Funny / The Jungle Book

As a Moments subpage, all spoilers are unmarked as per policy. You Have Been Warned.

The original Kipling stories

• Father Wolf’s first encounter with Mowgli provides a laugh: on the hunt, Father Wolf hears something approaching through the underbrush. He jumps at it right when it comes into view… and tries to stop himself mid leap when he realizes it’s a Man-Cub. The result is that instead of leaping forward he leaps up nearly five feet in the air and lands where he started. It’s a funny visual.
• Kaa, the oldest being in the Jungle, complaining about Ye Goode Olde Days.
  Kaa: I have to wait and wait for days in a wood path and climb half a night on the mere chance of a young ape. Pssha! The branches are not what they were when I was young. Rotten twigs and dry boughs are they all.
  Baloo: Maybe thy great weight has something to do with the matter.
• Kaa is noted as being a bit hard of hearing. Bagheera notes that the monkeys called Kaa a "toothless yellow earthworm"... and has to keep reminding him of the right term because Kaa keeps messing up the name.
  Kaa: Besides, they called me a speckled frog.
  Bagheera: Worm—earthworm, and yellow to boot.
• In "How Fear Came" from The Second Jungle Book, Mowgli's Digging Yourself Deeper moment after accidentally insulting Baloo.
  Mowgli: I have no long fur to cover my bones, but—but if thy hide were taken off, Baloo—
  Baloo: Man-cub, that is not seemly to tell a Teacher of the Law. Never have I been seen without my hide.
  Mowgli: Nay, I meant no harm, Baloo; but only that thou art, as it were, like the cocoanut in the husk, and I am the same cocoanut all naked. Now that brown husk of thine—
  Bagheera: Worse and worse. First, Baloo is to be skinned, and now he is a cocoanut. Be careful that he does not do what the ripe cocoanuts do.
  Mowgli: And what is that?
  Bagheera: Break thy head.
• Also in "How Fear Came", as Hathi tells the "Just So" Story about why animals fear Man, Bagheera occasionally butts in with some Deadpan Snarker commentary.
  Hathi: In those days there was no drought, and leaves and flowers and fruit grew on the same tree, and we ate nothing at all except leaves and flowers and grass and fruit and bark.
  Bagheera: I am glad I was not born in those days. Bark is only good to sharpen claws.
• In "Letting In the Jungle", Bagheera gets a little too excited about scaring humans, jumping around like a playful little kitten. After Mowgli rescues Messua and her husband, Bagheera sticks around to scare Buldeo just for kicks.
  • Even funnier is the Mood Whiplash Bagheera has on learning about this. In much condensed form:
    Mowgli: We're going to destroy the village and let the jungle overtake it.
    Bagheera: What in the world!? This is cunning beyond even my intellect, and as vindictive as I've ever seen out of man!
    Mowgli: ...wanna help scare Buldeo?
    Bagheera: ...yes, please!
  • Another funny thing about Bagheera: Kipling says the thing Bagheera used to scare the villagers is half-playful and half "just saw a potential mate". In other words, Bagheera gave the entire village a fright with the two least violent vocalizations he could have used.
• "Red Dog" has Mowgli looking for Kaa only to trip over him. Kaa is irritated and angrily scolds him... only to recognize Mowgli and begin trading insults with him; Mowgli calls Kaa "Flathead" and deaf if he can't tell someone's waiting for him to get out of the road, and Kaa notes Mowgli's habit of throwing stones at him to get his attention. While making a comfortable hammock of his coils for Mowgli to sit in and tell him why he trampled over him.

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