Bob: Hmmm, there's a lesson in all this.
Eglamore: Okay, let's hear it.
Bob: Never let sixty angry kids use a herd of Laser Cows to take over your house.
Every story has a moral. For example, the moral of World War One is 'never assassinate Archduke Ferdinand.'
As Superman went on and on and on about it, it became clear that there was no allegory or metaphor. The lesson being taught to children here really was that you should never shrink anyone. And more importantly, you should never get a job writing cartoons when your main hobbies are recreational drugs and head injuries.
"Well, Mario, did we learn some kind of horribly unlikely to occur lesson today?"
—Luigi, Mario Adventures
Princess Bubblegum: I hope you grasp the full consequences of breaking promises.
Finn: HECK YEAH! If I break a royal promise, I get to fight zombies, throw slumber parties, awake gumball guardians, and—and—
Princess Bubblegum: Alright, alright!
Finn: —AND REVERSE DEATH ITSELF.
"Remember, kids, if you work hard and never let go of your dream, one day your rich idiot friend will just shove lots of money into your hands."
Slade: The moral of this story? Never make a deal with an inter-dimensional demon without a little protection.
Jason: Having to go first all the time only leads to trouble! Like getting burned up by the sun! Now, the consequences are not always so extreme, but good things come to those who wait.
I think I learned a valuable lesson. Always take down your Christmas decorations after New Year's or you get filleted by a hooker from God.
"Premarital sex turns straight people gay and gays into Mexicans. We all go down a notch!"
"...and, if you have sex, you're automatically in Al Qaeda."
—Peter Griffin and Jerry Kirkwood, Family Guy, "Prick Up Your Ears"
"Hmmm. You know, maybe there's an environmental message to all this: Don't sell your land to mining companies. Or else the Slender Man will get you."