Funny: Nancy Drew
- All of the phone conversations you can have with Nancy's friends are very funny.
- Heck, imagining all the screwball things Bess and George get up to while Nancy's off solving mysteries can be hilarious, especially as a contrast to the darker games.
- Any of the "Good News, Bad News" segments.
- The occasional "Blooper" stingers after the end credits.
- In the original version, if you call Eloise, you get to hear her answering machine message, where she is trying to figure out how to use the answering machine.
- Prop master of DEATH!
- Hotchkiss: I'm usually not much of a meat eater, but...very well: 50 drumsticks, please. Chicken, that is. Cluck. Cluck.
Hotchkiss: Ooooooh look, a peephole.Hotchkiss:.....shall I peep?Hotchkiss: OH I DO BELIEVE I SHALL PEEP!Hotchkiss: Where's my medallion? It fits! HIGH-FIVE TEAM HOTCHKISS!
- On that note, all of Hotchkiss's video recordings:
- "Hello wall, my name's Nancy Drew."
- You can find a bottle marked "Prograin: Extra strength hair treatment for men. Results may occur eventually."
- Nancy: You're not a people person, are you?Red: I'm here to see birds, not people!
- Harlan: "Sorry, I don’t feel like talking right now; my back’s kinda sore. Probably because someone just got done stabbing me there."
- Arglefumph's reaction to that makes it even better.: "OHH!!!! Sarcasm BURNS!"
- Nancy describes the fabled Cadborosaurus to The Hardy Boys:
Frank: What does it look like?Nancy: Like a very long, fat snake with flippers, a head shaped like a horse's, and a back that humps when it swims.Joe: That pretty much describes everyone you've ever dated, doesn't it, Frank?
- "Oh, no! She wrecked her roux!" And George just says it in the most melodramatic, sarcastic tone ever.
- Come on, it's just fun to poison Katie. What other game will let you feed someone a jellyfish peanut butter baking soda ice-cream sandwich?
- Bess: "You're there investigating phantom horses, and what are we doing? A big fat nothing! That does it, George. We're suing the airline."
- Shorty's attempt to yodel. Shortly after this, he storms off muttering his plan to become a gazillionaire.
- Half of Loulou's lines could count.
- Inadvertently scaring off Nigel Mookerjee by moving the statue of Mercury in the library.
- Delivering a second telegram to the Observatory yields this dialogue.
Nancy: Hello, Dr. Bob. I've got a telegram for Professor Randall.
Dr. Bob: I'll get it to him later. As you can see, he's a little busy at the moment.
Nancy: What's he doing up there?
Dr. Bob: He's undertaking the very delicate task of cleaning the lens-
Professor Randall: Uh oh.
(something crashes offscreen)
Dr. Bob: Randall, what have you done?!
Nancy: Hi, Doctor Bob. Woody got another telegram.
- While delivering a third, you can hear Woody sweeping up glass in the background.
- The fifth? "Dr. Bob, if Professor Randall still works here, I've got another telegram for him."
- And then:
Dr. Bob: I'll take care of it. Right now I must make sure Randall seats this new lens properly. [to Randall] I said, carefully rotate it about three degrees to the left-
Randall: Uh oh.
(something crashes offscreen)
Dr Bob: Randall?!
- Joe is able to cause of fit of giggles with one word.
Joe: It's not like it was written by Mark Twain or anything. (beat) What?
- About Hurley's letter:
- In Nancy's first meeting with Tino, he browbeats her into listening to a long, boastful story about arrests he's made. Both of Nancy's replies are delightfully snarky:
"I heard all they had was a knife from a carry-out chicken place."
"I heard they stopped because you accidentally rear-ended them."
- Nancy's attempts to say "Traquenard" are...nothing like French
- When Ned points out that Nancy is traipsing around the jungle studying bugs for free while the Hardy Boys are getting paid to hang out at the beach.
Ned: Nancy, if you're wondering what that thing you're holding is? It's the short end of the stick.
- If you've played enough of the series to understand the Continuity Nods, giving Mystico the wrong answers to his question is very funny. "So, Nancy Drew, what secrets from the beyond do you seek?"
A hint: "Ack! What do you think I am? An insurance salesman? A pair of underage detectives? A starstruck teenager? A washed up police officer? An elderly housekeeper? A parrot?"A reason for being: "Ack! Who do you think I am? A librarian? A witless actress? A retired schoolteacher? The hapless owner of a ski lodge? A kidnapped teenage reporter? A ne'er do well curator? A freaked out home owner? An amusement park owner? A tour operator? A ranch owner? A neighbour? A distant friend? A clueless socialite? A worried investor? An entomologist?"Some spice in my life: note "Ack! Who do you think I am? A gun-toting thug? A washed up actor? An antiques dealer? A diamond thief? An old man? An art aficionado? A hillbilly? An art director? A whale lover? A flannel wearing cuisiner? A snivelling brat? A quack? A social climber? A flaneuse? A two-headed monster?
- It's really only applicable if you're a fan of Doctor Who but the main villain being called Il Dottore (the Doctor) is quite amusing.
- This "Good News, Bad News" when you get caught snooping in Fango's office:
The Good News: The GdiF put up your bail.The Bad News: You have to be smuggled out of the country dressed as a goat herder. Baahhh!
- At the end of the game, when Nancy solves the final puzzle and goes after chasing The Black Cat ( Corine)...
Mel: You just entered my room through the wall! I demand an explanation!
- The Reveal that Kasumi deliberately hid her will so that only her two daughters could find it...and only if they worked together. This was a woman who had to mediate a lot of sibling fights.
- Nancy: How’s Joe?Frank: He’s great. He says hi. Oh also he wanted me to tell you something, hang on I had him write it down because it was too weird to remember… There we go, ‘Dear Nancy Drew’, he used your last name for some reason. ‘I am glad that you and Ned are back together. You go together like peanut butter and jelly. When you’re apart, it’s like peanut butter and sadness. Or jelly and uncomfortable silences. Either way, you’re looking at a sandwich that no one wants, and probably no one wants to buy it ever.’Nancy: That sounds very much like Joe.Frank: Oh you wish that was the end of the note. It goes on: ‘A world where Ned and Nancy are not together is as disturbing as it is dangerous to the quantum makeup of our interstellar plant of reality-’ You know what, I’m just going to stop reading there.
- Bess lamenting her overindulgence in ice cream at the end of Alibi. She's watching a suspect at the ice cream store, and to keep her cover up she had to keep ordering ice cream. All through the day. It's even funnier if you never ate ice cream when playing as her.
- The credits scene where Frank calls and- having discovered the culprit's true identity and fearing for her life- makes a desperate confession of love to Nancy over the phone...only to be cut off by the answering machine. And later, his sheepish retraction of said confession.
Deirdre: Hey you know, you should volunteer at neurological study places, because you have been knocked out a lot, my friend.Nancy: I'll keep that in mind.Deirdre: Maybe not the safest place to keep it in your case.
- In The Deadly Device, you can ask Ryan to help distract Victor so you can snoop in his office by getting him to yell at her. After a few times of this she draws a graph of how it's negatively affecting her personal well-being, complete with doodling in the margins that involves a frowny face, a dog on a skateboard, and a dragon.
- Hell, just Ryan in general. Try asking her for a second gummy bear.
- Hotchkiss, as always, is full of these.
- Asking Wade about his Dark and Troubled Past.
Nancy: Is it true that you have a questionable past?Wade: You asking if I really went to jail? Yeah. I don’t recommend it.Nancy: Why not?
- In the game's finale, the eponymous mansion catches fire. Nancy's recorded even this in her journal, despite ostensibly running for her life.
- Despite the fact that it's a very dark game in general, the messages on Jessalyn's phone are really funny - mostly because Clara's autocorrect is acting up:
- Clara: DID YOU GET THE INVERTEBRATESJessalyn: What?Clara: INVERTEBRATESJessalyn: Mom, that does not clarify thingsClara: NO, INVERTEBRATES!!!!Jessalyn: I'll make a note of that. No invertebratesClara: I am sending this PHOTOGRAPH BACKWARDS!@!!Jessalyn: Okay. I hope that works out for youClara: I am typing slowly, and angrily.
- Before they start shifting into Nightmare Fuel, Jessalyn's phone recordings are very funny.
Addison: Remember when Elizabeth got married and we all watched romcoms and ate caramel corn? I was just thinking, at no point that evening was I like, 'I'll die here!' It just didn't come up.
Jessalyn: All my life I'd been told that Harper was crazy.Harper: What a coincidence! Me too!
- The Easter Egg conversation you can have while making Harper a cart in the finale.
Ned: Hi, Nancy!Nancy: (casually) Thornton Hall's on fire.
- Nancy can find Samantha Quick's passport in Zoe Wolfe's hotel room, revealing that "Samantha" is one of Zoe's aliases.
- "I'm sorry I burgled your house."
- Moira's sarcastic tirade about old people.
- Alec talking with Nancy about her luggage.
Alec: I gotta say, if you're so attached to your mom's jeans, why'd you take them on an international flight?Nancy: Those are mine.Alec: Oh....Alec: You look nice today, he said with a hopeful smile.
- At the end, Carson sits down to tell Nancy how he met her mother.
"Yeah, you'd better sit tight. This'll take about nine seasons..."Carson: You remember that filing cabinet you picked?Nancy: Which one?Carson:...I'll pretend I didn't hear that.
- An injured George falling asleep in the middle of talking to you.
- Sonny Joon. Every single thing he says.
Sonny Joon: You've been a member for a few years now.Nancy Drew: Do most of the members [of S.P.I.E.D.] not know they're members?Soony Joon: Yeah, that's, like, item number one on the list of things to fix.Nancy Drew: What are the benefits of membership?
- Kiri declaring herself a Pacific Run 'superfan'.
Nancy: Really? You seem a bit...smart.Kiri: I'm smart all day. At night, give me someone falling down and a bag of popcorn.
- The show announcer's gradual descent into frustrated snarking.
- In the closing letter, Nancy cheerfully tells Ned that she's coming to kidnap him, and to keep his windows open. note
- This entry in Nancy's diary:
Locked tablet entries? This looks like a job for Nancy "One Woman NSA" Drew.
- Grigor provides a good deal of comedy by being the game's Deadpan Snarker; the letter he writes at the end of the game is both hilarious due to the idle tone it's written in, and sad because he's talking about how Thanos is going to murder him.
- Some of the bickering that the cast members engage in during their rehearsals is fairly amusing if you listen to the recordings, not least because Xenia's so preachy about others' godawful performances and yet refuses to acknowledge that the actual script is lame too.
- "Nothing says I love you like a new murder tool."
- Interestingly enough, that quote comes in handy. During this game, it's revealed that Nancy forgot her anniversary with Ned. Deciding to make it up to him, she decides to buy him a gift from the Culture Center's gift shop. One of the options is an "Original Replica" Viking Sword. If you save up and buy the sword (which isn't cheap,) the ending letter mentions how much Ned absolutely loves it, saying he takes it everywhere: to parties, football practice, even to shower.
- In her journal, Nancy ponders one of the series' greatest mysteries:
Why aren't I getting paid for this?...Why don't I ever get paid?
- A friend's utterly cavalier response to Dagny's breakup with her girlfriend:
Terribly, terribly sorry to hear that. Condolences, plenty of fish in the sea, single and ready to mingle, no time like the present, you're an absolute gem, et cetera!
- Dagny realizing what Gunnar's nickname for her means.
I hate this town.
- Dagny asks Nancy her opinion on the treasure's rightful owner. One of the options?
Nancy: Give it to me!
- Nancy's kleptomania becomes increasingly blatant:
"I don't know whose boat this is, but I'll just...borrow it for a little while."
- The opening of his 'Nancy Drew Rap'
Warning: This video contains spoilers for the first 22 Nancy Drew games.
- Failing the dancing minigame in Design. "Well, ahm sorry!"
- At one point in Alibi in Ashes Alexei gets mad at you as Bess for breaking a vase in his antique store as soon as you walk in. He simply tries to shoo you off if you attempt to talk to him again. This exchange occurs:
Bess: You're really mean!Alexei: I can live with that. Now go make friends with the outside world!Michael: Oh wow... Let's try talking to him again.Alexei: Out!Michael: (Does it again)Alexei: Out!Michael: What's the opposite of "in," Alexei?Alexei: You again!? Get out!Michael: Oh, oh, aww... I thought he was going to say "out" again!
- Seeing him freaking out over the minigames in Secret of the Old Clock is simply hilarious. It's very odd yet funny seeing Michael, a typically mellow and nice kind of guy, freaking out over losing mini-golf and being unable to do the sewing game right. It gets even funnier with the chase scene at the end.
- Specific moments: In the sewing game, during one of the failed attempts, his mouse glitched and sent it flying left and right all over the place. And during one failure at the chase mini-game, he yells EESH! SQUEESH! AJA!!
- His Let's Play of The Oregon Trail. "I KILLED NANCY DREW?!"
- During part 10 of The Final Scene, his drifting off topic while talking about the Blackmoor family.
"Okay, well, what is supposed to happen is that Brady disappears to, uh...do whatever Brady does, write a letter to Jane Penvellyn, maybe...You know, I actually had to look up Jane's name in order to make that joke, that's a reference to Nancy Drew: Blackmoor Manor and, uh- I don't believe this! I checked on Wikipedia, and somebody's written a whole history of the Penvellyn family. Somebody has way too much time. They've got like a three-page article with the generations of the Penvellyn family going back- going to twenty-four generations. Somebody's got way too much free time. And this is from a guy who's made, like a hundred Nancy Drew videos, okay? Way too much free time! I'm sorry, guys."
(Gasps) Great googly moogly!
- And about a minute after that, in response to a certain discovery:
- "AAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! LEAVE THE MANSION NOW? OHHHH, I'M AFRAID!!!!!!"
- His reactions to Connie not impressed with him being the student of the month in September.
B-but I was the student of the month in September! Connie thinks I'm a self-centered jerk! (starts sobbing) Oh, this is not awesome anymore...
- His explanation to the reason why he's "Student of the Month" in the game (It Makes Sense in Context) degenerates into "Ten minutes of freaking out later..."
- Hearing him read through most of the opening letter for Shattered Medallion in a "tough German guy" voice, then belatedly realize it's Bess who wrote the letter and he has to switch to "perky girl" instead.
- When showing off the death sequences in The Phantom of Venice, one of the "Good News, Bad News" endings for getting caught snooping in Fango's office is "The Good News: You only spent half a day in jail. The bad news: you spent the other half on the phone getting chewed out (and fired) by Prudence Rutherford."
Michael: Aw, man! Chewed out by Prudence Rutherford? I wouldn't want that to happen to me. [with Prudence voice] "Nancy, I'm entirely ashamed of your behavior! I hired you to catch these criminals, not get arrested and join them in prison!"
- In part 21 of Alibi in Ashes, he dramatizes a threatening message Nancy's just received by cutting to Beauty and the Beast's mob scene.
- To entertain viewers while solving a tedious word game, he shows footage of his pet cat sleeping. While unfitting music plays.