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Quotes / Award-Bait Song

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"Turn this song on and close your eyes. You can see it, can't you? The blond woman in the recording studio, eyes closed, hand holding one side of a set of headphones to her ear (she probably calls them cans since she's 'in the biz'), warbling into a mic with a big round pop screen while her lip quivers with emotion, a giant screen in the background playing a montage of scenes from Symphony of the Night, none of which are really at all connected with the song. It's all just so damned 'the hit single from Disney's latest masterpiece' that half-way through you've already forgotten you were fighting Dracula with a giant floating crucifix two minutes ago and now you're just waiting for Peabo Bryson to join in on the last verse right before the credit comes up informing you that the soundtrack is available on Columbia Records and you should buy the Bantam book. Big shout out to Kenny G for helping out with the music there."
Will of Error Macro describing "I Am the Wind" (this also qualifies as Hilarious in Hindsight because Cynthia Harrell is actually African-American.)

"I love songs about horses, railroads, land, Judgment Day, family, hard times, whiskey, courtship, marriage, adultery, separation, murder, war, prison, rambling, damnation, home, salvation, death, pride, humor, piety, rebellion, patriotism, larceny, determination, tragedy, rowdiness, heartbreak and love. And Mother. And God."

"We know it's immature, and I was so ready to lose the Academy Award, but not to Phil Collins."

The Nostalgia Critic, in his crossover review with Paw and Oancitizen on Les Misérables's obvious attempt to win Best Original Song with "Suddenly".

"This song I've written for you is so schmaltzy, it'll make 'Moon River' sound like a farting orangutan."
Homer Simpson, The Simpsons, "A Star is Torn"


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