Funny / Todd In The Shadows One Hit Wonderland 2014

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Specials

Marc Cohn - "Walking In Memphis" (1991)

• His reaction to Starlight Express, with someone in a strange costume rollerskating around singing about diesel engines.
  "The hell am I looking at?"
• Todd trying to understand how Memphis is inspirational for music:
  Todd: Truly just a profoundly important part of American music, and it's hard not to feel a profound sense of spiritual uplift when you hear music from the great city of Memphis.
  Juicy J: ♪They call me the Juice when I'm at the strip club\ I put down a hundred or a du-uh-uh-uhhhb\ It don't matter to a player I'm a stu-uh-uh-uhhhd\ Cause when I leave the club I'ma fu-uh-uh-uhhhck♪
  Todd: That came out after "Walking in Memphis", but I'm sure Cohn finds it just as inspiring.
• "Now I've never been to Memphis personally - the closest I got was watching Hustle And Flow, which made it look like kind of a shithole..."
• "Really, the song is a super-effective Memphis tourism ad. ♪Take a vacation in Memphis\ Walk out on the street with an open cup of beer\ It's awesome drinking in Memphis\ And don't go anywhere else except Beale Street because there's nothing else there.♪"
• This bit:
  Marc:: ♪Tell me, are you a Christian, child?♪
  Todd: Well, Muriel, here's a hint: (Cut to the record cover. Mark Cohn's surname is highlighted, accompanied by Hava Nagila, with a Star of David and a menorah photoshopped onto the cover.) Actually, from what I can tell, Cohn is kind of agnostic. But at that moment in Memphis, he felt touched by God, or...Elvis. Same thing, I guess.
• Todd envisioning Elvis having a sex life in the afterlife:
  Marc: ♪They just hovered round his tomb\ But there's a pretty little thing\ Waiting for the King\ Down in the jungle room♪
  Todd: Yes Elvis is still having skeevy groupie sex in the afterlife. She's probably underage too. (thumbs up)
• Responding to Cohn's next single, "Silver Thunderbird", by calling a Thunderbird "the butt-ugliest thing I've ever seen" and mentioning that it is "the size and shape of the Weinermobile".
• "'True companion' and 'make love' don't seem to belong the same sentence. 'True companion' is what people call their dogs."
• "He was outrocked by Sheryl Crow, for God's sake."
• "Marc Cohn didn't really have a Sussudio in him. ...Not that that's a bad thing."
• Todd's awkward ending.
  Todd: And who doesn't like walking in Memphis? Um...go Grizzlies.

OMC - "How Bizarre" (1995)

• Everything involving That Dude in the Suede and his attempts to bring actual knowledge about New Zealand to a profoundly disinterested Todd, culminating in Todd giving a hyperbolic description of how New Zealand mourned the sadly deceased lead singer, and Suede not even knowing he was dead.
• Overanalysing the secondary chorus:
  Pauly Fuemana: Every time I look around/It's in my face.
  Todd: What? What's in your face? And if it's there 'every time you look around', it can't really be that bizarre, can it?
• When finding out that Lucy Lawless is a featured artist on OMC's later "4 All Of Us", he's surprised that she can sing. Cut to Xena: Warrior Princess's Kiai. "(Doesn't count.)"
• Todd finishes by saying that, now that Pauly is gone, the rights to the story of "How Bizarre" are probably available again, so someone should buy them so we can finally find out what happened after they drove off at the end of the music video.
  Todd: I'm sure it's fascinating.

The Floaters - "Float On" (1977)

• The Bait-and-Switch at the beginning making you think he was going to review a Modest Mouse song.
  Todd: Yes, in case you thought Anchorman was a parody of the 70's, now you know that there was, in fact, a time where guys could plausibly say in public, "Let me take you... to Loveland".
• The verse structure for "Float On" is as follows: one of the band's vocalists introduces himself by his astrological sign and name, then says what he loves in a woman, followed by the chorus, and repeat. It's almost the perfect format for Todd to mock.
  Charles Clark: Libra. And my name is Charles.
  Todd: [Audibly smiling] Hi, Charles.
  Charles: I like a woman... that's quiet.
  Todd: [In a smooth voice] Shut up, ladies.
  • His sheer joy when the song gets to Larry and Larry's desires. Worse still, because the man was born on June 23, he gets maybe the worst icebreaker imaginable.
    Larry Cunningham: Cancer! And my name is Larry.
    Todd: [Trying not to laugh] Hi, Larry.
  • Todd briefly mentions Cheech and Chong's comedy single, "Bloat On", a loving ode to fast food. He gives it a little polite laughter before adding, "It's an easy song to parody."
• Did they deserve better?
  Todd: **laughs**

Pras - "Ghetto Supastar (That Is What You Are)" (1998)

• The episode makes a running gag of how Pras can't seem to release a song that doesn't sample another one that's far better known (an inversion of Sampled Up).
  • Starting off with a guest verse on Wyclef Jean's "We Trying To Stay Alive"
  • Then his hit with one of Wyclef's proteges, John Forte, sampling "Electric Avenue"
  • "Ghetto Supastar" itself sampling "Islands In The Stream"
  • The next single sampling the theme song from Grease
  • The next one sampling "Do You Really Want To Hurt Me"
  • Finally, a single off a later album sampling "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For"
• When introducing the song and its context, Todd mentions "the elephant in the room." Cut to the video's political-rally intro. ^note (The elephant is the mascot of America's Republican party, though Bulworth himself was a Democrat.)
• Todd wondering why more rappers don't try to emulate politicians:
  Todd: Who is a bigger gangsta than a politician? Why do people want to be Scarface? Because he had the money, the power, the respect, the women, the impunity against the law? You know who has all that in real life? Duh! Politicians!
• Todd pointing out that even on the only hit single in his solo career, Pras is still overshadowed by guest artists Mýa and ODB.
  Todd:: Because - and I cannot emphasize this enough - if you were trying to make your own name and you were trying not to be overshadowed? You would not be working with Ol Dirty Bastard.
• The entirety of Todd explaining Pras's terrible, mercifully short big-screen acting career.
  Todd: But what about Pras himself - how is he, in the movie (Turn it Up)? Well, um... you know how Warren Beatty was an actor who shouldn't rap?
  Pras: (Incredibly flat monotone) 'Kindagamesareyouplayin'. Comin'downlikeyouhaven'tbeengoneforthelasttwelveyears.
  Todd: ...Yeah, it works in reverse, too. Pras should've stuck to music, because he is the worst actor who ever lived.
  Pras: (While standing over the prostrate body of his own mother) Yescanyougetanambulanceherequick, um, mymompassedout.
  Todd: The WORST... ACTOR... WHO EVER LIVED. Worse than, like... worse than Tommy Wis - no, just worse than everything. THE WORST.
  Pras: Gotsomethin'Iwantyout'listento. Whenitcomesout, it'sgon'changeourlivesforever.
  Todd: He's perfectly passable as a rapper, but on film, he's just, like, this walking lump of cottage cheese, so I hope you'll forgive me if I didn't bother to research the rest of his filmography.
• "Did he deserve better?"
  Todd: I'll tell you what we deserved: another Fugees album.

Nine Days - "Absolutely (Story of A Girl)" (2000)

• After playing the song's verse as his piano intro, he sings the premise of One-Hit Wonderland to the chorus.
  This is the story of a band
  Whose career didn't go as they planned
  But while they never had a second hit, we absolutely love them
  For one song!
  • And then refuses to do the outro in the same way.
• Todd talking about Nine Days' background as the local band who hit it big, to the point where he calls them a real life version of Mouse Rat.
• Todd feeling "a little torn" on what he thinks of the song.
  Todd: It's basically a terrible, unimpressive piece of garbage. As a matter of fact, just about the only interesting thing about it is that it may be the greatest song of all time.
• Todd describing the song as something that could only have been popular in 1998, choosing to ignore the fact that it actually came out two years after that.
• His criticism that the song's chorus, while immediately catchy, promises far more than the rest of the song delivers.
  Todd: For one thing, it promises a story.
• And even the chorus has nothing new to say, as Todd cannot resist comparing the lyrics to those of the theme from The Mary Tyler Moore Show:
  Todd: It's just a cliché-ridden song about a girl, and I like her, and a lot of the time she's not happy, but when she is, [cut to Todd leaning against his keyboard in disgust] she turns the world on with her smile, takes a nothing day and suddenly makes it all seem worthwhile, [sarcastically] awwww. [mimes sticking his finger down his throat and gagging]
• Todd notes that the failed follow-up, "If I Am", has the same atmosphere as early 2000s Christian rock, and he futher observes that the band's name is stylised in all lowercase letters with no space between "nine" and "days" on cover art (another hallmark of Christian rock). He says this explains so much about the disparity between sales of the single and the album it led off - until he looks more closely at the album sales...
  Todd: Okay, this confirms it. Nine Days went into the studio and basically had everything that might make them even remotely distinctive scrubbed off of them. Which is probably why the single cracked the Top 10 but the album never even reached the Top 50. Which doesn't surprise me, who would buy this!? No wonder that album was only certified... gold... wait... wait, a gold record, that's 500,000 copies. [incredulous] Seriously, half a million people bought this? This?! [double Facepalms] Oh my God, we gave the record industry so much money back then. That wasn't even fifteen years ago! Christ, it's like I watched the fall of the Roman Empire!
• After learning that lead singer John Hampson became an English teacher after the band split up, he imagines him trying to work the song into his curriculum. Less than an hour after he posted the video, someone on Twitter found a video of exactly that.
• "Did they deserve better?"
  Todd: Well, let me put it like this: This was the story of a—no. No, they didn't.

Deee-Lite - "Groove Is In The Heart" (1990)

• His description of the song as the kind that makes you want to get up and dance. Even if you can't dance, because as he demonstrates with various clips, Deee-Lite can't either.
• When talking about his appreciation for Deee-Lite:
  Todd: I mean... I thought groove was in the butt. But here is this group upending everything I ever thought I knew about groove!
  Bootsy Collins: Groove is in the heart!
  Todd: It is.
• When describing his bafflement at how Deee-Lite seemingly dropped from the face of the Earth after the song.
  Todd: I have dedicated myself to finding out why exactly our hearts no longer had any groove in them. My guess... too much cholesterol.
• Todd notes that, as can be guessed by the band's name, they had a particular Verbal Tic.
  Todd: The name Deee-Lite was inspired from the Cole Porter song "De-Lovely." As a matter of fact, they did seem to like adding "de" to the beginning of words.
  Lady Miss Kier: How do you say, dee-groovy? / How do you say, dee-gorgeous?!
  Todd: That feels like it could get dee-annoying real quick.
• Related to the above, Todd admits that to a first-time viewer, the band could come off as annoying, even saying that "it really surprises me these people don't get on my nerves", putting as an example Lady Miss Kier's name. He then looks ups her real name, and discovers that it's actually Kieren Magenta Kirby, after which he says that "she actually kind of toned it down."
• Todd tries to rationalize some lyrics:
  Lady Miss Kier: My supper dish, my succotash wish
  Q-Tip: Sing it, baby!
  Todd: Succotash? Well, [label for Margaret Holmes triple succotash] I guess veggies would be good for your heart, and the groove therein.
• The line "We're gonna groove to Horton Hears a Who!" confuses him. Then he sees relevant footage from the 2008 film. It doesn't help.
• At one point, Todd appears to make a pass at Lady Miss Kier, only to immediately regret it.
  Todd: I know she picked a style intentionally designed to appeal to gay men, but as a straight guy... I could watch this lady all day and all night. [Beat] Glurgh, I'm an ape.
• Todd talking about the social "issues" sung in the second album.
  Todd: And that's not even getting into the bigger problem with that album, which is that they got a lot less "Deee-Gorgeous" and a lot more "Deee-Preachy".

Biz Markie - "Just A Friend" (1989)

• The opening, with Todd mimicking both the "YOUUUUUU" and Biz Markie on the piano.
• "He looked like a cartoon character. He sang like a dying walrus. He rapped like he just had his tonsils removed. And yet, he powered his way not only to a Top 10 hit, but to about 25 years of goodwill since."
• Todd gives a short overview of Biz Markie's song "Pickin' Boogers"...
  Todd: Ha ha! You're like, "what? He made a song called 'Pickin' Boogers'?" Yeah, sounds disgusting, right? Yeah, don't worry, this is not actually a song about picking your nose. No, you see, "Pickin' Boogers" is actually late 80s hip hop slang for, you know, being successful, making money...nah, I'm just screwing with you, it's about picking your nose!
• The whole episode has a lot of giggleworthy moments. Biz Markie just does not take himself seriously, and the world is a funnier place for it.
  Biz: OH, BEBBEH, YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU...
• "It's a story about being played for a chump, but unlike Fred Durst he didn't even get the nookie."
• Todd expressing his excitement over Biz Markie being on Yo Gabba Gabba!.
  Todd: Think about it...a whole generation of kids will grow up having been taught by Biz Markie. That just makes me proud to be a human being, you know?
  • The funniest part of this is that Todd loves Biz and his goofy charm, so he likely means this genuinely.
• Todd gets interrupted by a screaming kid.
• "Did he deserve better?"
  Todd: Abso-friggin-loutely. Biz Markie is an original. There's been none like him, and there won't be another any time soon. Yeah, he's a clown, but the world loves a clown for a reason.

Snow - "Informer" (1992)

• "Yeah, the '90s were a good time for rapid fire, hard-to-karaoke pop jams, but even people who can do 'It's the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine)' from memory without stuttering don't dare to take on 'Informer'. Not only does it go faster than Sonic the Hedgehog on cocaine, the words themselves didn't seem to make any sense. People might have assumed it was 'cause the song was from some foreign country, and they would be right, although that country was a little further north that they realize. They probably expected this to be from some dreadlocked Rasta, not a guy who looked like a forgotten 90210 cast member. And his name was Snow, for God's sakes. It was like he went, 'what's a name that'll get across as quickly as possible that I'm white and Canadian? Snow! Of course!'"
• Todd relates watching the In Living Color! parody with Jim Carrey on YouTube:
  Todd: [They] didn't think this guy was funny, they were offended. To them, Snow was a disgusting minstrel-show act who stole and watered down black culture, and embodied everything wrong with the hypocritical standards of a racist society and record industry. (Beat) ...Holy shit, that's a lot of heavy stuff to throw on "Informer", of all things! I was just looking for Homey the Clown videos, goddamn.
• The comparison of Snow's mild facial resemblance to Vanilla Ice by superimposing Johnny Bravo's pompadour on a photo of him.
• Todd is evidently Late to the Punchline regarding the Double Entendre in the album title 12 Inches of Snow.
  Todd: See, it's, it's a Pun. 'Cause it's a 12-inch record, get it? 12 Inches of S... [Beat; deadpan] It's a dick joke, isn't it. 12 In- I just got that. [Facepalms]
• Reacting to him delivering lines about getting strip searched.
  Todd: Yeah, not so hardcore. Lickey boom boom down, indeed.
• Snow's absurd claim that people say he speaks like he comes from Jamaica.
  Todd: Dude, that's not how you sound! We KNOW that's not how you sound! You don't talk like that; your parents don't talk like that! It sounds fake! YOU'RE a fake! Nobody buys it!
  Holden Caulfield: You're a phony! Hey, everyone! This guy's a great big phony!
• Todd's attempted deconstruciton of American's image of Canada as a "clean, magical place without poverty, crime, major cities or any other culture besides boring white people:"
  Todd: Of course I mean that was back then. Now that Drake's gotten big he's bestowing onto Toronto all his hardcore, dirty, gangsta street cr—[cracks up] Couldn't finish that sentence.
• About a cameo of one of the Trailer Park Boys (specifically, Bubbles) in one of Snow's later videos:
  Todd: (Awestruck) "My God, this is Canadian."

Blue Swede - "Hooked On A Feeling" (1974)

• It starts with the title card: Todd is Groot.
• Upon learning that the group's name is Blue Swede, he brings in That Dude in the Suede for his commentary again, only to be informed that the group is not named for suede and is in fact Swedish. Undeterred, Todd tries to get his input as a Swede instead. With predictable results.
• Todd is horribly confused by how this song is associated with "a talking raccoon, David Hasselhoff and a neurotic lawyer's fear of her own biological clock as represented by an animaged GIF of a terrifying dead-eyed baby".
• Todd "sure can't figure this song out, can yoooouuuu?"
• He names the lead singer as Björn Skifs, a name that he did not just make up, and his first band as the Slam Creepers, a name that he also did not just make up because it's ''too awesome''.
• Unable to find a video for Blue Swede's first single, "Silly Milly", he creates his own—by dubbing it in over a clip of the Swedish Chef.
• After going through Blue Swede stomping the crap out of plenty of old pop songs, he sees their cover of Deep Purple's Hush and says, flatly and unconvincingly: "honestly this is kind of awesome."
• "Did they deserve better?"
  Todd: Uhh... Sweden, you seemed to like the guy. You could've kept all this for yourself, honestly.

Michael Sembello - "Maniac" (1983)

• One of the most bizarre things about Michael Sembello is the first one pointed out by Todd: he got his start in music as a guitar accompaniment for Stevie Wonder, and worked on many of his big albums and songs from the 70s. Including "Superstition".^note At least in live performances; Sembello was not on the album version of that song. But if you want to hear him play on a #1 hit single, "Sir Duke" is a good option.
• When discussing Sembello's career with Stevie Wonder, Todd remarks that Stevie couldn't have hired Sembello for his looks. Cue many commenters pointing out that it would have been quite odd for Stevie Wonder to have hired someone for their looks.
• He attempts to make this a Halloween episode, despite admitting that the song's connection to the holiday is a stretch. It's still a good effort, considering the song's title, tone, original lyrics as a tribute to a slasher film, Sembello contributing to the Gremlins soundtrack, and ultimately the scariest part of the review: Ron Howard's moustache in the video for "Gravity".
• His attempt to dance/workout to the song resulting in him falling down in exhaustion.
• The mere existence of "Automatic Man". Todd understands perfectly well that nothing he could say would add to it.
  Todd: I believe in God now.
• His not-entirely-inaccurate summary of Cocoon as "the movie where aliens make old people horny."
• His dumbfounded "Hi buddy" upon seeing what Michael Sambello looks like.
• "Did he deserve better?"
  Todd: I think I have been enjoying the work of Michael Sembello in exactly the way it should be enjoyed. ... Oh god, this is one of the most glorious happy accidents in pop history.

Shawn Mullins - "Lullaby" (1998)

• Todd's impression of Mullins' speak-singing voice from the introduction ("Welcome back...to One Hit Wonderland...") on down.
• This Sarcasm Mode subversion:
  Shawn Mullins: Her parents threw big parties, everyone was there / They hung out with folks like Dennis Hopper, Bob Seger and Sonny & Cher
  Todd: So as you can see, this girl, she had it rough. No one should have a childhood that involves Dennis Hopper
  [cue clips of Dennis Hopper being Dennis Hopper.]
• When talking about his experience with Shawn Mullins's later project The Thorns, he is unfamiliar with third member Pete Droge. Complete with Doge lines over his picture.
  • His belief that Sweet Mullins Droge would work as an Unusual Euphemism.