Quotes / Rated M for Manly

Anime and Manga

Banchou. When I was young, they were honorable men. Today that meaning is obsolete. They will silently extend a hand out for the weak. They will fight to the very end, even if there were a hundred, a thousand opponents, they will stand firm against them. An honorable man who protects their companions... "BANCHOU", a man among men.
— A Yakuza lieutenant, from Kongoh Bancho, one of the manliest manga ever made.

If the strength of your equipment isn't strong enough, then compensate for it with the strength of your arm! That is the way a true man lives!
Kogarashi, Kamen no Maid Guy

Fan Works

There was a stony, painful noise as Hamilton gritted his teeth, shaking his head. “I do not stand alone. Mun, you may speak for the empire and the heavens. But my words,” he said, forcing himself up, despite the onus of his chains, “are backed with hot blood!” An aurora of scarlet light burst forth from Hamilton’s breast, blinding his divine foe. He pushed his shackled arms forward, plunging them into the stream of light. “And MANLY! FIGHTING! SPIRIT!”

Film — Live-Action

We are men, thou and I.
Henry Rider Haggard, King Solomon's Mines

Film — Animated

"(Be a man!)
We must be swift as the coursing river
(Be a man!)
With all the force of a great typhoon
(Be a man!)
With all the strength of a raging fire
Mysterious as the dark side of the moon"
— "I'll Make A Man Out Of You", Mulan

Music

Heaven loves ya, the clouds part for ya
Nothing stands in your way
When you're a boy
Clothes always fit ya
Life is a pop of the cherry
When you're a boy"
— "Boys Keep Swinging", David Bowie

Every man ought to be a macho-macho man
To live a life of freedom, machos make a stand
Have their own life style and ideals,
Possess the strength and confidence, life's a steal
You can best believe that he's a macho man
He's a special person in anybody's land
—"Macho Man", The Village People

Literature

Hither came Conan the Cimmerian, black-haired, sullen-eyed, sword in hand, a thief, a reaver, a slayer, with gigantic melancholies and gigantic mirth, to tread the jeweled thrones of the Earth under his sandalled feet.
— "The Phoenix on the Sword," Robert E. Howard

Web Original

Get fucking fired up. No ... I mean it. Shoot yourself full of Toradol, get red in the face, and GET FIRED UP, GOD DAMMIT. You see this chair? (throws chair) I’M NOT LEAVING THIS STADIUM UNTIL BLOOD HAS BEEN SHED AND WE HAVE WALKED OUT OF THERE WITH ALL OF THE ENEMY’S GOLD AND WOMEN!
Drew Magary, "How to Give a Ball-Bursting Football Speech"

There were only two men in this world that made me wish that my chromosomes were double X so we could get some triple X action going so I could bear their children, and those men were Hulk Hogan and Arnold Schwarzenegger. As a child, those two were the best role model one could ever wish for. Larger than life, fought off evil, killed by the thousands. Every Saturday my eyes would be glued to the television screen with as Hulkster would run wild in the afternoon, and Arnold would come on screen to terminate past bed time. Yes, just thinking back on it makes me feel ever more fertile already.

You don't read the books or watch the movies looking for surprise plot twists — this is comfort food for hard-drinking assholes who wish they were tough guys but wouldn't want to seriously risk their lives, and I reckon I'm probably one of those.

At no point does the movie take itself seriously, nor is it even apologetic. It knows exactly what it is and accelerates full steam into an hour and a half of blood, guts, sex, drinking, smoking, and chugging beer out of skulls.

Gruff, antisocial loners who smoke, fight, and defy the authorities... It’s the definition of badass. As for that overwhelming demand, Kojima was kind enough to give people what they wanted. Here you can see one of the bonus features, where players get to control Cyborg Ninja, giving the fanboys a raging Solid Snake in their pants.
Terry Wolf, "The Selfish Meme"

This is a man who has crippled dozens of offensive linemen and starred in three movies that have the N-word right in their titles... Fred Williamson could kick your ass so hard that nine months after you die, your wife would give birth to his foot. Full-powered Fred Williamson attacks are the second ingredient in Taco Bell ground beef... If Fred Williamson made John Carter, it would have been called Spaceman Brown: Chocolate Motherfucker, and it would have turned a $250 million profit.

The next bit, though, is completely original to the show...this dude hangs up the phone, opens up the dumbwaiter, and GETS HIS STERNUM BUSTED TO HELL by Wolverine coming out holding a bottle by the neck. Wolverine then walks over to the dude, looks at the bottle, says 'Lousy year' and then drops it right on his junk. Then he casually grabs a turkey leg on his way up to go murder people. It is... the best thing.
Comics Alliance on X-Men, "The Inner Circle"

Some rooms have hidden exits that'll lead you to secret rooms full of goodies. You'll need to discover all of these, as well as pick up the keys that spawn in the game every so often, to earn access to the Pleasure Dome. And what is the Pleasure Dome, you may ask? Well, it's a secret room where the floor cycles through a bunch of retina-burning colors, while bikini-clad women can be collected like the cash and gold bars you've been picking up throughout the game. Totally worth it.
Hardcore Gaming 101 on Smash TV

The Space Marines don't have a cover button, for the same reason they carry guns instead of white flags made of frilly lace panties. Health recovery is via execution — if you take a second to kill an enemy with a particularly brutal move, you recover health. That's badassery as a core gameplay mechanic. When you're about to die, your impulse reaction becomes 'diving at the enemy to destroy as many as possible' and 'wondering why that's not always the case.' It's made very clear that if you ever have full health, you're not doing it right.

I'd swoop down from on high, machine gunning racists, then jump off and kick the last survivor off the ledge and feel like Errol fucking Flynn. I was almost afraid of landing, in case I got bounced away on balls like a couple of hairy space hoppers.

And on the day Masaaki Endoh was born, the heavens rained holy fire of manliness and guitars. Jesus himself down and proclaimed that he was the Christ of Manliness, here to bring the coming age of Manly to the world as the second son of our lord, as the human son of God himself, no middleman. Here he is, teaching us the ways of the Book of Man, which he wrote himself in the year 2012 as he kicked away the meteorite that was goin to kill us all. WE MUST LEARN FROM HIM! MASAAKI MOTHER FUCKING ENDOH!!!

"It is said that there are two things ubiquitous in the Imperial Guard: the standard pattern lasgun, and a pair of steel balls."
Anonymous poster on 4Chan's Traditional Games board

Web Video

Indiana Jones is the epitome of what all men strive to be. He's handsome, he's intelligent, he's single, sleeps around, he's got cash, he punches people, he travels the world, he can sleep with any of his students, he uses a whip, he punches people, he bangs his students in the locker room, women love him, he goes on adventures, he punches people, he can shoot people and get away with it, and so on!

OOC: Uh, Jay, tell us why you like Blackman?
Jay: a) Because he's great, and b) well I don't even need a b) 'cause the a) was so great!
V1: You can't even argue with that.
Jay: I think he's cool. He's a white ninja. (I was gonna say MK3 Sub-Zero.) His complete lack of charisma means boundless charisma; just went so far down 0 that he's a 10.

Let me put it in perspective for you: Picard faced the Borg, and after it was done ruining his life, he stood in his office and drank Earl Grey.

Sisko faced the Borg and after it was done ruining his life, he fumed in an escape-pod — then went off to design a ship whose only purpose is to kill Borg. It's a set of guns strapped to an engine. Then he called it Defiant, a name that practically shakes its fist at the Borg. That was his second choice; Starfleet felt that the U.S.S. Ben Sisko's Muthafuckin Pimp Hand was too long.

Sir Ron, what brand of chainsaw do you use to brush your teeth?

Predator. How could this be bad? It's fucking Predator! You look at the cover and think, 'Yeeeah. This game's gonna be awesome. This is a real man's game. This game will turn you into a sexual tyrannosaur' — like me.

"Manime", that's the term. Like really, really, any anime that's just about, like, manly men fighting, and it's full of like, muscle, and testosterone. If there is girls in it, they are at least half-nude or they have ginormous knockers, they're badly drawn, and it's, uh, great. Manime. It's gotta be at least a little bit of, uh, y'know, sentimentality to the fights. Let's say that the protagonist and the villain have, like, a crying moment together, where they're like, "You are the best fighter ever", and it's like, "I know, Ryu", or "Kenryu-sama, we were brothers. You were my true opponent.", and they all like, cry, and they punch each others' heads off, while some eighties anime music's going on that sounds like American Rock, but it's full of like, Engrish, so it's just like "BURNING HOTTO! DEALING THE NIGHT TONIGHT! KAMINE SHINO SHIGA!". You know, it's Manime, I love shit like that.
Joel, Vinesauce

Western Animation

Animator: (rejecting a cartoon rabbit) Maybe something a bit more manly.
(He draws an overly muscular, Rambo-style rabbit.)
Rabbit: (screams) PREPARE TO FRY, YOU INSIGNIFICANT SLUG!!!
(The rabbit torches the drawing board with his flamethrower. The animator puts out the fire with his coffee.)
Animator: Never get him past the Parent-Teacher Association.

Real Life

They made it evident to every man, and to the king himself not the least, that humans beings are many but men are few.

On-screen he held so much authority so that he was not being ironic when he explained his theory of acting: 'Don't act. React.' John Wayne could react. Other actors had to strain the limits of their craft to hold the screen with him.

Most people are either too enthusiastic about manliness or too dismissive of it. They think that manliness is the only virtue, and all virtue, or they think it is the last stupid stereotype, soon to be as dead as a dodo. To study it well, the trick is not to get carried away to either extreme.
Manliness by Harvey Mansfield.