The TV Series: Season 1Episode 1: Pilot
- Liv walks in on some cops mocking Clive by singing Lady Gaga's "Bad Romance" (after Clive told them that a murder victim identified herself using Gaga's real name): She has this to say about it:
Liv: I think those guys want your bad romance. Unless singing Gaga around the station is a cop thing.
- Also, the scene where Johnny Frost says she needs more of a tan (which is now impossible for her to obtain after becoming a zombie) she immediately responses by quoting what he says during one of his sessions with a dead call girl. The little enraged head tilt she does before that is both hilarious and adorable. The rest of her facial reactions, especially when Clive gives her a "I can't believe you're right" look also count.
- Clive when he finds Liv and Ravi watching a movie.
Clive: Zombies! I would be a dangerous man after the zombies came—I wouldn't be making any rookie mistakes. Is that a scratch on my grandmother? [points to Ravi] BAM! Hasta la vista, Mee-Maw.
Liv: [somewhat horrified] Chivalry is dead.
Clive: But Clive is alive.
- Liv receiving heart surgery from Ravi, yeah, that scene.
- Liv goes into work and Blaine is sitting there waiting for her. The scene starts out so ominously and then they start casually comparing and complaining about their experiences whilst being zombies.
Blaine: ...and yeah, before I knew it, sirens were blaring and I'm still about to crack this guy's head open for the tiniest taste of brain, which is...the single most disgusting thing a person can eat.Liv: That it is.Blaine: It's the consistency that kills me.Liv: I can't get around it. And there's that weird metallic taste?Blaine: Is that what it is? I used to be a serious wine guy and now everything I drink tastes like iodine.Liv: I saw a kid eating a peanut butter cup last week and I almost cried. I miss food so much.
- At one point in the episode, Major is asked by Liv why she was (supposedly) such a jerk. His response is gold.
Major: I don't know; it was one of the things I just put up with because you're super hot. I'm kidding... [mumbles] to a degree.
- The entire opening banter scene between Liv and Ravi, with multiple parts of hilarity; an incredibly cute conversation between a couple of Adorkable Deadpanned Snarkers.
- Liv: If you heard the aimless shambling of the undead, that might have just been me.
- Liv's newfound brain induced paranoia as the impetus for Ravi and Major becoming roommates who are VERY excited about playing Diablo III together.
- Liv sees Ravi go into the porn section of a Chinese video store and offers her opinion:
Liv: Your need for privacy in your living arrangement has just come into much sharper focus.
- Major gets his ass handed to him by the zombie who ate Jerome and the tone of the scene is overall depressing until:
Passing Skater: (to Major) Get up, bitch.
- Ravi teases Liv endlessly about her crush on Lowell, until she stops him with this remark:
Liv: Shut up or I'll eat you.
- Liv thinking that Lowell's accent comes from Buckingham Regalshire. He corrects her to London.
- Liv trying to make a lame excuse for why she has to cancel her date, before remembering Lowell is also a zombie and she can just tell the truth.
- Liv, Ravi, and Clive listen to a recording of the victim of the week ranting at some poor customer service rep, saying, "I am the Sim Reaper, Shanie. I am the keeper of the web. CEOs of Fortune 500 companies tremble before me! I am invisible, intangible, untouchable! I am the bringer of cyber-darkness! Fail me, and I will delete you like so much digital noise!" And Liv laments, "Why are all the good ones unavailable?"
- Ravi and Lowell having a rapid-fire, extremely British conversation discussing the specific origins of their accents and trash-talking various local sports teams. Liv responds with this gem:
Liv: Why do I have the sudden urge to dump tea into a harbor?
Lowell: What's she talking about?
Ravi: Colonist propaganda. Pay her no mind.
- Liv thinking Lowell is suddenly no longer interested in her, only to later find out that he ate a gay guy's brains so he'll be back to normal once the effects wear off.
Lowell: I didnít really get it until I saw a magazine with Idris Elba on the cover, and the phrase Ďbig piece of yumí popped into my head. Iím mildly afraid of heights, but I would not hesitate to climb that mountain.
- Sebastian's choice of exclamation after Liv headbutts him is pretty funny (and quite dark, given the circumstances)
Sebastian: Ow, Mother of Dragons! God, that hurt!
- Shortly after eating the brains of someone with schizophrenia, Liv winds up having the devil talk to her (in the form of a bag of "Hellfire Cheezy Puffs" with a devil mascot):
Ravi: I am concerned...but I'm also craving salt before sweet. [gestures to the bag] Do you think he'd mind?
Devil: Eat me!
Liv: He seems okay with it.
- Liv mixes the cheerleader's brains into hot chocolate.
- Major and Blaine in the freezer.
Major: Why are you doing this?
Blaine: Daddy issues? Megalomania? Greed? Wow, it felt really good to get that off my chest.Blaine: You know what my mother used to say?
Major: "Oh god, why didn't I use birth control?"
Season 2Episode 1: Grumpy Old Liv
- On rat names and Star Wars:
Ravi: Her name is New Hope, not Final Hope. You know this. If I wanted to give her a depressing name, I'd have gone with Phantom Menace.
- Ravi is annoyed that Major can't get him drugs.
Major: Yeah, because everything about me looks like I can score drugs.
Ravi: You bought a grenade out of a trunk of a car! How can you not figure out how to buy drugs at a nightclub?
Major: It's a different skillset! If you want a bazooka, I can get you a bazooka in fifteen minutes. At cost.
- Ravi is offended that the drug dealer doesn't think he might be an undercover cop.
- An exasperated Major is watching Ravi trying to record his observations of being high off of Utopium... before Major decides to join in.
- And then Ravi listening to his observations, which are... not helpful.
Ravi: Major! You know what we need for the house? Velvet! Major! Major! Major?!
- And then Ravi listening to his observations, which are... not helpful.
- Liv on frat boy brains is hilarious and she can't hold back her urges to do incredibly stupid things like:
- Arranging two skeletons in the morgue against each other to make it so one is laying across the other's lap and the latter is spanking the former.
- Putting makeup all over a sleeping Ravi complete with blush, lipstick, blue eyeshadow, and beard glitter (that Ravi can't get off) all topped off with FART written across his forehead.
- A somber moment of Liv (who is still on frat boy brains) comforting Major (who is high off of Utopium) results in this:
Major: I won't let anything happen to you.Liv: ...And I won't shave off your eyebrow.
- A couple comes in to get questioned together and Babineaux asks them what they were doing with a giant costume of an anthropomorphic animal at home. Turns out, nothing to do with the case, the girl just confesses that she's a furry.
- Blaine's new zombie enforcer is a dim-witted mute named Chief. When they go to collect a drug-dealer turned preacher, he asks (through his phone) if Jesus was a zombie.
- Liv refuses sex with Major in case it turns him into a zombie, and checks on him in the morning to make sure.
Liv: We got lucky.
Major: ...not the way I remember it.
- Pure Black Comedy, but the Max Rager employees watching a restrained mindless zombie trying to grab a bowl of brains just out of reach.
Gilda: It's like watching my mom try to refold a map. The cane is right there!
- Ravi and Blaine fighting over the anti-zombie serum... set to "Friday, I'm In Love" by The Cure. Yes, really. They wrestle all over the lab, over and under the tables, until Ravi smashes it with a glass of something.
- Major breaks up a kiddy-fight at the basketball practice Liv tricks him into coaching.
Major: Hey hey hey! Break it up! Is that the kind of team this is? The kind of team Coach Hayden would want you to be?
Kid: Wow. You went there.
Major: I'm shameless.
- For anyone who lives in Washington State, Ravi's reaction to their field trip to Tacoma is hilarious.
- Bozzio spots Clive being given a grilling by Da Chief. And reacts by doing various sight gags behind her back, while making eye contact with him. Clive is left trying to explain to his boss why he can't keep a straight face.
- Ravi and Peyton find out about the renewed Liv/Major romance when Major comes down in the morning practically singing.
Ravi: It won't always be this nauseating, right?
Major: Suffer, bitch.
- Continuing the above, Liv hums cheerily while doing an autopsy, which freaks out Ravi.
- Liv and Ravi think Clive is a hero for standing next to one of their asshole former perps who got shot.
Clive: There's nothing heroic about not getting shot.
Ravi: Did you soil yourself?
Ravi: Then it's heroic in my book.
- Angus tries to give a lesson to Blaine.
Angus: What do you know about the Titans?Blaine: Perennial AFC South underachievers.Angus: The money I could have saved on boarding schools...
- Liv on a magician's brain. All of it.
Ravi: This is the best brain ever. I almost want to start killing magicians so it never ends.
- Clive, on the other hand, knows how to deal with it.
Liv: Pick a card!
- The magician had a fascination with death, leading to this gem from Liv. Blaine's expression really sells it.
Liv: Love is only a delay of death. Tragedy waiting in the wings.Blaine: [long look] You're bumming me out, man.
- "I'm an acquired taste. Like gazpacho or that free U2 album."
- "Help me, Zombie-Wan Kenobi, you're our only hope."
- Ravi learns Clive is A Song of Ice and Fire fan, and how to get under his skin.
- One of the comic-style scene transition cards reads: "I'm Only Happy When It's Brains"
- Pam believing that she shouldn't be in jail because they arrested her for marijuana possession and she's been arrested for that before, which makes it double jeopardy.
- The Victim of the Week is a shop teacher and amateur crimefighter operating under the superhero name The Fog. When Liv balks at climbing into the dumpster his body was found in, Ravi suggests an alternative.
Ravi: What do you want me to do? Lay out the body bag and wait for The Fog to roll in?
- To follow up, Liv expresses disapproval of The Fog's hobby while making a sub sandwich out of his brains.
Ravi: May I remind you that you don't know what you're going to get from this meal? If the shop teacher predominates, I may be getting a custom spice rack. [glances at sandwich] But personally, I think you've got the makings of a hero.
- Liv's hysterical superhero one-liners:
I make time for justice.So all this Santa delivers to our city... is crime.
- Related to the second one: a scene transition card reads "Santa Claus is Running the Town" when Stacey Boss shows up.
- Blaine's horribly awkward way of introducing a new zombie to his condition now that he's out of practice. Immediately afterwards, he realizes he should have led with the fact that zombies exist.
- Clive thrown by how Liv and Ravi are totally okay with the piercing of a corpse and they discuss all the things they've pulled out of bodies. They also say they expected it from the guy's sex tape and laugh on how Clive is "so innocent," not knowing about it.
- Liv on the acting brains and emoting on the "acting essence" of playing against zombies.
Liv: I would draw on the fear of being in the woods and seeing a bear.Ravi: Or, seeing an actual zombie.
- The inevitable joke when a pair of zombie actors on set complain about their work.
Extra: You know what would be good? A zombie show where the zombie is the main character.Clive: That sounds dumb.
Ravi: I don't get why they shoot in Seattle when the show is set in Portland.Liv: Tax breaks. explanation
- Liv practices lines with an actor, and the script reveals that he will be the new star of the show after the last one was murdered. When Clive comments that he knows who's going to be on the front of the next season's poster, Liv says "Thanks, but I'm happy in my current job". Also Liv's unscripted slapping of said actor during the rehearsal because "it just felt honest".
- Liv's random sexy Imagine Spots.
- Liv mentions that Clive really fills out his shirts, and both Major and Ravi immediately agree.
- Blaine's wonderful Oh, Crap! reaction when he realizes Liv and Peyton know each other and Peyton is in on the zombie thing.
Liv: Stop trying to make Team Z a thing.Peyton: Blaine was just telling me we could have something special.Liv: Aw, he swiped right.
- Liv, on the brains of a social network nut, creates a vlog of... unboxing morgue supplies. It's not particularly popular, but it's far more popular than Ravi can understand.
- Liv noting a hung-over Ravi. "You're a disgrace to your country's long history of functional lushes."
- Clive finally admits that he notices Liv's personality changes, but assumes it's just part of her process. When he talks to Ravi about it, Ravi pretends he has no idea what he's talking about.
- Blaine reuniting with his father's maid, Frieda
Frieda: Still an insolent boy.Blaine: I blame my upbringing. I wasn't beaten enough as a child.Frieda: It remains my greatest regret.Blaine: Really? So you're over losing out to Eva Braun, huh?
- A bit of Black Comedy, when Blaine is threatening Major:
Blaine: I know where you live. I know where Liv, um, lives.
- Blaine retrieves his father through a deal with Major and thaws him, but he's done up makeup to make himself look older, and tells him it's been fifty years, that he missed the zombie apocalypse, the Rapture, the Ginger Rapture, and who knows what else. All to get his father to beg for help. Say what you will about Blaine, but the man has style.
- Mr. Boss in his day job as a CPA:
Boss: I'm not disputing that Bonnie and Clyde are like family to you.....but the IRS doesn't allow you to claim pit bulls as dependents.
- Ravi, upon being told that a quote is from Gandhi: "I know that. Of course I know that. I'm British. That manky old git cost us the crown jewel of the empire."
- Pam, Liv's cellmate from episode 8, returns, claiming innocence despite breaking into an apartment and being found smoking pot in the shower. She then continually implies Clive is racist for arresting her, despite them both being black.
- Peyton downright eager to have Liv down the brain of the stripper for info.
- Liv on the stripper's brain trying to give an annoyed Peyton a lap dance and complaining about her best friend not finding her attractive.
- Liv storms into Boss' office demanding to know where Drake is. One of Boss' goons closes the blinds to beat on her. The secretary keeps working, indifferent to the sounds of the beating going on. Her reaction when Liv walks out unharmed is priceless.