Video game lessons learned the hard way

Mark Of The Ninja: Be careful around lasers. Sometimes they don't raise an alert when you're caught in its path — because you will be dead on the spot.

Skyrim

• don't underestimate the Forsworn; their mages love to take a werewolf down from 40% to 0% before you've even noticed. goes double for Briarhearts that are too high-profile to be cheesed via pickpocketing their stupid pinecone hearts right out of their chests
• you can totally use the Abandoned House from the House of Horrors quest as a makeshift player house when you finish; the chests and dressers are safe containers, iirc, and the bed is unowned
• dwarven ruins are far more worth the time and effort to raid, especially if you plan on boosting your Enchanting (dwarven constructs like dropping filled soul gems)

Garry's Mod Prop Hunt:

• Don't get discouraged off the bat if you do get stuck! (This is a good example of why not to be demoralized when ya get stuck.)
• Being a small prop isn't the only way to go, but try not to knock that vending machine over, ya ox!
• You only get one grenade, ya forgetful hunter!
• Prepare the SMG while you are blinded. Trust me, it'll make you ready to mangle foes.
• Close the door behind ya! That will hopefully slow the prop in the room enough to possibly fill it with holes.

Mario Kart 8:

• Keep a shell or banana to drag behind you at all times. Especially on 150cc, it's only a matter of time until some dick blindsides you with a red shell. (This happened literally last-minute on the Flower Cup.)
• Expect to drop three or four places every time a shell hits you on 150cc. Hope there's enough time left to catch up.
• Karts drift slower and wider than bikes. Keep that in mind before you fall off the first turn of Shy Guy Falls again.
• Sweet Sweet Canyon in name only, for it is none of those things.

Dark Souls 2:

Archers will kill you, usually when you are healing or about to attack, lead enemy's to areas safe from archers before you fight them.

Bladestorm The Hundred Years War: Sure, it's a Koei Tecmo/Omega Force joint, but if you go into this game trying to play it thinking it's a Dynasty Warriors clone, you're gonna get wrecked.

Square/X and Triangle/Y are your special attack buttons. R1/Right Bumper is your basic attack...and you have to hold the button down. Button Mashing will get you nowhere.

edited 26th Jul '14 12:34:16 PM by WillyFourEyes

Fire Emblem Thracia 776: The game has a reputation of being the Nintendo Hard-est in the series. Just because you were getting fine levels in the first few maps, don't think that'll be enough to see you through on its own.

TL;DR: don't get cocky.

Borderlands:

• Eridian weapons, though they may pack some power, tend to run out of ammo fast.
• In multiplayer games, don't you ever freakin' lose hope until the last member of the team dies.
• Bloodwing likes to derp around a fair bit. If he's flyin' circles around your foe, recall him with the action key and save yourself headache.

Deadlight:

Stop pressing A too many times, dumbass! The game likes to que up your inputs.

Xenoblade Chronicles

• Even if they look the exact same, slightly bigger usually equals Unique Monster. That's not a Colony Upa, doltwad.
• Krabbles take a bit to kill if you can't get their defenses down. Naturally, you won't be able to do jack to a Unique Monster Krabble that's a few levels higher than your party.
• M32 Scout Units are Vision-type Mechon, but unlike most Vision-type critters they don't attack you when they see you. Nope, they run off to notify the nearest large group of Mechon and then attack you.

Makes for great xp if you already have a good level advantage over most Mechon already.

Shovel Knight: The choice to break a checkpoint and loot it is the dumbest you can make. Money's not worth a potential restart of the entire damn level.

Indeed, though I'd rather take on a few small groups than one of around seven or eight.

Not that a large group is hard to take out, though.

Civilization V:

• If Askia Mohammed asks you to open your borders to him, don't.
• Buying tiles does not automatically give you their resources. You need to pick which tiles to work.
• If you're going to bribe all the city-states to vote you World Leader, wait until the vote is 1 turn away. Also, don't just declare war on notorious bribe-mongers to lock in CS allegiance. Declare war on EVERYONE. Go to hell, Harald Bluetooth.
• Religious units spawn in alignment with the religion of the city, not necessarily the one you founded.
• Cities for cities' sake are a bad idea.
• Battering rams need backup.
• Building tall can be a good idea. Building singular, not so much:
  • If somebody's Great Prophet blindsides you, you can kiss your religion goodbye.
  • Your endgame science slows wayyy down.
  • Regardless of your Culture intake, any one city's borders only expand so far.
  • Participation in an international event becomes an all-or-nothing affair. And if two events are going on at once? Have fun with that.
• Refusing a joint war declaration doesn't hurt you. Agreeing to one might please the civ that suggested it, but it still makes you a warmonger.
• You see that option for a captured city in between "Annex" and "Raze?" Might want to try using it sometime.
• Not many civs like a warmonger. Even other warmongers.
• Nobody likes a warmonger who lies about it.
• Wiping out a city-state is basically crossing the Moral Event Horizon.
• Religion is a tool to bolster your chosen pursuit of victory, not the primary means thereof.
• Explore the map. Seriously.

edited 1st Aug '14 12:00:15 AM by ABNDT

Battlefield4

• Anti-Tank Mines strapped to your jet are probably a bad idea
• But damn, if it isn't amazing when they go off.
• UCA Vs should not be fired indoors. Unless, of course...
• Frontal knife attack never works. Ever.
• Incendiary weapons work both ways

Warframe

• Never attempt to take on Councilor Vay Hek solo.
• The lasers in the Orokin Derelicts are OP

edited 1st Aug '14 1:29:01 PM by ZeroDarkFlirty

MIND Zero

• If a game appears to be based on Persona, chances are it's also going to take after Persona's difficulty.
• You pick expert difficulty? You're getting a lesson in humility every time you meet a new level.
• They already gave you half of the elemental advantages system. If you know water beats fire and air beats earth, it doesn't take a scientist to figure out that means that earth beats water and fire beats air.
• MIND Break is no laughing matter. Using your last bit of MP as a shield only helps if you expect to get healing that turn, it could very well be game over material otherwise.
• Resource management is the name of the game. Finishing a battle with a good TP supply is just as critical as finishing a battle at all, otherwise you may not survive your next encounter.
• The naming system is very inconsistent. What could be a healing item for you could instead be a party-wide attack buff for them.

Fist Of The North Star Kens Rage

• The last mission in Rei's Legend Mode isn't a big deal. Unless you want to S-rank it.

Flash shmups:

Bubble Tanks series

• When traversing the grid, move in a spiral pattern. You'll be at less risk of losing bubbles from getting hit.
• Heavy Killers will easily kill your bubble count if you're a huge, slow heavy tank. Hence the name.
• BFT Carrier (heaviest) is more effective than Ghost Sniper (lightest) due to better DPS.

Enigmata 2

• Get the Reflector asap if your ship doesn't have it. Or else everything will be a pain on later levels.
• Get the Time Stop asap and upgrade it whenever it's available. Or every boss after Mega-Goliath (see below) will give you pain.
• Get both the Infinite Bonus and Bonus Lock so that you will never have to keep with your weak weapon.
• Bonus Killers are the worst things in the game, which cancel your bonus weapon no matter what.
• Mega-Goliath is a massive Wake-Up Call Boss. You'll need lots of energy and health replenishments, good luck.

edited 1st Aug '14 2:49:08 PM by ironcommando

Xenoblade Chronicles

• If there's an enemy on your radar that you can't locate? Look up. You might find something.
• The Monado does not warn you of enemy auto-attacks.
• You can fill your Collectopedia at any point you wish. So hold on to any rare items you find, or else you'll waste half an hour looking for a Fossil Monkey to no avail. For example, that example is in no way or form related to my gameplay experience.
  • Also, said rare items are likely not traded normally, and you'll have to overtrade for one.
• Clear inventory clutter frequently. Gems can begin to be a chore if you don't do much with the ones you get.

JJBA Heritage for the Future

• Joseph's AI is really annoying.
• Time Stop is a bit difficult to pull off on its own and even harder during a match.
• New Kakyoin isn't really all that much better than old Kakyoin and in some ways is actually worse.
• Just because they're weak in the manga doesn't mean they're weak here, see Hol Horse and Alessi who both can be pretty cheap.
• Chaka gets stand crushed very easily and being stand crushed hurts, that said in skilled hands he's beast.
• Dio can be really easy sometimes, but othertimes he can be a right monster especially if you get guard crushed easily. Beating him with chaka was pretty difficult because of this.
• Midler's chomp chomp super hurts bad
• Against Kaykoin with meter always have your stand out because emerald splash super chips more than a pringles factory.

edited 2nd Aug '14 12:34:23 AM by Vertigo_High

Dark Souls:

• In Blighttown, what doesn't poison you or eat you breathes fire.
  • Except for those guys that throw rocks at you.
• Don't buy arrows. Don't buy a lot of arrows. Buy all of the arrows. You will run out while cheesing stuff.
• That Rusted Iron Ring from the Asylum is awesome.
• Y'know that spider-lady-spider that spits lava, has a fire sword, and farts fire? Yeah, it's immune to fire.
  • And probably poison, but I don't know for sure.
• Maneater Mildred is clinically retarded. She isn't totally useless, though, at least until Quelaag puts a puddle of LIQUID FIREY DEATH VOMIT THAT YOU SHOULD NOT STEP IN in front of her and Mildred decides to wash her feet in it.
• Quelaag loves to plant her big spider butt in front of your camera and blind you while you're running from her in terror.

EDIT: Hit Send by mistake while typing. Damn phone.

edited 2nd Aug '14 3:41:05 PM by Knowlessman

pro tip for quelaag

Summon Mildred, then shoot Quelaag's human body with arrows. Every arrow to that spot stuns her, and you can partially stun lock her while Mildred chips away at her.

Borderlands:

• Those boxes in Sledge's area? Yeah, you can get stuck behind an ammo box if you open it from behind!

Bioshock:

• The Leadhead Splicers get really goddamn annoying once you reach Hephaestus.
• You'll never run out of grenades and never have enough Electric Buck.

Luigi's Mansion: Dark Moon:

• That fucking bomb cannon has a pathetic movement radius.