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Total posts: [16]
1

Are these unfortunate implications?:

My first conversation!

So my Magnum Opus is supposed to be a shonen ai novel known as Crushed. It's been bugging me for a while, but there are a few characters I have that I fear might have a lot of Unfortunate Implications to their name. They are Joseph Williams, Kevin Chang, and Lydia Rodriguez.

JOSEPH WILLIAMS:

KEVIN CHANG:
  • Positive/Neutral:
    • Is a Republican.
    • Is at least part Asian.
    • Is very intelligent.
    • Is gay.
    • Is a hard worker.
    • Loves his boyfriend Tyler unconditionally.
  • Negative:
    • Is catty, rude and arrogant.
    • Is pretty much a male version of The Libby.
    • Is the only Asian in the cast.
    • Is the only Camp Gay character.

LYDIA RODRIGUEZ:

I'm also afraid that I've got characters trying too hard to avert UI:

  • Toby Hutchinson, the Adorkable, Straight Gay protagonist, who is trapped in a Transparent Closet in the first book. He has few stereotypes of male homosexuality besides loving pink and musical theater.
  • Maya Daniels, Toby's best friend. She's a huge Yaoi Fangirl, but she doesn't constantly obsess over boy-boy love, despises the Rape Is Love stereotype, and defends Toby at all times.
  • Tyler Thompson, The Ace, good at every sport but loves soccer the most. Is terrible at basketball. Is the very definition of Straight Gay (as in, you'd never tell he was gay until he hit on a cute guy, possibly with a cheesy pick-up line), is a Nice Guy, a Sassy Black Man...oh yeah, did I mention that he's black?

I'm wondering if any of these are UI or trying too hard not to be UI. I want to make sure there are things I can improve on.

CONSTRUCTIVE CRITIQUES ONLY! NO "THIS WHOLE CONCEPT SOUNDS TERRIBLE, DON'T EVER WRITE IT!" AND NO RACISM OR HOMOPHOBIA!

edited 4th Mar '12 10:50:38 AM by CJCroen1393

 
 2 Mr AHR, Sun, 4th Mar '12 11:12:19 AM from ಠ_ಠ Relationship Status: A cockroach, nothing can kill it.
Ahr river
If you want to avert UI, try and make sure to show traits in more than one person, and have them come out in different ways.

Also, homophobia and racism are KINDA...against the rules ish, to a certain extent, so for future references, you don't need that disclaimer.
Also known as Katz
I honestly don't know what you're concerned about; you've got a diverse cast that doesn't align with any stereotypes that I'm familiar with. In particular, I wouldn't worry about someone being the only person of that race; your cast is finite and there can't be a large representation of every possible demographic. (If it was "the only woman" or "the only minority at all, " that might be a problem, but obviously it isn't.)

If you're leaning towards anything it's Five-Token Band, but even that is hardly ever a problem, in and of itself.

That One Troper Guy
My rule of thumb is, if you're a little squeamish about something you're writing, chances are that some people are going to be offended. I don't really see anything wrong with any of those names, but if you do, someone else probably will. Just food for thought.
Do loafing!
[up][up] [up]

Thanks for the critiques!

I also just forgot that Maya is part Filipino so Kev's not the only Asian in the cast. ^_^'
 
 6 Morwen Edhelwen, Mon, 20th Aug '12 10:34:00 PM from Sydney, Australia
Tolkien freak
I think CJ is worried the characters' traits may have unfortunate implications, not their names.

edited 20th Aug '12 10:42:54 PM by MorwenEdhelwen

The road goes ever on. -Tolkien
Hilarious injoke
The unfortunate implications lie in the fact that an objectification of homosexuals is your Magnum Opus.
If you find the text above offensive, don't look at it.
 8 Morwen Edhelwen, Tue, 21st Aug '12 4:13:18 PM from Sydney, Australia
Tolkien freak
@thelostcup: Can you explain where you saw "objectification of homosexuals" in CJ's post?
The road goes ever on. -Tolkien
 9 Collen, Tue, 21st Aug '12 6:48:13 PM from it is a mystery
vilent waler
Thinks that Girlon Girl Is Hot.
I'm not sure how this counts as a 'negative' trait, unless it leads to overt perverseness and makes everybody uncomfortable.

edited 21st Aug '12 6:48:26 PM by Collen

 10 Deviant Braeburn, Tue, 21st Aug '12 6:52:16 PM from Dysfunctional California
Wandering Jew
[up][up][up]

....what?
Everything is Possible.

But some things are more Probable than others.
JEBAGEDDON 2016

 11 Nick The Swing, Tue, 21st Aug '12 10:07:26 PM from Ya really wanna know? Relationship Status: Dating Catwoman
BFS Enthusiast
I'm kind of unsure about some stuff that I think may be Unfortunate Implications too.

Would it be okay if I shared these things I'm concerned about?

edited 21st Aug '12 11:52:09 PM by NickTheSwing

 12 nrjxll, Tue, 21st Aug '12 10:20:14 PM Relationship Status: Not war
[up][up][up]Actually, that's the sort of thing I'd call "objectification of homosexuals". So yeah, I'd call that a negative trait, although I have trouble seeing how often it'd really crop up in the story.

 13 Mr AHR, Wed, 22nd Aug '12 9:58:06 AM from ಠ_ಠ Relationship Status: A cockroach, nothing can kill it.
Ahr river
Enjoying something / thinking it's attractive does not make it objectification. It can be, but not necessarily.
 14 Tehpillowstar, Wed, 22nd Aug '12 11:40:55 AM from the Land of Pillows and Stars Relationship Status: Hugging my pillow
Soft and fluffy
If you feel unsure about something, the best is to slightly tweak it.

One of my antagonists/deutagonist (Like...Prince Zuko from Avatar the Last Airbender...) is partly from the Middle-East, but I avoid stereotypes and subvert them by not caring.
"Life is eternal; and love is immortal; and death is only a horizon; and a horizon is nothing save the limit of our sight." -R. W. Raymond
Wow...I didn't think anyone cared about this post anymore...

Well, for starters:

1. No, Joseph isn't overtly perverted, he's just a guy grin. He usually just blushes and stares/nosebleeds when it happens but nothing bad.

2. I'm worried more about traits, tbh, but Kevin and Lydia's last names do have me a bit worried.

3. I think thelostcup meant the fact that it's a yaoi series. I disagree with his/her opinion but I respect it and won't argue with them. That's how flame wars usually start. To be frank I don't think it'll be my Magnum Opus anymore...I'll still work on it but I recently got an interesting idea that I think would be somewhat easier to publish first. I might make a page for it but I'll have to brainstorm it first.

4. @Nick The Swing. I think that would be a good idea.

edited 4th Sep '12 6:40:38 PM by CJCroen1393

 
 16 Nick The Swing, Wed, 19th Sep '12 8:08:53 PM from Ya really wanna know? Relationship Status: Dating Catwoman
BFS Enthusiast
...never mind.

edited 27th Sep '12 3:33:16 PM by NickTheSwing

The system doesn't know you right now, so no post button for you.
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Total posts: 16
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