Film: Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
Hooray for Santy Claus!Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
(also titled Santa Claus Defeats the Aliens
) is a 1964 science fiction film (originally a children's book) in which Martians, trying to cure the malaise of their children, kidnap THE Santa Claus (and a couple of earth kids that got mixed up in the plot) and take him to Mars to create the first Martian Christmas. Santa takes the whole thing surprisingly
well and is only too happy to help. However, a small band of Martians rebel against the idea of Christmas or children being happy and try to kill Santa Claus. By the end of the movie, the Martians discover that they can just get a really annoying Martian named Dropo to stuff a pillow down his shirt and DRESS as Santa, thus allowing Santa and the earth kids to go home.
A No Budget
kids film with cheap sets, awful costumes, cheesy acting, and a laughably bad script, the film regularly appears on lists of the worst films ever made. It is regularly featured in the "bottom 100" list on the Internet Movie Database, and was also featured in an episode of the Elvira hosted Movie Macabre
, the 1986 syndicated series Canned Film Festival
and numerous other venues for bad movies over the years. It was directed by Nicholas Webster, and it stars John Call as Santa Claus. It also includes an 8-year-old Pia Zadora
playing the role of one of the Martian children.
It also had a comic book adaptation that was mocked on Atop The Fourth Wall
For the Mystery Science Theater 3000
version, please go to the episode recap page
. Both Cinematic Titanic
riffed the film as well.
This film got the RiffTrax
Live treatment on December 5, 2013.
- Air-Vent Passageway: Santa escapes being Thrown Out the Airlock this way. Given that this is Santa Claus, shimmying through vents should be a given.
- Aliens Steal Cable: The alien children learn about Santa Claus through the reception of Earth
TV shows programs.
- Annoying Younger Sibling: Betty Foster
- Arch-Enemy: Voldar
- Badass Santa: Santa doesn't ever fight anyone, but it should be noted how easily he shrugs and laughs at the numerous attempts on his life.
- Captain Ersatz: Wernher von "Green".
- Christmas Elves: Unfortunately, they don't stand a chance against the Martians' Whamo Air Blasters.
- Comic book adaptation: Dell published it as part of their "Movie Classics" line in the 1960s!
- Covers Always Lie: The film is called Santa Claus Conquers The Martians, although there's not really a lot of "conquering" going on, thought it's probably meant in terms of hearts and minds.
- Enclosed Space: The air lock where Santa Claus and the earth kids where trapped.
- Evil Is Hammy: Voldar really chews the scenery.
- Fail O Sucky Name: Dropo.
- Food Pills: The Martian cuisine of choice
- The Fool: Dropo
- Foreshadowing: Dropo is warned that he might be left on Earth in place of Santa Claus. The film concludes with Dropo being Mars' Santa.
- The Grinch: Voldar
- Henpecked Husband: Implied. When Mrs. Claus is frozen by Martian Wham-O Airblasters, Santa remarks that he can't remember the last time she was that quiet that long.
- Hermit Guru: Chochem, the Troll doll.
- Jerkass: Voldar
- Killer Robot: Torg (an anagram of "Gort", the killer robot from The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951)).
- Ludd Was Right: Hinted at after the toy-making machine is sabotaged.
- Mars: Evidently.
- Mechanistic Alien Culture: The Martians: Food Pill-eating, joyless, humorless humanoid creatures with metallic-green skin and distinctly robot-like headgear incorporated into their costume design; the dullness of their heavily mechanized lives results in their children getting addicted to joyful, cheery Earthling holiday television programming.
- Mrs. Claus: This is the first time she appears as a character in an audio-visual medium.
- Mundane Fantastic: In a refreshing departure from many a Christmas Special, Santa Claus is acknowledged as real and the army is dispatched when he gets kidnapped.
- Neutral Female: Momar
- Nice Hat: The hats that every Martian wears. The only one that doesn't wear one is Chochem.
- No Celebrities Were Harmed: Wernher von Green
- Obviously Evil: Voldar, ridiculously so.
- Off-the-Shelf FX: The Whammo air guns.
- Paper-Thin Disguise: After Droppo dresses as Santa, he's mistaken by the bad guys for the real Santa, despite the fact that his helmet can clearly be seen as well as his green face.
- The Pollyanna: Santa.
- Planetville: Mars apparently consists of a house, a factory, and a cave.
- Plucky Comic Relief: Dropo.
- Portmanteau: Kimar (king Martian), Momar (mom Martian), Bomar (boy Martian), Girmar (girl Martian) etc. Not sure if Dropo means anything.
- Proud Warrior Race Guy: According to Voldar the Martians used to be like this. He's hoping killing the humans will be a move back to what he considers Good Old Ways.
- Punctuated! For! Emphasis!: "Torg! COME. Out. Of. The. Spaceship."
- Reasonable Authority Figure: Kimar
- Repeat to Confirm: The Martian crew, while flying to and from Earth: "Fire retrorockets five and six." "Retrorockets five and six. Fire."
- Screen-to-Stage Adaptation: A small theater in CA has adapted this to stage and performs it every holiday season. It is snarkerific. The tickets for every seat of the season typically sell out within a few weeks of going on sale and the competition grows every year since people who've gone once want to see it again the next year. Much of the humor comes from the improvisation that the actors produce, so it's worth seeing every year even if you've already seen it.
- Shout-Out The robot "Torg" was likely a reference to "Gort" from The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951) except with much, much less budget or creativity.
- Voldar mentions being able to destroy a city with a blast of the Martian Q-Ray.
- Single-Biome Planet: Justified, as it is, well, Mars.
- The Slacker: Dropo
- Spelling Song: "You spell it S-A-N-T-A C-L-A-U-S, hooray for Santy Claus!"
- Stock Footage: Used to show how "much" the armed forces are defending the Earth.
- Some of which appears to be from World War II.
- Stupid Statement Dance Mix: This film inspired a lo-fi techno group called "The Laziest Men on Mars"; they named themselves & their title track after what the "Chief" called Dropo. If you've never heard of them, they did the song that powered All Your Base.
- That Makes Me Feel Angry: "I'm cold! I'm tired!"
- Tin-Can Robot: Torg. More accurately Cardboard Painted Silver Robot.
- Toys: Check – Santa makes ‘em on Mars.
- True Meaning of Christmas: The movie's theme is teaching the Martians the meaning of Christmas: To have fun.