In my sleeping bag I camped out overnight
Right in front of the store, then as soon as it was light out
I pressed my nose right up against the glass
You know, I had to be first in line
Gonna get me a flashlight and a broom
Want a pair of pliers for every single room of my house
See those hacksaws? Very, very soon
One of them will be all mine
Right in front of the store, then as soon as it was light out
I pressed my nose right up against the glass
You know, I had to be first in line
Gonna get me a flashlight and a broom
Want a pair of pliers for every single room of my house
See those hacksaws? Very, very soon
One of them will be all mine
—"Weird Al" Yankovic, "Hardware Store'
Kirito: So you're telling me, that there are people who log into this game, just to pretend to run an airport?
Leafa: Fairport.
Kirito: (Groaning) Don't.
Prince Cazmer: Princess Leafa! There you are! It's a good thing we caught you before you got through customs!
Kirito: (offscreen) They do that too?! Oh, I hate it!
Leafa: Fairport.
Kirito: (Groaning) Don't.
Prince Cazmer: Princess Leafa! There you are! It's a good thing we caught you before you got through customs!
Kirito: (offscreen) They do that too?! Oh, I hate it!
The world of scrapbooking and stamping is a terrifying place. Every time a woman presses a rubber stamp onto a sheet of embossed stationary, her vagina secretes one tablespoon of spackle... Dee is entrenched in a lifestyle I'll never understand, where gender stereotypes are things like 'every woman loves containers!' And speaking of every woman, after hearing the sounds that Dee makes every time she swipes her sponge across a postcard, I realize that every woman I've ever been with was faking orgasms. Dee Gruenig could power an aircraft carrier by sitting on a generator and looking at border patterns.
Asking friends to go to the game (most of them live less than 20 minutes away from the stadium, mind you) elicits the same response as if you asked them to go pick up a hooker on a Tuesday afternoon for lunch-a mixture of shock, disgust, disappointment but mostly bewilderment.
—Deadspin, "Why Your Team Sucks 2014: Miami Dolphins"
Happiness is a reward that must be earned. A commodity. The default state is misery, and you must strive to get out of it. This psychological abuse is codified in America's founding documents. 'The pursuit of happiness,' as though having a good time is some obscure thing that requires an elaborate quest...Our freedom from this rat race was video games. Which is what makes Where's Waldo? so galling. Widely recognized as one of the worst NES games ever, Where's Waldo consists of moving a cursor around some indistinct 8-bit graphics attempting to find Waldo...In other words, the game is a mind-wrenching exercise in abusive tedium ostensibly masquerading as 'fun.' Needless to say, of course, there was a sequel.
Beren: I thought you liked kingstone, sir.
Captain: Oh, as a diversion it's all right. But it isn't my preferred diversion, if others are to be had. Like watching ice form, for one.
[pause]
Beren: Oh. — That boring, huh?
Captain: Ice crystals are quite fascinating, the way they sheet over a pond.
Beren: Yeah, but you usually watch stuff like that when you're waiting for something to actually happen.
Captain: Oh, as a diversion it's all right. But it isn't my preferred diversion, if others are to be had. Like watching ice form, for one.
[pause]
Beren: Oh. — That boring, huh?
Captain: Ice crystals are quite fascinating, the way they sheet over a pond.
Beren: Yeah, but you usually watch stuff like that when you're waiting for something to actually happen.
Rick: So you're mining stuff to craft with and crafting stuff to mine with?
Morty: Uh-huh.
Rick: Did your dad write this game?
Morty: Mean.
Morty: Uh-huh.
Rick: Did your dad write this game?
Morty: Mean.
—Rick and Morty, "The Rickchurian Mortydate"
Fic Lynn: "Well? Isn't it dumb? All I can do is just get the ball whenever it goes out of bounds."
Nolan: "I like doing that. It's fun."
Lynn: "There is nobody in the history of sports who has ever had fun being the shag."
People may smile but I don't mind
They'll never understand the kind of fun I find
They'll never understand the kind of fun I find
—Bert, "Doin' the Pigeon"
Bart: I gotta find something else [for show-and-tell] quick!
Marge: Why don't you bring this potato? It's pretty big.
Bart: Mom, you're always trying to give me potatoes. What is it with you?
Marge: I just think they're neat.
—The Simpsons, "Sweet Seymour Skinner's Baadasssss Song"
Now who would buy a brick for a toy?
— Phineas Flynn, Phineas and Ferb, "Toy to the World"
"The People Mover is my favourite ride in the Magic Kingdom. I once rode it five times in a row. By myself. Because no one else wanted to ride it with me."
— Jenny Nicholson, Top 10 Lame Things to do at Disney World
Suits like myself have a very different idea of what you would call "fun". "Fun" is finding an extra staple in your stapler. "Fun" is getting a free pen when you sign up for a bank account.
— Derrick Man, Toontown: Corporate Clash
