stunned and vulnerable animation (standing while waving his arms around) caused many a busted gut. Diabetus likened it to Ridley being excited on Christmas morning and frantically opening his presents.
"Ooga booga, I'm Ridley, are you scared, Samus?!"
"You got me Metroid Prime? FUCK YOU!"
Ridley outright insulting Kinect and Move (though for the former it's less about poor or gimmicky design and more about being incompatible with his size and wingspan). This is followed by pointing out every flaw in Heavy Rain, including how the Origami Killer couldn't possibly have laid out the glass shards in the tunnel during the Butterfly trial and the implausibility of a poison that works in exactly 60 minutes.
Ridley's spinning fire breath and simultaneous energy tail, or as Ridley says, "This is from my Vegas show, Samus! Tell me whatcha think!" It segues into a discussion on magicians, and into "Penn, Teller and Ridley"
"Instead of zombies, when you get bit you turn into a Ridley."
"And everyone's doing that, and the whole world gets very annoyed."
Roomin' With Ridley. One's a bounty hunter, the other's a space gargoyle!
slowbeef: Adam's the landlord. He says 'You didn't pay rent' and then locks you in a room for five hours to explain what rent is and how to pay it.
And from that fight to the end of the LP, the Ridley voice, jokes and craziness continue.
Even though Ridley is nowhere to be found in Metroid Prime 2 multiplayer, he still manages to make himself heard:
"Now take all the bounty, Samus! Listen, did you find that coin chest yet, 'cause seriously, it's really bothering me!"
Other guests have tried their hand at the Ridley voice, with amusing results. They include Vicas, ScurvyKip, Blister, RChimpCola and Cherrydoom. That last one is particularly entertaining, considering Cherrydoom later edited out her attempt and therefore never saw the light of day. slowbeef and Diabetus call her out on it.
slowbeef: Fuck you, Cherrydoom.
Meta-example: slowbeef proudly proclaiming his intent to scan the hell out of everything at the beginning... and missing the only pirate lore on the frigate.
All of slowbeef's early scanning counts, especially his complaints about the enemy names being unoriginal.
Diabetus: Can you scan it?
slowbeef: Hey, wait. Oh God, I can?
Diabetus: I knew it.
slowbeef: 'Tangle Weed'. Shut up. Tangle weed, what the fuck is that?
Diabetus: Whatever biologist explored Tallon IV is the least creative person I've ever seen.
slowbeef: Oh, wow, this is absolutely breathtaking—flyingpirates HERE?! UNDERWATER?!
The aptly named "Trainwreck with Khad/Toffile." Especially when slowbeef blows his stack against Khad about halfway through the video.
In later videos during the same recording session, slowbeef encounters Chozo Ghosts and Khad turns on the Ghostbusters theme, which screws with the audio recording. Slowbeef laughs the first time, though the humor wears off afterward.
slowbeef:*echoing* Khad, it's going to loop our voices back into the microphone!
At one point, Samus' eye reflections render incorrectly, resulting in a brief glimpse of completely black eyes. Slowbeef ends up getting freaked out by it.
slowbeef: The problem with Khad is the minute he starts IMing you, it's like cancer or something where it doesn't really stop. But you just can't get rid of him then. And if you ignore him, it somehow just spurs him on even worse. Wait... "The Age of Anxiety".
Any time slowbeef attempts to pronounce Luminoth names.
Slowbeef's reaction to the Kinetic Orb Cannon:
slowbeef: What...WHAT?! Wait a-wait a minute, WHAT?!...WHAT? What, but why-but why w-...That's the-that's the stupidest fucking thing I've ever heard!
Vicas: You never know when you're gonna need to shoot Kinetic Orbs around.
When it works, slowbeef rants incredulously about how Samus couldn't have possibly expected that to work.
The whole argument about Diabetus telling slowbeef that he's going the wrong way in episode 14.
Half of the entire LP consists of Take Thats against Other M. The funny parts are when they mock Sakamoto, though, which reaches its climax when slowbeef purposely mistranslates his developer's message in the beginning of Episode 13:
Translation: Hello, this is Yoshio Sakamoto! It's not easy writing stories for Metroid... considering my functional illiteracy. Honestly, I don't really like Samus, and I don't want you to like her, either. I hate her and feel threatened by her. I will ruin this franchise. I'm just coming out and telling you. Fuck Metroid and fuck you.
There's also their impressions of Sakamoto whining about Metroid's story, in a baby voice.
slowbeef: "Samus is a girl, therefore she cwies!" Diabetus: "Samus wants authowization!" slowbeef: "Men want to do her job!" Diabetus: "Tha's what women do!" slowbeef: "You can't go in the last area, you're a woman!"
"Samus is scared of Widley!" "Widley." "Widley."
They quickly grow tired of the tendency for every boss in the game to have a Shockwave Stomp. It culminates with Omega Ridley asking if his use of the move is original.
As a phazite door slams down infront of Samus when she's infiltrating the Pirate homeworld, Diabetus takes the time to lampshade the poorly hidden excuse for backtracking.
*SLAM* "FUCK YOU"
The beginning of video five.
slowbeef: (After making Chip Cheezum's Mii) This would've been a lot funnier before I spent like, an hour with Diabetus having technical issues... Diabetus: Oh, me? It was just me? (Beat) slowbeef: ...Whatever. Go to hell. [...] slowbeef: (Heard untangling wires in the background) Now my fucking Wiimote's caught up in my Guitar Hero drums... Or, whatever. Fuck it. (Chip laughs) slowbeef: Damn it! ...Stupid... bullshit!! ChipCheezum: Let's play the drums!
In the next video, Diabetus fights through That One Level with slowbeef alternating between mocking him and insisting they're gonna edit stuff out, right down to Diabetus doing introductions every time he dies and restarts. Bonus points for a few well-placed Description Cuts to his off-screen rematch with Yakuza.
Everything about the logistics of the Sector 3 meltdown crisis. They eventually conclude that it was a Taking You with Me suicide attempt by the Lava Clam.
Super Metroid Justin Bailey Hack
The entire first video; slowbeef initially starts out unimpressed, but as he plays more, he goes into a state of shock over how horrifying it is that someone made this.
Dead To Rights/Dead To Rights: Retribution
The Dead to Rights LP and its subsequent remake are both good, but a few moments do stand out, such as the prison with its cigarette-bartering system and Fahook's plane.
In the LP of the remake, they crack up during the 'bonding' father-son boxing match and then explore Jack's motivations. "Look Dad, I broke this guy's neck _and_ electrocuted him to death! *disturbed gleeful cackle* See, I don't need therapy!"
Answer: This device can turn the barren wasteland into lush, verdant landscape.
Diabetus: What is Bob Ross?
From the end of the Fallout 2 clues:
dave_o: Who wrote this question? Sartak: Dancing With Ferrets. dave_o: What is his answer? Sartak: "The Enclave". dave_o: What a queer. You hear that, Dancing With Ferrets? (slowbeef explodes into laughter) dave_o: You're so queer you're killing slowbeef with laughter. slowbeef: I'm a little dizzy from that.
There's the Running Gag of wanting to find and pick up eggs so that the other player can request them.
RE5 - Wesker/Chris Facility
Diabetus: Well you know, Chris and Wesker aren't really on the best of terms.
slowbeef: That's the thing, you know, they don't really like each other. I think it had to do with, like Twitter.
Diabetus: Yeah, I think it was some kind of YouTube drama.
Wesker/Chris in the Facility - Take Two
During a tense moment...
slowbeef: Fuck me!
Diabetus: After we're done!
slowbeef: (chuckles) Don't tell the Internet!
RE5 - Jill/Sheva in the Ancient Ruins
slowbeef: This guy tried to impale me and he completely missed. I'm talking about his spear. I'm talking about his wooden spear. I'm talking about his wooden spear without any sort of innuendo whatsoever.
Diabetus: Look, dicks, okay?
slowbeef: Read my fanfiction, that's what I'm getting at!
Diabetus: Please! It's all I have.
slowbeef: "Jill and Shee—Sheva were caught in the ruins." I got yelled at for calling her "Sheeva" the other day.
Diabetus: What, like at work?
slowbeef: (chuckles) Yes, at work. My boss was really upset with me.
slowbeef: I have, like eight guys on my ass.
Diabetus: There's like a fan club following you!
slowbeef: Yeah, I noticed! Ohh good God!
Diabetus: (in "old-timey newsroom" voice) "Jill! Jill, we love your work! Jill!"
slowbeef: (also assuming the voice) "Jill! Jill Valentine!"
Diabetus: "Jill, can we please have a woid?"
slowbeef: "Resident Evil 3 was the greatest, rahhh! We're a tribe in Africa but this is how we talk, rahhh!"
Diabetus: 1920s Africa.
RE5 - And Now Something for the Ladies
Diabetus: Yeah, I'm doing just great over here.
slowbeef: Um... keep in mind that visual jokes don't really work on my end.
Diabetus: No, trust me, I'm doing great!
Slowbeef's screen shows Wesker (Diabetus) getting floored by an Executioner's hammer.
slowbeef: Ooh, ahh... all right.
Revenge of Shinobi for the "Hard Games Thread"
His claiming to have a letter from Sega's lawyers when he comes across something in the game that is particularly lawyer-baiting and how said letters claim said thing is not what it appears to be ripping off (Except for Spider-Man and Godzilla)
His joking about how Joe Musashi might be an Italian ninja who got his weapons from Rocco Takahashi and Hattori Hanzo (AKA The Gooch)