Recap / Film Reroll: Jurassic Park

Hey, you got to Attack Its Weak Point, right? ^note  Art by Scherazade

Andy talks to himself! Pitr falls in a river! Scott bribes a helicopter pilot! Jonathan slaps a child! Joz threatens Samuel L Jackson with scissors! Welcome to Jurassic Park!!!

Episodes 43-45 of Film Reroll. Based on the 1993 movie.

When paleontologists Allan Grant and Ellie Sattler found themselves on a helicopter heading for a faraway island, they didn't know quite what to expect. What they certainly weren't expecting was to end up in a theme park full of living dinosaurs. Nor did they expect said dinosaurs to break out of their cages and run amok on the island. Now they must join the unlikely team of mathematician Ian Malcolm, attorney Donald Gennaro, game warden Robert Muldoon and park founder Hammond's grandchildren Tim and Lex Murphy to fight and fly for their lives if they want to have a chance of getting back to the mainland in one piece.

Starring Jonathan West (First Appearance) and Timothy "Tim" E. Nolan as Alan Grant, ^note  Jonathan's schedule didn't allow him to as stay for the enire campaign, so Tim fills in for him towards the end of the last episode. Jocelyn "Joz" Vammer as Ellie Sattler, Scott Aiello as Ian Malcolm, Kara Strait^note  credited as “Pitr Strait” as Donald Gennaro and Robert Muldoon, Andy Hoover as Tim and Lex Murphy, and Paulo Quiros as the Dungeon Master.

Followed by Friday the 13th: the Final Chapter.

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Tropes:

• Achilles' Heel: Referenced by Ellie, who — as shown in the page image — asks if the dinosaurs have Achilles Tendons.
• Adaptational Context Change:
  • Because Dr. Grant opted to instead smack the kid at the archeology site, his speech about how raptors hunt is instead delivered to Ian Malcolm while the group heads to the raptor paddock in Jurassic Park.
  • As Muldoon lives in this campaign, the line "clever girl" is now directed at Lex.
  • While Arnold still loses his arm to a velociraptor offscreen, that fight now went down in the visitors' center and left him bleeding out in the command center.
• Adaptational Species Change: The animal which is fed to the Velociraptors is no longer a cow, but rather a goat (which was only fed to the T-Rex in the film.) This is lampshaded.
• Adaptational Villainy:
  • Alan Grant actually hits the kid who said that the Raptor looked like a giant turkey, which derails into a fistfight with the boy's father. Later, he threatens to do something even worse to John Hammond after the latter lands his helicoper on the paleontologists' dig site, breaks into one of their trailers, and proceeds to loot their fridge. Eventually, he's willing to sacrifice Gennaro's life to the Raptors in order to save his own skin. Lampshaded by the players, who point out what a Designated Hero he is.
    Andy: Allan brilliantly intuits immediately what all the dinosaurs are going to do, tells everybody to do stuff, throws an axe against the wall, forces the lawyer out the door, and then ineffectually grabs-
    Jonathan: (talks over Andy) He grabs [Muldoon's] sack.
    Kara: And he sexually harasses-
    Joz: (with Kara) And fondles Muldoon...
    Andy: This man is our leader.
    Scott: We have established this man is a sociopath from the go, okay?
  • A mild example, but it turns out that Tim and Lex's father has been cheating on his taxes.
• Adult Hater: As a result of Ian Malcolm almost getting everyone killed driving under the T.rex, Paulo decides that, as a quirk, Lex Murphy grows to hate him, something Andy is happy to abide by:
  Lex: Fuck you, Dr. Malcolm!
• Ambiguous Robots: The players joke that Tim Murphy might be a robot.
• Beware of the Nice Ones: Ellie forces Ray Arnold to help her find Tim and Lex by threatening him with a pair of scissors.
• Call-Back: Kara choosing to give Gennaro a queasy tone of voice during the initial demonstration of Jurassic Park's inner workings causes Paulo to ask if he's become Drunk Alan Parrish.
• The Cloud Cuckoolander Was Right: Muldoon clearly starts losing it when he chases after the Gallimimuses - at one point even saying that he wants to join the herd - but running along with it actually turns out to be a good strategy to not get trampled.
• Convenient Replacement Character: A variation. After Donald Gennaro flees into the forest - away from the rest of the gang - Kara starts playing Robert Muldoon instead.
• Crazy Enough to Work: The players manage to scare away dinosaurs multiple times by ranting at them.
• Crazy-Prepared: Discussed: After Jonathan decides to have Dr. Grant use Muay Thai, everyone else silently turns their attention to Paulo, forcing him to admit that no, Dr. Grant doesn't know Muay Thai.
• Death by Adaptation:
  • In the prologue, the Raptor kills a different guard than it did in the film.
  • Played With concerning Ian Malcolm, who died in the book, was Spared by the Adaptation in the movie, and then Retconned as having survived in the book's sequel. Here, he survives but loses a leg, and later dies two years later due to becoming The Alcoholic.
• The Determinator: Deconstructed a bit with Ellie. She doesn't ask for medical aid after being injured during the helicopter trip, because she doesn't want anyone to think that she is weak. This comes back to bite her later, as it makes the already tough challenges she faces later on even tougher for her.
• Delicious Distraction: Ellie Sattler tries this on the Triceratops. It works... for a while.
• Dies Differently in Adaptation:
  • Thanks to passing out from a failed Fright check, Donald Gennaro avoids his movie fate of dying on the toilet, and in fact manages to live until the final episode of the campaign... when another failed Fright check leads to him bolting out of the Visitors Centre and directly into the claws of a third velociraptor (just as Dr. Grant had planned).
  • Ray Arnold still loses an arm to a velociraptor, but managed to retreat to the command center before dying and eventually perishes during attempted medical treatment.
• The Dividual: Siblings Tim and Lex Murphy, both of whom are played by Andy Hoover and have pretty much the exact same personality. Kara theorizes that they might share a Hive Mind.
• 11th-Hour Ranger: Dr. Wu becomes part of the campaign / Andy's third character during the final stretch, when Muldoon needs someone to accompany him to help reset the island's computer systems, and there's no one else to go with him^note Ellie is still banged up, Ian is near death, and Grant needs to stay behind to watch after them.
• Establishing Character Moment:
  • When the archeology crew manages to get video of the raptor skeleton, and one of them states this technology could remove the need for digging entirely in a few years' time, Dr. Grant just coldly says "Shut up."
    • And in case you thought that was a one-off fluke: The literal moment the kid makes the giant turkey comment, how does Dr. Grant respond?
    Jonathan: I'd like to smack [the kid], can I roll for it?
• Faint in Shock:
  • When the T-Rex first appears and everyone rolls Fright checks, several characters faint from the shock. Since the T-Rex's vision is based on movement, this massively increases their odds of survival, with Kara in particular being delighted at Gennaro's continued failure to wake up.
  • Gennaro faints, a bit preemptively, when the main gate opens and he expects to meet a T-Rex. In actuality, it's just the rest of the group coming back. Muldoon ends up taking care of the unconscious lawyer.
• Flat Character: invoked Parodied: After Tim fucks up his knock-knock joke at the Desalination Plant, Muldoon declares he will not be having a character arc in this movie:
  Muldoon: Alright, that's the first and last time I engage a child in conversation. You know, I thought I'd try a little bit of a character arc, Tim kinda fucked it, uhhhh... I'm stayin' the same.
• Flipping Helpless: The car used by our protagonists is rendered quite useless once the Triceratops flips it over.
• Flipping the Bird: As the group passes the baryonyx helplessly sinking in the swamp, Malcolm spitefully does this to the dinosaur... which Lex proceeds to do to him out of anger.
• Foil: By the end of the campaign, Dr. Grant becomes this to Ian Malcolm: In stark contrast to Malcolm's driving stunt past the T-Rex, protecting Ellie against the swarm of Gallimimuses, impaling a raptor with a pipe, and surviving a lethal slash to the chest, Dr. Grant haphazardly throws away his weapon, sacrifices Genarro, and accidentally grabs Muldoon's balls while trying to take his knife.
• Friend to All Children: Surprisingly enough, Donald Gennaro. It turns out that he identifies with them because he acts like a rude, ill-mannered child himself.
• Genre Savvy: After Jonathan decides to have Dr. Grant bust out some Muay Thai in his fight with Harold, there's a moment of silence before Paulo announces that no, he didn't give Dr. Grant that ability. Paulo then confirms that the silence was because everyone turned to look at him after Jonathan announced it.
• Groin Attack: Robert Muldoon takes three damage after being bitten in the crotch by a Proceratosaurus.
• I Coulda Been a Contender!: Muldoon admits that he never really wanted to fight dinosaurs, and sadly had to give up his dream of becoming an artist.
  Muldoon: (while waving his rifle around) Get out! Go on! There's nothing for ya here! Go on!
  Paulo: ...okay.
  Muldoon: You're not wanted! I never wanted this in the first place! I wanted to be a painter! It's on my sheet! (getting increasingly frantic) It's not good, I never went to art school, I had to learn how to handle guns! My father said that it was guns, not paint brushes, but it's there! It's a nine! "Artist (painting): 9"! It could've been a TWELVE! At least! But I'm here! And it's 'cause of you! I didn't want this! I didn't want this- I DON'T WANT YOU, DAD! I DON'T WANT YOU DAD!
• I'm Standing Right Here: Inverted: When Joz describes in detail Ellie's determination to fight the Proceratosauruses despite being severely injured, she winds up putting the other players on edge because, due to pointing at Kara for a portion of it, they thought she was calling out her instead of the dinosaurs:
  Joz: [H]ere's the thing: Watching the movie, Ellie always activates when somebody... challenges her femininity. And you just attacked the guy I care about, and you attacked somebody else that I love, so I'm gonna go in, and I'm gonna attack the dinosaurs...
  Scott: (nervous) So, just wanna make sure, I'm understanding that the dinosaurs-
  Kara: (talking over Scott) You're making- When you mean "you", you mean the dinosaur.
  Joz: Yeah!
  Scott: (talking over Joz) The d- So, the dinosaurs attacked your femininity...
  Kara: (talking over Scott) Okay. I'm not the dinosaur.
  Joz: (now realizing) Not you, not you.
  Kara: You pointed directly... I was like, "Did I...?"
• In Spite of a Nail: Despite the changes to the plot, Arnold still gets his arm ripped off by raptors (and later dies of the injury.)
• Kick the Dog: Gennaro meets his end in this campaign when the adults are fighting the Velociraptors at the Visitors Centre... when Dr. Grant decides to sacrifice him to the third raptor by tricking him into running off towards it.
• Last Stand: Our heroes believe that they've found themselves in one once the Desalination Plant is attacked by Proceratosauruses. None of them actually die, however.
• Locked Out of the Loop: Attempted: After Grant and Muldoon notice the swarm of Proceratosauruses heading to the Desalination Plant, the two run into Ian when they head back inside... and Muldoon (for no good reason) decides to try and keep him in the dark:
  Muldoon: (quietly) Grant, Grant, Grant. We tell 'em nothing.
• Long Runner: Variation: Due to some difficulties getting everyone back together, a full year passed between the recording of Parts 1 and 2.
• Mondegreen: Paulo telling Joz "Give him a good ol' shove." briefly causes a moment of tension due to Joz mishearing that as "girl shove".
• Never My Fault:
  • Dr. Grant refuses to take responsibility for slapping the kid. Not only is his immediate reaction to Ellie trying to de-escalate things between him and the kid's father to dismissively ask why there's a large group of people at their dig site, but when the father sarcastically apologizes for the fact his son made a comment, Dr. Grant accepts his "apology". Even when the father starts to fight him, he doesn't acknowledge he was in the wrong.
  • Not only that, but when Ellie assumes Dr. Grant did that because of something she did, he point-blank accuses her of "internalizing things", which is an old argument of theirs, apparently.
• Nice Job Breaking It, Hero / Point of Divergence: Ellie gets her ankle twisted directly because Malcolm decided to bribe the helicopter pilot into making the ride as rough as possible.
• Papa Wolf: The second Dr. Grant slaps "Turkey Kid", Scott asks (and Paulo obliges) to take over the kid's father, Harold. He then proceeds shove Dr. Grant in response to the slap. This in turn devolves into a full-on fight scene.
  Harold: YOU JUST HIT MY SON, WHAT THE FUCK, MAN?!
• Quicksand Sucks: The whole group get stuck in quicksand at one point. Muldoon nearly sinks to the bottom, but is saved by Ellie at the last moment. The poor Baryonyx which also ended up there isn't as lucky...
• Robotic Spouse: Harold, the father of the "Turkey Kid," is apparently married to the Lost in Space robot.
• Shaming the Mob: Indirectly: While yelling at the Proceratosauruses to scare them off, Muldoon starts to rant about how he wanted to be a painter instead of a hunter, and how his dad forced him into this life. Paulo then announces the "raw emotion" of this takes the dinosaurs aback.
• Shout-Out:
  • When Ellie worries about the fact that the park contains carnivorous plants, she is assured that "Nothing is happening." There is however an Audrey II in the facility...
  • Kara quotes the "That's not a knife" scene from "Crocodile" Dundee constantly to ground her Australian accent for Muldoon.
• Spared by the Adaptation: Robert Muldoon knows what a dangerous situation he's found himself in (there's even a place on the map spookily named "Muldoon's death,") but he lives to the end.
• Tranquil Fury: Parodied: Joz deciding that Ellie was also going to fight Harold is predicated with her casually saying "I'm mad."
• Truer to the Text:
  • Donald Gennaro is now closer to his book counterpart, being a more competent badass who still dies eventually, but not without putting up a bit of a fight.
  • After the movie version of Dr. Wu was first Demoted to Extra and then had a bit of a Face–Heel Turn, his Reroll counterpart gets back his original characterisation as a Reluctant Mad Scientist willing to risk his life to clean up the mess caused by his experimenting. He even gets to turn the power in the park back on and lives to tell the tale.
• Try and Follow: Muldoon and Dr. Wu manage to outrun the T-Rex by going offroad driving into the forest.
• Twisted Ankle: Ellie gets one during the (deliberately) uncomfortable helicopter ride to the island.
• Uncertain Doom: At some point during the night, John Hammond went out with another search party. The campaign ends with him still missing, presumed dead by the few who care.
• Unusually Uninteresting Sight:
  • During the fight between Dr. Grant and Harold, Paulo has everyone roll for Perception. Andy is the only one to succeed, leading Paulo to casually announce that "Turkey Kid" was the only one to notice the approaching helicopter... before promptly resuming DMing the fight.
  • Donald Gennaro is the only one who doesn't seem to be the least bit impressed by the dinosaurs and only discusses the park in dry, legal terms, to the point of being The Comically Serious.
• Urban Legend of Zelda: invoked Discussed: After Andy mentions a rumor that "Turkey Kid" was played by Jake Gyllenhaal, not only does Joz bluntly say that can't be true, Kara points out that there are credits to the movie. Andy also mentions the one about Marilyn Manson supposedly being in The Wonder Years.
• What Happened to the Mouse?: It's mentioned that Hammond left the Visitors Centre with a search team, but we never find out what happened to them or if they even survived.
• You Have GOT to Be Kidding Me!: When Jonathan causes a full on brawl to break out between Harold and Dr. Grant, the moment Ellie gets fed up and decides to take part, Kara screams "THIS MOVIE HAS DINOSAURS IN IT!"
• You Shall Not Pass!: The group arrives at a bridge "guarded" by a worried Gallimimus. Muldoon manages to scare it away with a Flirtatious Smack on the Ass, but this also gets the attention of the rest of the herd, which chase it over the bridge, injuring Malcolm and Ellie in the process.
• Zerg Rush: The Proceratosauruses operate like this during the Desalination Plant fight. Sure, they are rather easy to take down, but there are a lot of them.

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