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Chapel, A Drug Dealer.

And now, the latest exploits of America's third favorite drug dealer...
Narrator, "Inked."

Chapel is a monthly web series about a female Wisconsin drug dealer with terrible luck. Ashley Banks (no, not that one) gets out of prison, and becomes a drug dealer, going by the name "Chapel."

Not to be confused with Mr. Chapel, Chapel The Evergreen, or Chapel Smith. Although Word of God says she was named after Nurse Chapel.

This web series is produced by Chad Vader alum Rob Matsushita and Iver Pictures (formerly Claymore Pictures), and can be found here or on their official homepage. Emily Mills stars as the eponymous Chapel.

Chapel finished its first season in 2010, followed by a second.


This web series contains examples of:

  • Absurdly Sharp Blade: Chapel manages to decapitate Porter with a sword she bought...at Ren Faire.
  • Action Survivor: Arguably Chapel herself.
  • all lowercase letters: Almost all titles and credits are done in this style.
  • Anti-Hero: Chapel may be a Type III.
  • Arch-Enemy: Burke. Full stop.
  • Back Story: The pilot episode, "Audited."
  • Berserk Button: Lehaney from "Famed" was apparently in "that movie with the pie." No one gets to say more than that when reminding her of it.
  • Big Applesauce: The first season finale.
  • Big Bad: A few to choose from, but Burke, after surviving gunshot wounds to the eye and cheek, then sending a delusional psychopath Chapel's way seems to rise to the top. Or did, until Mr. Finley showed up during the second season.
  • Book Safe: A gun is hidden in an encyclopedia in "Complicated."
  • Bounty Hunter: Butch Sauft, the man who originally caught Chapel. But it wasn't personal.
    Butch: Sorry I caught you.
    Chapel: Sorry I ran.
  • Breast Attack: "You just SHOT ME IN THE BOOB!!!"
  • Bulletproof Vest: Chapel is offered one while gun-shopping in the second season. She buys it before the gun seller can even finish his pitch.
  • Camera Abuse: Invoked when Yvonne delivers a point-blank shotgun blast.
  • Chained to a Bed: At the beginning of "Guilted," Chapel wakes up to find herself in a wig and dress and tied to a bed. She's arguably more upset about the dress.
  • Character Title
  • Cool Shades: Part of Chapel's new look for the second season is a pair of vintage Ray-Ban's.
  • *Click* Hello: Benny is told by Burke that he was never Burke's partner, but a gift for her real partner. Enter Yvonne.
  • Convenient Misfire: At the end of "Complicated."
  • Country Matters: Benny's nickname for Yvonne in "Battered, Part One." He lives to regret it.
  • Create Your Own Villain: Not like they were exactly friends before, but Burke gets a whole lot worse when Chapel doesn't kill her quite thoroughly enough.
  • Criminal Procedural: Chapel herself falls into the Outsiders/Hangers On category.
  • Deliberately Monochrome: The pilot episode, "Audited," is shot mostly in black and white.
  • Didn't Want an Adventure: In Chapel's case, "I could have finished high school..."
  • Disproportionate Reward: In "Jacked, Part Two," mobster Capobianco tells Chapel that he owes her a favor for saving his life, even though Princess, his own daughter, did a lot more work. Lampshaded by Chapel, who points out that she "only shot the one guy," but Princess insists that Chapel take the favor anyway.
    Princess: Take it. It's kind of a big deal.
  • Double Tap: Burke nails a couple of cops at close range with a silenced .25 Colt in "Handcuffed."
  • Evil Laugh: Burke, but an honorable mention goes to Yvonne's crazed giggle in "Battered, Part Two."
  • Extended Disarming: A Mook searches Burke for weapons and finds a sword cane and several handguns. A final patdown causes several more small pistols to fall out from Burke's coat, causing the mook to say, "Jesus. I just started patting her down and she gave birth to a gun store."
  • Eye Scream: Burke takes a bullet to the eyeball in "Extremed."
  • Facial Horror: Burke, and we're finally shown the extent of the damage in "Neutralized." However, it's hinted that the mob can rebuild her...
  • Fantastic Drug: Lots. Chapel doesn't seem to deal in any kind of regular street drugs, but instead, bizarre experimental hallucinogens, like "Fourcolor," which makes the world seem like a comic book, or "Dimestore," which reverses the effects of pain.
  • The Farmer and the Viper: Chapel manages to save Yvonne's life, but it doesn't matter—Yvonne still wants revenge.
    Chapel: Are we cool?
    Yvonne: Is my brother still dead? (Beat.) Then I guess we're not cool.
  • First-Person Smartass
  • Formula-Breaking Episode: The episode "Inked" is done in motion comic format.
  • Freeze-Frame Bonus: Going frame-by-frame through the shot of the "Won't It Rule" webpage has a few extra jokes, including a Shout-Out to the creators of Chad Vader.
  • Girls with Guns: Um, yeah.
  • Groin Attack: Female-on-female example, when Chapel kicks Stone in the groin in the episode "Handcuffed."
  • Guns Do Not Work That Way: In "Extremed," when Burke literally has to bite a bullet: "What if it goes off in my mouth?" "That's impossible! You know how unlucky you would have to be?"
  • How We Got Here: Used in "Complicated," "Battered, Part One," and "Handcuffed."
  • If You Kill Him, You Will Be Just Like Him!: In "Matched," Chapel gets the drop on Burke, who tells her, "Chapel, if you kill me, you will be just like me."
    Chapel: "No, I'll be just as bad as you. There's a difference."
  • IKEA Weaponry: Burke assembles one of these in the season one finale. It's the exact same gun used in the movie In the Line of Fire. However, it falls apart (being made of plastic and all) when she tries to use it on Chapel.
  • Important Haircut: In "Audited," after being grabbed by her hair several times during fights, Chapel gets her hair cut very short. It's more practical than symbolic.
  • It Gets Easier: Chapel says this almost exactly in "Famed."
    Chapel: "I've killed people, you know. Doing this. And the scariest fucking thing about it to me is that every single time it gets a little bit easier to live with. But I would kill twice as many people just to have your problems instead of mine..."
  • It's What I Do: Butch responds with this exact phrase when Chapel asks why his research on her was...oddly specific.
  • Legion of Doom: Pretty much the story of "Inked."
  • Let's You and Him Fight: Burke and Benny's gambit during "Guilted."
  • Kick the Dog: In "Famed," when former movie star Lehaney realizes that she's dying, she begs Chapel for help. Chapel's response? She watches Lehaney bleed out, then takes pictures of her dead body to sell to the press.
  • Mortal Wound Reveal: The knife sticking out of Lehaney's chest in "Famed."
  • Never Found the Body: In "Famed:"
    Chapel: Whoop-dee-hell, you saw four dead bodies. Doesn't make you Zoe Bell.
    Lehaney: Don't exaggerate. There weren't four dead bodies.
    Chapel: ...What?
  • Noodle Incident: We never do find out why Burke needed a bullet wound in "Extremed." When asked directly in a flashback, she simply says, "That's not important."
  • Not Herself: In "Guilted," a flashback (told from another character's point of view) shows Chapel behaving very strangely indeed, even commenting that she has to go to a party, because she has "handsome men to impress." Hearing this, Chapel even lampshades it. Later, we find out that the person telling the story was given faulty information, and that the drug dealer in the story isn't Chapel at all, but Burke.
  • On the Next: Done as motion typography using just dialogue from the next episode, along with the title.
  • Pregnant Hostage: Who'd have thought it'd be Burke?
  • Previously on…: Even the pilot had one when it was first uploaded, but this was cut when new viewers who hadn't seen the original shorts found it to be filled with spoilers.
  • Private Eye Monologue
  • Put on a Bus: Labyrinth decides to leave town to see her and Chapel's mother. Labyrinth even goes so far as to say "put me on a bus, I'm outta here!"
  • Real Life Writes the Plot: Burke's pregnancy was a result of her actress, Kelly Maxwell, being eight months pregnant during the shooting of the episode.
  • Red Right Hand: Burke has a creepy half-mask that she sometimes puts makeup on.
  • Revolvers Are Just Better: When buying a gun in "Loaded," Chapel picks a customized Smith & Wesson .44 magnum, naming this trope for the reason.
  • Reports of My Death Were Greatly Exaggerated: Chapel says to her mother, " Dad said you were dead."
    Christine Church: "Yeah, well, your father's a douchebag."
  • Scary Shiny Glasses: Grocer's aviators in "Karated." Chapel's own Ray-Ban's are also a variant.
  • Shotguns Are Just Better: Yvonne seems to prefer using one in more than one episode.
  • Shout-Out: So many that they got their own movie, which is also a Shout-Out.
  • Shur Fine Guns: Will seems to be carrying at least one of these (if not two) in "Extremed."
  • Sibling Yin-Yang: Crazy theater girl Labyrinth is revealed to be Chapel's little sister.
  • Stylistic Suck: Lehaney reading from a movie script in "Famed." It's basically the same opening monologue from "Complicated," with a few cheesy lines thrown in.
  • Sword Cane: Burke alludes to having one in season one and finally uses it in season two.
  • Tag-Along Actor: The premise of the episode "Famed:" Lehaney, a once-famous actress, follows Chapel around to research for a possible upcoming role as a drug dealer in a gritty crime drama.
  • Terrible Trio: Burke, Stone, and Yvonne team up to kill Chapel in "Inked." Burke seems to be the brains, Yvonne the beauty, and Stone the muscle, but these roles are a bit subjective.
  • The Stinger: Almost every episode has one.
  • Theme Music Power-Up: When Chapel returns to save Yvonne in "Battered, Part Two."
    "Forgot my purse."
  • There Is No Kill Like Overkill: Ronny's death in "Famed."
  • Time Skip: Between Season One and Two.
  • Trigger-Happy: At first, Burke seems to not like guns at all, but after getting shot through the eye, she develops a pretty major gun fetish.
  • Unknown Rival: Chapel isn't even aware that Burke is still alive until the episode "Inked."
  • Verbed Title: Every episode.
  • Waking Up Elsewhere: When Chapel has to get out of town at the end of "Inked," Butch Sauft punches her out. She wakes up to see the Statue Of Liberty. Right next to her.
  • We Meet Again: Subverted. A female Mook says this to Princess. Princess blows the mook's brains out before she can say anything else, however.
  • We Will Meet Again: Burke says this a lot.
  • Why Won't You Die?: Yvonne says this to Chapel in "Inked." Also counts as a Punctuated! For! Emphasis!.
    Chapel: "Offhand, I'd say it's because YOU SUCK AT KILLING ME!!!"
  • Worthy Opponent: Burke says this to Chapel in "Matched."

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