Characters / The Joe Schmo Show

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    Season 1 - Lap of Luxury 

Matt Kennedy Gould

Matt Kennedy Gould is our unsuspecting “contestant” and the ultimate wildcard element that this entire show revolves around. Think middle. Middle class. Middle America and middle of the road. A native of Pittsburgh, PA, Matt recently dropped out of law school and is a pizza deliveryman until he figures out what he wants to do with his life. He is the only non-actor of the house. Matt Kennedy Gould is our “Joe Schmo.”

Ashleigh, the Rich Bitch

For Ashleigh it’s always that time of the month - for the entire month. A little too beautiful and a little too smart, Ashleigh is just a little too eager to grind your heart with the heel of her expensive, high-heeled shoes. Having a good day? Don’t worry, Ashleigh will fix that in no time flat.

Played by: Melissa Yvonne Lewis

Brian, the Buddy

He’s the guy that befriends Matt by becoming his buddy and sounding board. He’s always quick with a joke and a naturally funny guy.

Played by: Brian Keith Etheridge, also one of the show's writers

Dr. Pat, the Quack

Though divorced three times with no children, Dr. Pat is a family and marriage counselor. Her theory on listening: “That’s why God gave us two ears and one mouth.” Unfortunately, Dr. Pat’s actions make her seem as though she has no ears and five mouths. If you think that the house is crowded with now, wait until Dr. Pat whips out her anatomically correct ‘therapy dolls.’

Played by: Kristen Wiig

Earl, the Veteran

Earl is a former Special-Ops veteran with more than 60 combat missions under his belt. Earl has seen it all, including a few things he’d probably rather forget. He’s the strong, silent and sinewy type, and as one might expect, a very intimidating presence. Like many of his generation, Earl doesn’t adjust well to modern technology changes and possesses a strong disdain for any “alternative” lifestyles.

Played by: Franklin Dennis Jones

Gina, the Schemer

Gina is the sexy spitfire who wants to win the game at all costs. She has a tattoo reading “Girls Kick Ass” on the top of her foot – which explains it all. Gina thinks she’s a “reality show expert,” but her frantic alliance-building tactic may backfire.

Played by: Nikki Davis

Hutch, the Asshole

“The Hutch” passes himself off as a cop, but he actually wasn’t able to pass the Houston PD psych test. So all he passes now the store-fronts on his beat as a security guard at the local mall. An authority-dispensing bully who has the ability to burrow under everyone’s skin. Though physically gifted, he’s definitely mentally challenged. The Hutch’s horrific hygiene and uncouth social habits make him the guy everyone loves to hate.

Played by: David Hornsby

Kip, the Gay Guy

Kip is the loveable doormat with a huge heart. Kip wears his emotions on his sleeve…his collar…and his boa scarf. He’ll laugh. He’ll cry. He’ll keep right on crying. Kip is somewhere over the raninbow….flag that is. He’s the one guy who always wants a group hug.

Played by: Lance Krall

Molly, the Virgin

She’s pure as the driven snow and straight out of Sunday school. Molly is “miss goody two-shoes,” complete with teddy bear T-shirts, Creed posters and old-fashioned sayings like “Oh, my stars!”

Played by: Angela Dodson

Ralph Garman, the Smarmy Host

A complete on-camera professional who isn't quite as smooth off-air. He's a bit of a prima donna - prickly and difficult. Our host lost out to his nemesis Ryan Seacrest for the "American Idol" job and can't quite get over the fact that he's slumming by doing this cable gig.

Played by: Ralph Garman

    Season 2 - Last Chance For Love 

Tim Walsh

Tim Walsh is this season's "Joe Schmo." A resident of Washington, DC, Tim is true to his Irish roots - a bartender with entrepreneurial aspirations to open his own bar. He's athletic, witty, outgoing and an overall genuine guy.

Ingrid Wiese

Ingrid Wiese is our first ever "Jane Schmo." Also a resident of our nation's capitol, Ingrid is the classic girl-next-door meets woman- of-the-world. She's intelligent - with a dream of becoming the next Madeline Albright someday - strong-willed, and thankfully, up for anything.

Amanda Naughton

Amanda was as she says "proudly born and raised in Pittsburgh - it is andalways will be my hometown! GO STEELERS!!!" She lived in Pittsburgh until she moved to DC at age 22, right after college (she went to the University of Michigan, BA in English).

Austin, the Bachelor

Austin is “Last Chance for Love’s” answer to “The Bachelor.” Austin is the ideal guy - every woman’s fantasy. He’s got stunning teeth, broad shoulders and high cheekbones. What’s not to like?

Played by: Tim Herzog

Piper, the Bachelorette

Piper is every guy’s dream. She’s a blonde with a hot body and a personality to match. Piper is the perfect type of woman to inspire competition amongst “Last Chance For Love’s” suitors.

Played by: Valerie Azlynn

Ambrosia, the Bitch

In her own words, Ambrosia is “not here to make friends.” She’s a win at all costs pageant princess, complete with a long list of victims she’s spiked along the way with the heel of her Manalo Blahniks. In Junior High she teased half the girls in her class into eating disorders. Ambrosia’s biological clock has begun to tick loudly, driving her to new heights of competitiveness and cruelty.

Played by: Gretchen Palmer

Bryce, the Stalker

Bryce is in serious need of love. He’s a deeply romantic guy, an expresser of affection and a writer of poetry. However, Bryce takes things way too far. His display of slavish devotion to Piper constantly gets creepier and creepier. He is super possessive and has a strong streak of jealousy.

Played by: Kevin Kirkpatrick

Cammy, the Moron

Sexiness is the only thing going for Cammy. She’s hilariously, absurdly, shockingly dumb. Dumber than a rock. Dumber than a shoe! Think Jessica Simpson without the musical career. Lots of glazed over stares. Lots of confusion over whether buffalos have wings. Cammy couldn’t think her way into a corner, let alone out of one…

Played by: Jana Speaker

Eleanor, the Weeper

Eleanor is an adorable, sweet, co-dependent, weepy doormat with hair-trigger tear ducts. She cries over everything! Eleanor is desperately in love with Austin after only eight seconds in the room with him. She is ready to have his babies tomorrow. Eleanor is one tissue box away from a nervous breakdown.

Played by: Jessica Makinson

Ernie, the Heir

Ernie is the perfect guy in almost every way. He’s a gentleman - cultured, debonair and stinking rich, an heir to the Gallo winery fortune. Though Ernie seems perfect on paper, there’s one small problem that most women can’t overlook…he’s a bit chubby.

Played by: Steve Mallory

Gerald, the Gotta-Be-Gay Guy

Gerald is the guy that seems to be in denial over his sexual orientation. He’s good with the ladies, but is it for a completely different reason than what he likes to think. Is Gerald ignoring the signs of his of his sexual orientation? He’s nicely groomed and in touch with his feelings. Could he be repressing what his heart truly desires? Or is he just “in touch” with his feminine side?

Played by: Jonathan Torrens

Rita, the Drunk

Rita is a sweetheart, except for her unquenchable desire to get trashed beyond all human comprehension. She’s sweet and often repentant when sober, but has fallen off no fewer than forty-six wagons…. Forty-seven if you include the New Orleans rubbing alcohol incident. Rita is Austin’s immediate favorite, but she quickly harms her chances by getting rip-roaring drunk.

Played by: Natasha Leggero

T.J., the Playah

T.J. possesses the three “C’s”: Cheese, Camaro and Chest Medallion. He fancies himself as the ultimate ladies man, but he couldn’t be more ridiculous, boorish, and offensive. T.J. is every woman’s worst nightmare.

Played by: Jon Huertas

Derek Newcastle, the Pompous Host

Derek was the host of the original British version of “Last Chance for Love.” He’s now “crossed the pond” to host this American version and hopefully earn the respect his countrymen obviously wouldn’t give him. A pompous, self-absorbed Brit, he’s given to name-dropping about any British superstar with whom he’s rubbed elbows, particularly if their name starts with ‘Sir’ or ‘Dame.’

Played by: Ralph Garman

    Season 3 - The Full Bounty 

Chase Rogan

Chase Rogan is an all around good guy. This 28-year-old Pennsylvania native and sports fanatic lives in Pittsburgh with his wife.

Allen, the Buddy

Allen is like a walking, talking Labrador Retriever. He is always supportive, always happy to see you and is always positive.

Played by: Rob Belushi

Allison, the Overachieving Asian

Allison is the classic over-achiever. She excels at everything and was a straight A student since pre-pre-school, even graduating medical school at the age of 22. She'd be a great doctor if only she didn't have explosive anger issues that prevent her from practicing.

Played by: Nikki Mc Kenzie

Chico, the Ex-Con

Chico is an ex gang-banger who found religion in prison. Formerly addicted to everything, Chico is trying to start a new life. He thinks of bounty hunting as a form of mission work.

Played by: Lombardo Boyar

Chloe, the Model

Chloe really hopes appearing on a reality show will boost her modeling career. She's in her mid-twenties and knows that those Eastern European endorsement deals won't last forever.

Played by: Chelsey Crisp

Karlee, the Deaf Girl

Karlee is out to prove that she's very "handi-capable." She is a fierce competitor.

Played by: Jo Newman

Stan, the Interpreter

As Karlee's ASL interpreter, Stan is her bridge to communicating with the rest of the world. He also is in a romantic relationship with Karlee. It's so secret that no one, not even Karlee is aware of it.

Played by: Fred Cross

Lavernius, the Black Guy

Lavernius is big, loud, fierce, and black. Physically, Lavernius is a competitor that cannot be ignored. However, he's got a secret that will definitely shake up the game.

Played by: Segun Oduolowu

Lorenzo Lamas, the Celebrity

The classic cautionary tale for Hollywood stars. A victim of aging, four ex-wives, and six kids, Lamas looks at this reality show as a chance for him to find a new career. He needs the money. Just ask his ex-wives.

Played by: Lorenzo Lamas

Randy, the Asshole

Randy is offensive, rude, and completely self-absorbed. He's your typical reality show asshole and he's clearly not here to make friends. Randy will lie, cheat, or sleep his way to victory.

Played by: Michael Weaver

Skylar, the Widow

Skylar is looking for a new career since her husband died in a freak cement-pouring accident and left her with an infant daughter to raise. She's led a very sheltered life and she's often oblivious to the world around her.

Played by: Meghan Falcone

Jake Montrose, the Bounty Hunter

Jake can't go through metal detectors because he's tough as nails with balls of steel. Owner and operator of Montrose Bail Bonds and Fugitive Recovery Services, Jake has built an empire that has franchises in 37 states and Canada. As his commercials state, "He has a 110% success rate. He finds felons people didn't even know were missing."

Played by: Ralph Garman

Wanda, the Trophy Wife

Wanda may be as dumb as a rock, but she is hot as hell. She worships her husband, Jake. He's her confidante, lover and grandfather figure. Sure, her youthful exuberance sometimes gets on Jakes nerves, but he puts up with it because she looks fantastic in a bathing suit.

Played by: Amanda Landry