"Hey, we made cancer airborne and contagious! You're welcome. We're Science. We're all about 'coulda,' not 'shoulda.'"
Patton Oswalt, Werewolves and Lollipops
"Science brings gifts of convenience
To the modern man
Modern man then continues
Continues to expand
But what happens when man creates
Something oh so wrong?
Nature bites back in a big way
Good heavens, what have I done?!""
—The Aquabats!, "The Cat with Two Heads!"
"Once ze rockets are up, who cares vere zey come down?
"Zat's not my department," says Wernher von Braun.
— Tom Lehrer, "Wernher Von Braun"
We do what we must
because we can.
For the good of all of us.
Except the ones who are dead.
Doctor: Your past is littered with the mutilated results of your unethical experiments!
Rani: I had all I can take of that cant in our university days. Am I expected to abandon my research because of the side effects on inferior species? Are you prepared to abandon walking in case you squash an insect underfoot?
Crell Moset: "Ethics" are arbitrary. How do you suppose your own database was developed, hmm? My God, half the medical knowledge acquired on Earth came through experiments on lower animals!
Doctor: But not people!
Moset: It's convenient to draw a line between higher and lower species, isn't it?
Doctor: This is the 24th century, Crell. Your kind of barbarism ended a long time ago. Or at least, it should have!
—Star Trek: Voyager, "Nothing Human"
There is no such thing as "Good Knowledge" or "Evil Knowledge". There is only Knowledge. Morality is when you decide not to use it.
"Whenever something's done 'in the name of science,' it always means trouble."
Frank (Describing opening the tomb of Anck-es-en-Amon)... But when it came time to handle all her clothes and her jewels and her toilet things... Well, when it came time to unwrap the girl herself...
Helen (Incredulous) How could you do that?!
Frank (Chippily) Had to, science you know.
"Being a scientist means never having to say you're sorry."
The Creature: You make sport with my life!
Victor: In the cause of science!
— Danny Boyle's Frankenstein
Republic Scientist: No! We're nothing like you! What we did had meaning, it was for science!
Operative Bator: Ah, science: that convenient bastion for the truly amoral.
"Since when did people start expecting science to be humane? To study the body, you cut it open. To study the mind, you isolate it by crushing the heart. Historically, that's how science has advanced.".
— Serph Sheffield, Digital Devil Saga 2
"This was when science didn't have to have any specific purpose."
"What a fine day... for science!"
— Dexter, Dexter's Laboratory
Lisa Simpson: Mr. Tatum, do you mind if I swab you with this damp rag?
Drederick Tatum: No, not at all. Swab away. ... Whoa, whoa, nobody mentioned a beaker.
Lisa Simpson: Please? It's for science.
Drederick Tatum: Oh, for science. In that case, proceed.
— The Simpsons, "Bye Bye Nerdie"
Sally Impossible: What could possibly be more important than your son?
Richard Impossible: Sssssssscience?
— The Venture Bros., "Twenty Years to Midnight"
Tia: Professor, how could you let Maxim do something so dangerous?
Prof. Lexis: How could I stop him? Man versus Sinistral... What a fascinating experiment!
David Rossi: They were human beings.
Mason Turner: They were transients and drug users and prostitutes. They were useless to society. I gave them the chance to be part of a cure. To be of use. That's science.
— Criminal Minds, "To Hell..."/"...and Back"
This is for the benefit of all mankind! Science is Justice!! Science is Truth!!
"The fact that it actually seemed a credible threat nonetheless proved no deterrent to Merrick's burning experimental quest... He was unsteady with trepidation, shivering in the chamber's humid, blasting heat, more apprehensive on this occasion than the first time he had encountered one of these things. Was this because he knew what he was doing was wrong? He couldn't afford to think about that. He had to proceed. There would be no second chances at this, and he had to know."
"Scientists are like children told not to look in a particular room... Once their minds are set upon it, nothing will mean so much to them as their desire to uncover whatever is locked to them. No matter how disastrous the possible consequences, they regard their work as paramount, as though the pursuit of science constitutes its own moral imperative... Scientists pride themselves on objectivity, but they cannot be trusted to be objective when it comes to the morality of their own conduct."
— Cardinal Tullian, Pandaemonium
"That's the funny thing, I didn't have a reason. I fully understood no matter what I did my life would be ruined. I could either do it with the science or without, and so I chose science to see if I could. When you have the power to do something, it's hard not to try."
— Shou Tucker, Fullmetal Alchemist
You're desperate to put your mind to use, Ed, to see what you're capable of, to put the world under your fingers. That's the essence of alchemy. You did it for knowledge. Control. Above all, you did it just to prove you can.
— Shou Tucker, Fullmetal Alchemist
Howard: And as long as we're talking about betraying our friends, how about the month Sheldon spent grinding up insects and mixing them into Leonard's food?
Sheldon: Wh - exCUUse me, that was not a betrayal, that was an experiment to determine at what concentration food starts tasting... mothy.
Leonard: You put moths in my food?!
Sheldon: ...For science.
"Science isn't about why, it's about why not? Why is so much of our science dangerous? Why not marry safe science if you love it so much? In fact, why not invent a special safety door that won't hit you on the butt on the way out, because you are fired! Not you, test subject, you're doing fine. Yes, you. Box. Your stuff. Out the front door. Parking lot. Car. Goodbye."
— Aperture Science CEO Cave Johnson, Portal 2
"I'll be honest, we're throwing Science at the wall here to see what sticks. No idea what it'll do."
— Cave Johnson again, Portal 2
"I defeated a raccoon! SCIENCE!"
— M.O.D.O.K.'s win quote against Rocket Raccoon, Ultimate Marvel VS Capcom 3
(as Doc Brown and Marty are hijacking a train)
Engineer: Is this a holdup?
(beat as Doc and Marty look at each other)
Doc: It's a science experiment!
— Back to the Future Part III
"I... was defeated by my drive to become a scientist. I lost the last time, too. I've injected Jenova's cells into my own body! Heee, hee, hee! Here are...... Heee, hee, hee! ...my results!!"
— Hojo, Final Fantasy VII
Next, they tell me you people are conducting some anomalous materials research that could result in a Resonance Cascade. So, I'm shutting that down before you idiots end the world. ...A resonance cascade- You're supposed to be scientists! Use some common sense.
— (Black Mesa!) Cave Johnson, Perpetual Testing Initiative DLC, Portal 2
That's because to him, the fruits of his own research are everything, far more important than the Organization or the battle in our own country.
— Rimuto, Claymore
You would risk an apocalypse out of sheer curiosity!?
— Master Eraqus, Kingdom Hearts: Birth by Sleep
Look too hard for one thing and you miss everything else. And then, the people around you get hurt in the process. Like Xehanort. His single-minded thirst for answers created Ansem. We all have a little of that curiosity in us... So if we're not careful, any one of us could create an Ansem.
"When science is on the march, nothing can stand in its way!"
— Paul Bartel, Amazon Women on the Moon
"Science never sacrifices itself. It is always murderous."
— Jean Baudrillard, Simulacra and Simulation
"I felt it myself, the glitter of nuclear weapons. It is irresistible if you come to them as a scientist. To feel itís there in your hands. To release the energy that fuels the stars. To let it do your bidding. And to perform these miracles, to lift a million tons of rock into the sky, it is something that gives people an illusion of illimitable power, and it is in some ways responsible for all our troubles, I would say, this what you might call "technical arrogance" that overcomes people when they see what they can do with their minds."
— Nuclear physicist and mathematician Freeman Dyson explains how it feels
"This is the best data EVER!"
— Grant of Mythbusters, doing bungee jumping
"You might as well have said, "Hey, we just made cancer airborne and contagious. You're welcome! We're science! We're all about 'coulda', not 'shoulda'."
— Patton Oswalt, on a 63 year old woman giving birth, Werewolves and Lollipops
""Will Relativistic Heavy-ion Colliders Destroy Our Planet?", the rebuttals to which were basically, "Let's turn them on and find out!"
Snake: Did you invent Metal Gear?
Otacon: Yes, as a weapon of love and peace! It fires flowers and rainbows and turns incoming warheads into puppies and butterflies!
Snake: Sounds about right, if by "flowers and rainbows" you mean "nuclear missiles."
Otacon: Oh no, how could it be that I've invented a weapon specifically for the purpose of filling everyone with warm fuzzy joy and never once realized that it was better suited for dropping nuclear weapons on faraway nations!?
Snake: My guess would be it's because you're a big idiot.
Empirical data's your only man, when formulating a research plan.
A soldier's death is never in vain if it makes the formula more plain.
A few dozen make a better case for refining that third decimal place.
They call me Zombie because I don't sleep, as I slowly struggle to climb this heap,
of corpses, data points, and trials, but from the top - I'll see for miles!
— Zombie's forum signature
"Oh, Pyriss! Though minds concerned with the follies of human existence might see your life as a tragedy, I must maintain my scientific detachment, and see your agonized existence for what it is: My Rosetta stone! Your genetic structure will finally unlock all the secrets of the Devouring Earth to me! The world has no idea what waits for it, but you, you shall be here to see the dawning of a new day for SCIENCE!"
— Werner Von GrŁn, City of Heroes
"The one thing you have to learn with science is that if you stop to ask yourself if you should do something, you've already lost faith in thinking that you can do it."
— Dr. Shelly Percey, City of Villains
"Don't worry, I'm doing it FOR SCIENCE! and that makes everything okay."
Sharp stopped walking and turned to the scientist. "So what good is this information to us?" he asked with some annoyance.
"Well..." Lee paused, "as pure science itís fascinating" he said. "Not everything we do should have a military application surely?" he asked then looked awkward.
"Then we proceed, blindly, in the noble pursuit of science and knowledge."
— Xaldin, Those Lacking Spines
Merasmus: (in regards as to why RED Medic has a BLU Spy's head in the fridge)... Interesting. Why have you kept the head alive?
RED Medic: For SCIENCE!
Merasmus: ...That's not an answer,
Gil: Okay, my turn. You've got a lot to learn about talking to patients.
Agatha: Oh, but, science—
Vespiary Girl: We'd better get those notes. Otherwise you Sparks will want to experiment on my weasels.
Tarvek: Only for science...
"Back off, man, I'm a scientist."
— Dr. Peter Venkman, Ghostbusters
"Seriously, Betty, you know what this meteor could mean to science. If we find it, and it's real, it could mean a lot. It could mean actual advances in the field of science."
—Paul Armstrong, The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra