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Quotes / Mix-and-Match Critters

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Katara: (reading a newspaper) The king's having a party tonight for his pet bear.
Aang: You mean platypus-bear?
Katara: No, it just says, "bear."
Sokka: Certainly you mean his pet skunk-bear?
Toph: Or his armadillo-bear?
Aang: Gopher-bear?
Katara: Just... "bear."
Toph: This place is weird.
Avatar: The Last Airbender, "City of Walls and Secrets"

Cat-Bug is a cat, but he's got bugness in his veins
Man-House lives within himself with thoughtful human brains
Neither one is equal
To the challenge of the freak we'll
Call the Bee of the Bird of the Moth.
They Might Be Giants, "Bee of the Bird of the Moth"

"The Great Roe is a mythological beast with the head of a lion and the body of a lion, though not the same lion."
Woody Allen

"It's this big, owlish, bearish thing. Big deal. I can play that game too. "'Watch out for the hawklion! Beware the vulturetiger! Don't worry too much about the sparrowspaniel!'"
Lore Sjöberg, "D & D Monsters Part II"

"Why would anyone crossbreed a perfectly serviceable bear with an owl? ... A bear is already a dangerous predator; what benefit is there in breeding it with a smaller, weaker, less frightening creature? What should we expect next? The dreaded bunnywolf? The ferocious penguinlion? Perhaps the terrible ducksnake?"
Vaarsuvius, The Order of the Stick, #322

Tarquin: Gentlemen, welcome to the Brontosaurus Express! Beats walking back to town, huh?
Roy: Isn't a "brontosaurus" really just an apatosaurus with the head of a different dinosaur?
Tarquin: And a hippogriff is really just a horse with the head and wings of a bird, but I've still got eight squadrons mounted on the damn things.
Rot: Hmm. Fair enough.

"I'm merely improving upon God's flawed designs!" Nedroid replied, "I mean, what's better? A boring, ordinary cat? Or the mighty CATBLADE!?"

All the creatures around here suck.
We need to make 'em cooler.
So the theme will be
We'll mix and match this and that to create
whole new things no one's ever seen before!
I dub it the 'Fascinating Chimera Project'.
Let's reconstruct and modify stuff slowly and steadily.
A message from Porky Minch in a Pig Mask notebook, MOTHER 3

On a tiny little island
in the ocean called pacific
there's a mixed up group of creatures
who are really quite horrific
mixed together with whatever crap
was found or could be grabbed
re-invented in the bowels of a lab
Spliced theme song

"I'm sorry, no. I won't take it. If we accept orc zombies, we open the gate to all kinds of crap. What's next? Centaur dragons? How about demon fairies? Maybe buffalo elves? Heck, why not whale vultures? I'm going to make a stand for plausible monsters everywhere. Who's with me?"

Float by,
Drift through my dreams,
Whalemingo! (Whalemingo!)

In the sky,
Likes strawberry cream,
Whalemingo! (Whalemingo!)

You take a whale,
You drop the "fla",
Keep the "mingo",
That's how I named it
Whalemingo! (Whalemingo!)

If you see a big, pink whale
With feathers and a beak
And skinny little legs, then bingo,
That's a whalemingo! (Whalemingo! Whalemingo! Whalemingo!)
Buford, Phineas and Ferb, "When Worlds Collide"

"I'm looking at this from every god-damn angle there is! I can't tell where it starts and where it ends!"
JonTron reacting to a bootleg creature he dubs as "Abomination".


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