Radar / Home Improvement

For a family sitcom, Home Improvement has quite a bit.

• Being a show where the characters frequently work with or reference various working tools, the writers naturally could not resist throwing in some Double Entendres about another type of "tool".
• This
  Tim: Today, we're going to install a storm door on an existing wood frame. You want to make sure this is done right because if your frame isn't hung well, then you've got a problem. Right, Al?
  Al: *adjusts his waistband* I wouldn't know, Tim.
• Plus, any time the word "ballcock" is mentioned...
• Also, when a woman on an episode of Tool Time fixes a toilet by physically adjusting a bar inside the tank, Tim says:
  Wow... Looks like that's not the only rod you've bent!
• There was even this:
  Tim: (Referring to filing wrenches) You gotta do that by size.
  Harry: (about Delores) She thinks size doesn't matter.
  Tim: Lucky for you.
• Jill: I can think of a real good place (to stick it).
• A lot of the times that Tim approaches Wilson, it's bound to be this (example:)
  Wilson: No, Tim, I'm ululating.
  Tim: Really, I didn't know men could do that.
  • See here
• Tim showing Jill a whirlpool bath, noting that the jet streams have three different streams: "low, medium, and 'who needs a man?'"
• This:
  Tim: I'm going to discuss two kinds of sanders. Your belt sander is perfect for the rough sanding. Your orbital, or vibrating, sander is smaller and perfect for putting in your pocket, right, Al?
  Al: I wouldn't know, Tim.
  Tim: I am kidding about that. Never, ever put electrical devices in your pants.
• "Beep beep, back the truck up."
• "Tim, that's not my screwdriver."
• This exchange in season one, as Tim tries to get the boys to help out around the house for their mom:
  Mark: I have a woman — Mommy.
  Randy: Your Mommy can't be your woman, you doofus.
  Tim: A lot of men pay their psychiatrists a lot of money to figure that one out.
• While babysitting Uncle Marty's two girls:
  Tim: I thought that was a children's book.
  Jill: The Secret Garden is a children's book. You had My Secret Garden. I don't even want you to read that book!
• Tim, bringing sick Jill a selection of "doctor"-themed movies: "Dr. No, Doctor Dolittle, Dr. Naughty and the Night Nurses... oops."
  • From the same episode, "Super Bowl Fever":
  Mark: Mom's really sick! She keeps moaning really loud and calling your name!
  Tim: Always my dream.
• The episode "The Naked Truth", when Tim accidentally sees his sister-in-law in the shower, is full of this.
• From the pilot:
  Jill: Tim, do you ever listen to me? It was the last thing that I said in bed to you last night.
  Tim: No, I believe, if you recall, the last thing you said to me in bed last night was "no!"
  Jill: You're thinking of tonight.
• From "Satellite on a Hot Tin Roof":
  Jill: Tim, what do you actually know about installing a satellite dish?
  Tim: It's simple. Mount it, point it straight up. Any man could do that.
  Jill: Yeah, but it has to stay up longer than ten seconds.
• After a night of making up...
  Mark: Brad and Randy told me what you were doing last night.
  Jill: ...they did?
  Mark: Yeah! Who won the somersault competition?
  Tim: ...your mom.
  Mark: Yay, mom!
  (Mark leaves)
  Tim: You did win, didn't you?
  Jill: Yeah. Twice.
• This exchange when Jill brings home a TV plug-in program that shows how different plastic surgeries would look on someone...
  (Mind you this is after Tim has been enlarging on-screen-Jill's breasts to the maximum setting)
  Jill: (To Tim, whose picture is on the TV) See you can make anything larger. A is for arms, C chest, W waist, and P pecs.
  Tim: Are you sure P stands for pecs?

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