Your group's jokes.

Every NPC who is a mayor turns out to be a bad guy (in the form of sending us on a quest while withholding important information).

Well "every" is actually only two, but apparently that's enough for the GM to change one NPC's title from "Mayor" to "Lord" to make clear that yes, that one is a good guy.

Spoiler: Turns out he's the Lord of Dicks, and screws you guys over in the end!

Actually, that's hillarious. When the reveal goes through that the NPC is actually evil, he'll remove his fake non-mustache and his title will change to Mayor.

edited 31st May '15 9:36:29 AM by TheyCallMeTomu

No, we're now done dealing with him and nothing bad happened. He even agreed to welcome in his village the exiled lycanthropes we were helping in the first place.

It's just all part of his plan! He's playing the long game!

our Medic, Leon, keeps nearly drowning and ending up shirtless. We still cant tell if the GM is doing it on purpose and he wont say.

The first incident is happenstance, the second is coincidence, and the third time is enemy action. How many times has the medic ended up shirtless and drowning?

so my character was raised by halflings and I decided to "why not" and give her ranks in Profession: Chef and Craft: Food.

so now it's our thing to take /time/ to see what she makes for breakfast and how that tweaks party dynamics, if it puts our Grumpy Gnome in a good mood or not. I've started bringing a /cook book/ to game, if not actual food.

Twice have I joked about four-player groups being The Penguins of Madagascar, and while the first time wasn't entirely apt (Private wasn't the naive Nice Guy), the second time it was spot on.

My group makes constant references to a game that was essentially Jump the Shark: The Game.

- "So I want to travel back in time five minutes so I can get the parking space that bitch took."

- "Roll to dodge Belgium"

- "We are three, a half-cyborg half-steampunk time-travelling mad-scientist, a skeleton-demon prince of hell with enough charisma to talk anything into bed, and an extremely mad nazi engineer obsessed with created the most efficient device known to man. We, are bonded in mutual-aid, we, are the Trifarce!"

- "And then the accountant turned out to be the second-coming of Jesus Christ, who ended up sending Cthulhu to the Moon."

- "The Trifarce conquered the world, and each of the three claimed a slice of the planet. Except Australia. Nobody wanted Australia."

- "X, GILF hunter" Where X is an influential Vampire

Since my GM wanted to spice up the beginning of our adventure beyond "You all meet in a Bar", he made us meet in a strip club/ brothel instead. Since the only female in our group was attractive, out-of-work elf the rest of us just assumed she was a stripper. We ribbed her about this a few times over the course of the session. Later on that player griped about how little starting cash we had and I piped up and said "This is why you started stripping!"

edited 24th Apr '16 2:59:09 PM by Greeneyre

My Rogue Trader Campaign has a Navigator with famously bad luck on his rolls, which is starting to become a meme.

edited 24th Apr '16 7:10:17 PM by Protagonist506

The group I GM fought a gang of skeletons. Five of them were killed quite easily. The last one, however, they kept on missing turn, after turn, after turn. Eventually I, as GM, declared said skeleton was carrying a shield in order to justify their terrible aim. It is now a running gag that shields are my group's worst enemies, and anytime an enemy who is actually carrying one shows up, they freak out.

At some point in a Fading Suns game, we found ourselves aboard a luxury space yacht that came equipped with "a spa" (by which we meant, a jacuzzi). Ever since, when it came to ships in various games (Star Wars d20, Black Crusade), there's always someone to ask about whether there's a spa on board and how much it would cost to install one.

To date, the only exception I remember was an inquisitorial ship in Dark Heresy, because Inquisition.

Speaking of adventurers meeting in a bar, I once had a Planescape game that included a dryad stripper.

Well, they used to have a nymph stripper, but they went out of business fast.

One of my party's earlier adventures involved us entering a bewitched town, and my rogue (who's a bit of a Handsome Lech) dragged our fairly honorable elven ranger to a strip club. I managed to get him a private lap dance with a spaced out elven girl who ended up having had her memory erased and turned into a slave at the club as a result of the massive memory spell cast over the whole town. So we quickly had to somehow smuggle her out of the club and later kill the wizard that cast the spell to begin with.

But the way we look back at the whole ordeal was that only our ranger would turn a lap dance into a rescue mission.

edited 30th Jun '16 8:08:56 PM by HisInfernalMajesty

Actually, this was an epic level campaign, so I'm sure everyone woulda beat a Nymph's save DC fairly easily.

For me, its that one of my players is always a Chaotic Neutral emo bard (nobody lets him play Chaotic Evil.)

He wants to always play a bard that wants to kill everyone? .-. Why

It is a noted fact that my Dn D wild magic sorceress has a mother-fucking pimp cane that she stole from a boss using THE ALMIGHTY MAGIC HAND!

My L 5 R Spider Monk is absolutely incapable of performing any acrobatic feats. Things such as jumping over a small stream result in nothing but 1's. Yes, the character that has killed more than enough people with his bare hands, has suffered more damage from doing a cartwheel than by being hit by a sword.

@265: There was a bar/brothel in the 3.5 Dungeon Master's Guide 2 sample city called the Dancing Dryad. Said dryad was actually an elf under illusion spells, but the idea's sound.

The following exchange happens once per session of my current campaign:

"[character 1] looks at [character 2/object 1]. [character 1] looks at [character 3/object 2]. [character 1] looks at [character 2/object 1]. [character 1] looks at [character 3/object 2]."

[character 1]: "What."

In the campaign where I am a player and not the asshole DM, our party's ultra edgy Soul Reaper (player is cool; character is edgy) is forever mistaken as a drow, despite being very clearly a human. This is entirely my character's fault.

"X looks warm and inviting" has become the go to description for obviously evil places and obvious traps, ever since the party critfailed six open perception checks in a row to see if a distant cave looked safe and I used those words to describe the cave. When asking if something looks safe, the players now instead asks "does the sarcophagus look warm and inviting?" and similar questions.

Other in jokes include telling the Cleric he was more useful when the enemy wizard polymorphed him into a warhorse and everyone from the town actually living "on the outskirts" of the town, because everyone went with edgy characters and the twenty six of them were the towns entire remaining population.