ITT: We are all Pokémon Trainers

Geographic Society Office

Tommy is strutting down the halls pointing finger guns at everyone like some sort of loser dancing to a [James Brown] song. It was a good thing he wasn't some sort of emo bad boy wannabe, since it appears to be endearingly dorky rather than eye-searingly cringey. Or so he thinks.

Tommy: Hey everyone.

He walks up to Shutter, preparing for a field shoot.

Tommy: 'Sup Shutter.

Shutter: Hey, Tommy. First off all, I speak on behalf of not only the entire production floor but also the entire Geographic Society. Never. Do that. Again.

Tommy: Pffft, killjoy. So, your panel's in a few days. Excited?

Shutter: I was offered a pay hike and I was gonna go there anyway. My episode needed to feature the actions of trainers responding to crisis, and what better way to present this in my own unique way than to look at every one of my childhood and adult traumas and be reminded that, in each and every one of those moments, someone had always stepped in to help us.

Tommy: Wow.

Shutter: It's actually the entire angle of the episode; heroism steps in. You'll never know when a trainer and their pokémon would be called to do something extraordinary. Speaking of which, you were saying something about how you're not at the bottom of the pyramid anymore?

Tommy: As a matter of fact...

This is Ivan's cue to pop up.

Edited by MasterJayAM on Oct 7th 2018 at 6:20:25 PM

-Ivan shows up. He's looking absolutely normal. Except he's holding a large container of... something.-

Ivan: "Oh, hey, I know you guys. Weren't you at that dinner with Jean?"

-Ivan shrugs. He holds out the container.-

Ivan: "I went and made some homemade [apple]sauce, to make a good first impression! Here you go."

-Ivan opens the container and something which can loosely be described as sauce is inside. It looks to be more solid than liquid.-

Ivan: "I took a few liberties with the recipe, but it's been in my family for ages, so I figured, why not spice things up?"

-The concoction begins faintly hissing as Ivan sets it down.-

Ivan: "Anyways, I'm really excited to be working with you! I know it'll be enjoyable for all of us."

Edited by redneckphoenix on Oct 7th 2018 at 3:56:01 PM

Geographic Society Office, Lumiose

Tommy, reaching out to his : How you doin'. Tommy Petersen. Your new boss.

Shutter: Don't get cocky, kid.

Tommy: Aw shucks, Gavin. But yes, Ivan. You'll be assigned as my understudy for the next couple of weeks or until you get reassigned to someone else. Now, since I've only been here for a month on field duty so I don't have a real cubicle. So we'll use the lunch room as a meeting place. Oh, and here's a little someone who wants to say hello.

Tommy releases a Pokéball which releases an oddly colored spinarak.

Tommy: Meet Tobi. This little guy's been my partner for quite some time now. I've other Pokémon but since the Lumiose Crisis they've been wandering around the PEFE Headquarters and hanging out with the J-Team.

PEFE HQ

Drake: <We saw the Ghost Lord! Hoo boy Tommy's gonna be so jealous!>

Shinji: <I do so think we'd make a terrific addition to the J-Team. And then we can use PEFE's vast arsenal of resources to nuke that [Orthocone] off the face of the Earth. Now let's go look for that lunch room. My superior sense of smell detects pizza in the premises. Brick oven cooked, possibly made by hand. Definitely not [DiGiornos'].>

Drake: <Totally. Maybe if we're lucky we can give that crappy Sir Aaron Cosplayer and that scary scientist lady the slip.>

Edited by MasterJayAM on Oct 7th 2018 at 4:27:03 PM

Ivan, to Tobi: ~Hi, Tobi.~

Ivan: "Oh, that reminds me. I should probably introduce you to my team as well."

-Ivan reaches into his pocket and summons forth his team. Apollo and Artemis are less than happy to see the spider-like pokémon.-

Apollo: ~Dear Arceus get that thing away from me~

Artemis: ~Now, be nice, I'm sure he's oh no it can climb can't it~

-Ivan shakes his head.-

Ivan: "So! I'm ready to start if you are. What are we even going to be doing, now, anyway?"

PEFE HQ

-Naganadel stops in the hallway, coughing heavily, like he's hacking up a lung.-

-A black blob of...goo is spat onto the ground. Naganadel gasps for air.-

Naganadel: The...downside of...bodies...

This one's bigger...

-The blob suddenly starts writhing and...screaming?-

Naganadel: Desist

-He Dragon Pulses the blob, leaving nothing but a small dent in the floor.-

Naganadel: Unfortunate.

-The glitched Bulbasaur continues striding down the hallway, limping slightly.-

"Dang that sure is totally poggers my good bitch"

Geographic Society Office

Tobi: <I never really got the point of arachnophobia if you're not a cutiefly. I mean, are we really that off-putting? It could literally be worse.>

Tommy: Cut them some slack, Tobi, they're new. [To Ivan's Pokémon] Tobi is mostly harmless, I assure you.

Tobi: Tell that to your left lower arm.

Tobi scuttles into Tommy's bag, apparently looking for something.

Tommy: Cutting deep. Anyway, Ivan. Our first assignment is investigative fieldwork. We've been tasked to look into reports of a mysterious new masked villain team that attacked Interpol officers a few weeks ago.

As soon as he finishes, a deerstalker hat appears on his head, apparently placed there by Tobi, who scuttles onto his shoulders.

Tommy: Of course, we are under strict instructions not to actively seek them out, just look into the witness accounts and figure out what they are.

-Apollo shivers, despite being an icon of the sun.-

Ivan: "Hmm. I bet I can help with that."

-The sauce begins bubbling and emitting steam. Ivan covers it back up and puts it on a table.-

Ivan: "So when are we setting out?"

Geographic Society Office

Tommy: We don't currently have any leads so we'll be making a few phone calls here at the office. Of course, if you have a potential lead yourself, we could go check that one out. Did you happen to see anything unusual in the past week or so?

Vermillion Beach

Cupid deflates at the lack of a proper answer.

Human!Cupid: Aww....

Amber, however, puffs in annoyance at Colton's Lucariou.

Pidgey!Amber: <How does that work! If Cupid is usually a Pidgey, and I'm ususally a human, then wouldn't our bodies reverse at night! Us both being humans in the day and being Pokemon at night makes no sense->

She is cut off by the Xatu busting into her brain, which causes her and Cupid to reel somewhat.

Human!Cupid: -Somewhat spooked- Woah! W-What was that!?

Amber looks over to the Xatu

Pidgey!Amber: <G-Go? As In, you'd take us to where Rémy is?>

She puffs up.

Pidgey!Amber: <How is this not Stranger Danger? Creepy!>

Cupid and Sammerguy get very protective.

Human!Cupid: Y-Yeah! That's just kinda weird to just say you'd take us anywhere!

Sammerguy: -Hugging Amber- {Hark! We shalt protecteth the mistress at all costs!}

Edited by PippingFool on Oct 7th 2018 at 10:15:42 PM

I'm having to learn to pay the price

Nacht City Arena

-As Harold reaches the little trainer podium at the far end of the actual fighting area the lights go dark and a bunch of little orange lights appear in the stands (from fans who either have the 'official' lamp or the freebie video app on their phones)-

Commentator Larry: Making his way to the ring, the flame of the future, the driven hero, your Gym Leader... HELLFIRE!

-The pyrotechnics go off, lighting the arena enough to see Luke Van Luke at the top of the ramp, accompanied by an Incineroar, Magmortar and Blaziken-

Commentator Sawk: <There's your champs folks. Fat Cat, Abomination and Char.>

-The general reaction of the crowd seems... Hostile. Odd-

PEFE HQ

-Pent's been reading the posted messages-

This is the part where Shift would tell me to just fast-track the costume already.

And then I'd retort with the problem of not wanting to have my clothing vanish upon arriving at the party...

This is the part where /Duck/ is searching up affordable local fabric in a vague attempt at compromise

And I'm still talking about forging the sword properly... Shift brings up that why am I bringing an actual sword to a Halloween party. I respond by listing the stuff that's happened at every single Halloween party so far.

-Pent sighs and just flomps back onto whatever he'd been using for bedding here-

And then the party comes around and I've bought something generic from a discount store or slapped together a poor quality... Let's say supervillain costume... Because there's been no progress on what I actually want...

Edited by Pentigan on Oct 7th 2018 at 10:54:11 PM

It's clearly a case of backroom political albumizing.

Ivan: "Weeeelllll... I did meet a dude a bit ago. But my Healer Sense (or whatever power of mine it is) showed me that he was... not all human? He had some weird parts, like organ replacements. Like an entire fully functioning heart. Some other stuff, but I didn't get to ask about it. Does that fit the bill of "strange"?"

Geographic Society Office

Shutter peeks out from his cubicle.

Shutter: Mechanical heart? The kinds that make whirring sounds? By any chance, was that guy a double amputee with prosthetic hands? Yeah, I think I met a guy like that as well. Did he, by any chance, carry a bunch of doughnuts from that one store?

Jean arrives.

Jean: Pardon me for interrupting, if it's work you're doing. There's an upcoming event in a few weeks hosted by the Asimov Organization, a costume party and technology showcase.

Shutter: I was about to ask about that. I'll be taking a leave of absence to accompany my grandfather.

Jean: Was he the sculptor of the chocolate statue?

Shutter: Yes. Impressive as always.

Jean: Indeed. Now then, I need you two to cover the party for the Geographic Society; you, Thomas, will be assigned to cover the event for the Unovan edition. Ivan, you are on duty as his assistant throughout the event. You will be receiving press invites and will be eligible to enter the costume contest, as would I and the . I will be there myself as a VIP guest. The invites you receive will come with press kits and a little chocolate rocket.

Shutter: Asimov gives out the coolest stuff at their press kits.

Edited by MasterJayAM on Oct 7th 2018 at 8:13:29 PM

-Mezzo looks at her phone-

Mezzo: A costume contest, huh? Sounds interesting.

-Fortis looks up-

Fortis: Oh! I'm working on my costume right now!

-indeed, she is currently looking over one of her dresses with a pair of scissors in her hand-

Mezzo: ...Wait, "lack of illusions" is a category?

Pumpkaboo: <That's just being a bad sport.>

Mezzo: Hm. I should come up with an actual costume this time.

-...-

Mezzo: Oh hey, remember when Pokéstar Studios recruited me and Yin for that horror film? I should totally host a watching of that again. Maybe I can use the costume from it too...

Fortis: Nuh uh! That movie was too scary!

Mezzo: Fortis, it's Halloween we're talking about, it's supposed to be scary.

-Fortis shakes her head-

Fortis: Nuh uh! Halloween is about cute costumes and candy and trick-or-treat!

Pumpkaboo: <She makes a good point.>

Mezzo: Okay, I'll give you the candy bit, but no. It's about fear.

Do not fear power... fear those who wield it.

Ivan: "Hm. I guess, maybe. I'll see what I can do for a costume but I can't guarantee much."

-Ivan looks at Shutter.-

Ivan: "...Yes. Exactly like that."

As Silas would arrive, he would run into an adult man in an electric styled cape along with an Ampharos wearing a domino mask rush into the building.

"life is just a series of increasingly canon-eluding ao3 tags" ~ everydunsparce "Keep your hellfruit away from me, tempter" ~ also Every

Vermillion Beach

<No, no,> Lucario defended. <What he means is he can take you to get those doohickeys needed to keep transformations in check. It’d probably be less annoying than weremonism anyway,> he clarified, <since you can just get something that transforms you there.>

<Who?> Xatu asked. <Sorry, but I can only take you where I’ve already been.>

Meanwhile Colton is on his phone, looking at the halloween announcement. “Oh crap,” he mutters. “We have plans but we never got our costumes. Gonna have to get started when I get home.”

Edited by AbsentCoder on Oct 7th 2018 at 6:36:29 AM

[Insert Unoriginal Stinger Here]

Harold and Stylus saw the man run in, that had to be the Bolt. Stylus grinned a bit, <Seems familiar.>

"I don't condone vigilante action you know!"

<Don't care!>

Stylus noticed the hostile reactions and looked around confused, <Must be a heel fighter.>

Harold tossed out two more balls, out popped Tae and Ribbon, who proceeded to twirl.

"Ready to face off Luke?"

Jetta sighed, once again twirling her foot around on the floor. Really? They were going to try and keep this up? No taking of hints? No accepting defeat? No compromise?

"I, ah... I'm sure your editor is a determined man, yes, but... I-I mean, I don't mean to sound cocky, hehe*snort*hehehe! BUT... couldn't you settle for interviewing some other employee? I'm sure the company CEO back home would oblige! He's, ah, much younger and hipper and I'm sure more relatable, with the witty banter and the extroversion and the getting that new demographic..."

She pauses, looking back at Tommy, that fumbling, strangely charming fool who was clearly trying too hard- did she just think that? Stupid, stupid; she wasn't some cliche Tsundere, like in those stupid, stupid cartoons from Kanto she'd seen, and those stupid video games based on those stupid cartoons! And now her mind was rambling, evident in her sort of silently fumbling with her words before she'd even said anything, her pose frozen in place.

"Ah! It was, uh... pleasure to battle you, too! And just for the record, what I suggested is not, like... you don't have to do it!"

It was at that moment that she was interrupted mid-sentence by a catchy techno tune, emanating from the vibrating piece of primitive plastic she had in her pocket; she'd always been sure of one fact - not having a smartphone made people underestimate you. For no other reason would they do that! That particular ringtone was the one she had assigned to none other than her icy boss.

"A-ha! Yes, Executive Vice President? ...Museum? Wait, you're in Lumiose City right now? ...No, I never knew they held an Ice-Type Leaders' conference! They hold a Dark one to- okay, never mind... yes, I understand! I'll be there!"

Once she was off the phone, she turned back to Tommy. "Well, now that you mention it, I could use a lift, to the National Museum of Nationa- I mean, Natural History, with the fossils and the skeletons and the origin of all life on this world. ...They will have a Pokemon Centre nearby, right? ...Yes?" she asked, as her gaze drifted back to her two unconscious Pokemon that M-7 was busy scooping up and delivering them to one spot. Jetta offhandedly recalled them to their Poke Balls, but still focused her gaze on Tommy.

M-7 also focused his gaze on Tommy, raising a brow. He thought back to him, <'Indeed... of course, such a concern seems much more pertinent to you, Arachna-Guy. There were truly no rules back at the Game Corner, and we were winning, my friend. No masks, either. Hope the documentary works out for you!'>

"If you think like a child, you will do a child's work."

Stormchaser

Channah: -reads the Halloween invite- Welp, gotta find a costume I guess.

Titus: <Don't think I've ever seen you dress up for Halloween, Chay.>

Channah: Yeah, I hate Halloween, but y'know. There's gonna be snacks...

Titus: <Aaaah.>

There is no disdain in nature, there is no humiliation.

-Kai reads the newsletter-

Kai: ...My time has come. I do, after all, have a perfect replica of a certain mysterious masked thief's outfit to use.

Onabarrak: <By the gods, I thought you were kidding.>

Kai: I follow through with my word, Kaius.

Mason: Goddammit, they're gonna be dispelling illusions. I will not be defeated in this contest! I'll just have to do this the hard way.

Namine: <Please don't tell me you intend to cosplay. I wanted to get away from cosplayers.>

Mason: Namine, I'm afraid disguise is my specialty. There's no escaping cosplay when I'm around.

Namine: <Damn it all to Giratina's depths, why...>

Edited by BittersweetNSour on Oct 7th 2018 at 10:18:53 AM

Outside the Pewter City PMC

Zeke: "Well. Haze! Deal with him!"

He sends the Mantine back out.

Luciana: "Grafvitner, return. Ratatoskr, Zing Zap."

Zeke sent out Haze! Luciana sent out Ratatoskr!

Zeke: "Haze, Bulldoze!"

Ratatoskr: <Spark spark spark! KABLAMMO!>

Haze: <Eek!>

As Haze prepares to, well, bulldoze through the Togedemaru, she's pre-empted by an electrically-charged... charge into her, sending her flying backwards, out.

Haze Fainted!

Zeke: "Very well then! You've earned the right to see the more powerful half of my team!"

Luciana rolls her eyes.

Zeke sent out Lora!

Lora: <Alright, who needs a good knocking about?>

Ratatoskr: <TAKE THIS ZAPPY ZAP!>

Zeke: "Lora! Earthquake!"

Luciana: "Protect!"

The Infernape jumps up, slamming her foot down onto the ground, a crack spreading towards Ratatoskr. A protect barrier prevents Ratatoskr from taking damage, but she's still sent flying up into the air, landing with a bounce shortly behind where she was.

Luciana's phone beeps.

Luciana: "Halloween party... how am I on any of those mailing lists- oh well I can deal with that later. Ratatoskr, come -"

"!"

Ratatoskr is currently charging at Lora, sparking with electricity. She jumps, sailing through the air by sheer force of anger alone magnets, yo.

Ratatoskr: <aaaaaaaAAAAAAAA->

And is cut off by being roundhouse kicked into a nearby lightpole, causing the light to explode.

Lora: <Oh dear.>

Ratatoskr Fainted!

Luciana: "I didn't see anything if you didn't."

Zeke: "Riiiiight."

Luciana: "Svafnir, please deal with this."

Luciana sent out Svafnir!

Zeke: "Close Combat!"

Luciana: "Surf!"

Lora moves in, unleashing a flurry of blows into Svafnir, sending her skidding back.

Lora's DEF and SP.DEF fell!

Unfortunately, this doesn't KO Svafnir, leaving her in the red. And she promptly summons a torrent of water, crashing over Lora. With her current lack of heed for defence, this KO's her.

Lora Fainted!

Luciana: "Two-four me. Still optimistic about your chances?"

Zeke: "You've seen nothing yet!"

All are significantly abnormal in a normal world... All are significantly normal in an abnormal world.

Nacht City Arena

-A pudgy black man, clad in a suit and round glasses, watches the match, his fedora pulled low so the brim hides his face.-

"Dang that sure is totally poggers my good bitch"

Vermillion City

cupid and Amber calm down

Human!Cupid: Oh! Okay.

Pidgey!Amber: <That sounds way more reasonable!>

Human!Cupid: Yeah! That way we can get a set for Miss Emilie and Remy too! You too, of course, Sammerguy.

Sammerguy: {Hark!}

Pidgey!Amber: <If he lets us visit, that is> >v>

Human!Cupid: ...

He looks back to the Xatu.

Human!Cupid: Okay mister Xatu! Take us to the place where we can get the things!

I'm having to learn to pay the price