Funny / Princess: The Hopeful

• Almost everything about the Princesses of Spades is comedy gold:
  • For starters, there is the fact the Queen of Spades herself is responsible for half the graffiti in her own Kingdom.
  • Then you have a part where a Knave complains about how her Court have the reputation of being lazy. And to prove her point, she makes the list of all the incredibly long and complicated preparations she had to do in order to make parties that everyone would have fun with.
  "Being a Knave is hard work, last week I had five parties, five! That was a lot of planning, and dancing really tires you out!"
  • And then, there are the stereotype entries describing how they feel about other factions and creatures:
  Mirrors: Those special powers, did you know they stop working if... oops! Too late!
  Werewolves: Discretion is often the best part of valour when a pissed-off eight foot monster is on the prowl.
  Mages: Look at the puppet-masters, making society dance on strings to their tunes. Never let them catch you with scissors.
  Prometheans: Well, it's like... where to begin... I usually don't have to explain what a joke is.
  Sin-Eaters: Partying in the face of death; you've got style! Hey, I've never tried rum before. Want to share a bottle?
  Mad Scientists: Oh, don't mind us. We're just watching, but um, can we like, be the beautiful lab assistants and shout "It's Alive!" or something?
  Leviathans: Um, right, yeah, living in the sky is starting to look like a good idea.
  Hunters: Why are you so serious, ok I know why you're so serious, but you'd cope better if you laughed once in a while anyway.
  • One of the listed inspirations is Pinkie Pie, which honestly explains so much.
• Some of the Mirrors' stereotypes are funny as well, if just for how bratty they can be about everything:
  Diamonds: Maths class is Boooring!
  Cups: A journey to find yourself? I looked in the mirror and I like what I see. Now what?
  Wands: You're right. There's no "I" in "Team". But there is a "Me" and that's close enough.
  Vampires: Creatures of the Night, begone in the name of the Light! Unless you're one of the hot ones I can save, of course!
  Mages: Years of study, and you can't even do magic in front of people? You got the boring powers.
  Sin-Eaters: Sweet party. Real nice... um, death theme. And the... ghosts. And... um. I have to go.
  Mummies: Stop worshipping it! It's old and ugly. I am the one you should be worshipping!
  • Even better, they actually get their own entry for the stereotype they have toward themselves. Said stereotype?
  Mirrors: You're not the True Heir! I am!
  • Let's not forget Mirrors and Pentacles stereotypes on each other. Pentacles being Mirror's Precursor of all things!
  Mirrors on Pentacles: Don't tell me what to do! I am the True Heir! The True Queen told me so!
  Pentacles on Mirrors: A parent has the right to making decisions for the child should the child’s decisions prove to be…obviously flawed.
  • And now since the Beasts have now been given entries for stereotypes, most of them for the other courts have been reason why you suck speeches, but for Mirrors? It sounds like something a Hero, whose normal actions could very well be like a Princess of Mirrors would say.
  Mirrors on Beasts: I'll vanquish you and show the world how awesome I am!
  • Stereotypes of other Courts toward Mirrors are hilarious as well, if just for how it highlight the fact they find them irritating:
  Diamonds on Mirrors: Someone needs to deflate their ego before they get someone killed.
  Hearts on Mirrors: For the Light's sake, grow up and be responsible for once!
  Swords on Mirrors: You're not supposed to be in love with yourself.
• Graces are amusingly snarky in some of their stereotypes:
  Vampires: Explain to me again how your civilisation is anything of the sort.
  Sin-Eaters: This mythology was stolen from Dragonlance, and it sounds like you wrote this code of honor while you were drunk! Is there anything of substance in your society?
  Mad Scientists: So if I get the institute to apologize for laughing at your research will you destroy the killbots? No? Do you even know what you want?!
  • Menders give us these pearls:
  Vampires: Incurable.
  Sin-Eaters: I know you had one miraculous recovery, but as your doctor I must recommend you cut back on the drink, and the drugs, and the unprotected sex.
  Mad Scientists: Do you want to talk about it? Of course I am not calling you mad!
  • And then there's Troubadours' stereotype toward Hunters and Beasts:
  Hunters: You fight monsters? Without any special powers to help you out? And you win? [bites lip] Do you want my number?
  Beasts: I used to tell my little sister monster stories when she was naughty. I still have the books, they never knifed anyone and stole their wallet.
  • Princesses of Diamonds have this to say regarding Princesses of Swords:
  Diamonds on Swords: When you need a grand, dramatic gesture, call for them. When you need subtlety, call for someone- anybody - else.
  • On the fan-made Queens side, we got the Stereotypes Courts have toward Princesses of Brass:
  Clubs: Our goals are similar, but perhaps you are taking it a bit too quickly.
  Hearts: Put some clothes on.
  Spades: Woah, I missed a great party.
  Swords: Aren't we skipping a few steps here?
  Tears: For Empress' sake, please put some clothes on.
  Mirrors: You think you're prettier than me?! Is that it?!?!
  • And the stereotypes the fanmade Queen of Melodies has:
  Storms: Darkness this, darkness that. Seriously, you’d think that you were some kind of jealous ex-lover that the Darkness left because your boobs were too small. Grow up.
  Sin-Eaters: Humm...you know, never being alone in that way sounds awfully lonely. Whatever, pass me that drink homeboy.
  Mummies: I reincarnate, dude. Let’s be friends forever.
  Leviathans: W-wha? Uh, I uh...sure, we can be...friends. I guess. I always wondered what it’d be like to be friends with Godzilla…
  • Some of what the Princesses of Wands have to say are also hilarious:
  Mages: Alright, I get it that you have magical powers, but so does almost everyone else in this world.
  Clubs: So...what exactly are you supposed to do?
• One of the Umbrae, Infectious Hate, allows its user to turn any regular mortal into a Darkened just by delivering them a Breaking Speech. This in itself isn't particularly funny, but the description mentions that every Princess who knows of this Umbrae agrees that it has one positive side. Said positive side? "It's rare."
• Another Umbra, Hunger Means Nothing, allow Creatures of the Darkness to survive without having to feed or drink. It however has the side effect of making them lose weight, become physically weaker, and, as described by the book, "look too thin, like a cancer patient, or (some cynical Princesses might remark) a top fashion model."
• Instead of having a Practical Magic, Princesses of Mirrors get the ability to have their Transformed form as their default mode, while their mundane form is the one they need to make a transformation roll for. The justification for this? They are so self-absorbed that it is harder for them to be "normal". A Princess of Mirrors is literally capable of maintaining her transformed state through the sheer force of her ego.
• The Royal Tongue is frequently mocked for being overcomplicated Purple Prose, making it impractical and hard to use even for a simple sentence. People actually went to ask some of the Queens how such a language came to be. The Queen of Hearts implied it was deliberate, the Queen of Spades burst into laughter, and the Queen of Diamonds (who is fluent in, and prefer, most Earthly languages) gave a put upon sigh.
  • The original book lays out how overblown the Royal Tongue is: The closest thing it has to "Thank you for helping" would, if translated into English, come out as two paragraphs about the virtues of teamwork.
• The Through the Looking Glass Charm allows a Princess to enter the world behind any mirror. One of the advantages this provide is that she can carve out an invisible hole to hide things inside. According to the description, this is "perfect for storing weapons, valuable Bequests or bringing boyfriends you don't want your mother to know about."
• The game's wiki provides a page dedicated to crossovers, explaining in details how Princesses interact with other supernaturals. Demons get both a short and long answers. The short answer? "They don't get along".
  • Then we get the long answer, which basically explains Princesses are creeped out by Demons occasionally becoming stalkish toward them...
• Further going along with the Crossovers example is with the Beasts. The opening line?
  Princess Crossovers on Beasts: "Of all the creatures of night, Beasts hold the dubious distinction of being the one kind Princesses might like even less than Demons."
• The Dream version has a gem when talking about Sworn and their Practical Magic.
  "Sworn also have access to their Queen's practical magic (and yes, the Court of Mirrors offers no useful practical magic to it's Sworn)."
  • Made even funnier in a latter update, where Sworns were given unique Practical Magics to be more useful. Most of them gain ability improving their own abilities, which is actually useful to them. Sworns of Mirrors... get the ability to boost the Princesses they swore to.
• An update introduced the "Rising Darkness" mechanic, an optional rule allowing to measure through "Tension" how influent and powerful the Darkness is in the city where your campaign take place. Tension level 2 has this description:
  "Taint is beginning to spread and the occasional roaming Darkspawns or indulging Darkened strike during the dead of night. Another typical city for the World of Darkness."
• Some conversation on the Discord came up with a funny idea involving a Princess of Mirrors and the Skinchange Charm. It had been confirmed earlier that the Skinchange charm could involve shapeshifting into extinct animals, and combined with Mirror's Practical Magic to stay transformed as an animal indefinitely. Imagine, if you will, a normal Noble of Mirrors turning into a 40ft long, 20 feet tall Tyrannosaurus Rex and being able to stay that way indefinitely.
• The Living Image Charm in both versions allows for making a piece of artwork (be it any kind of drawing, dancing, composing, magical confections, fireworks, etc) to hold a charm and release it upon someone who looks at it. There are some upgrades that allow affecting certain people, but in the Dream Version there's an Upgrade involving Tempesta that allows targeting Creatures of Darkness. Naturally, this means the artwork would usually be used to kill them. The text for it speaks best.
  "And yes, with the right Charm it is indeed possible to create artwork that makes Darkspawn feel so bad they explode. After all, emotions are magic."
• This comment on the Discord Server.
  Troubadour of Storms: "I call this piece, 'Kick Darkness in the Dick', which represents me kicking the Darkness in the dick."
  Group of other Furies: *Thundering applause*
• The I Like Boys Charm is essentially internalized homophobia in magic form, ensuring that the Noble of Mirrors fall for the right boy in case they have a crush on a girl. The description notes that every other Court finds this utterly stupid.
• Shortly before the events of Ashes of Motor City, a dark cult that has controlled Detroit for decades was brought down. Not by a team of magical girls or even the Radiant Campaign, but by a normal, non-magical bureaucrat who double-checked the numbers, noticed something was wrong, and reported them to the IRS for embezzlement.