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troperville

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tools

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toys

• In Call To Power, destroying an enemy lawyer unit with a fusion tank.
  Fusion tank: [Powers up railgun]
  Lawyer: [Brandishing a writ] You're served!
  Fusion tank: [ZAP]
• The infamous "spearman vs. tank" battles that resulted in the icon on Civfanatics - it's a burning tank with a confused Emoticon next to a rejoicing spearman.
• Civ IV features Leonard Nimoy narrating a famous quote each time you research a technology. When you research satellites, he quotes Sputnik: "Beep... beep... beep... beep...."
• Great People-related anachronisms can be quite hilarious. "Li Bo (Great Artist) was born in Tenochtitlan", while already rather weird, wouldn't have looked nearly as insane if Li Bo wasn't wearing a white Elvis suit.
  • "Hernan Cortes (Great General) was born in Tenochtitlan!"
    • J Edgar Hoover, Great Spy, in a ninja suit.
• Ghandi Threatening you with nuclear weapons. I don't care what you say, that's hilarious.
• The names of the achievements in Civ V.
  • If you fail to build enough wonders before the other cultures do (once another culture finishes a wonder, you lose the chance to finish yours), you earn an achievement called "Really?!"
  • A (never implemented) achievement is called "Cat Fight". You get it by being a female leader and declaring war on every other female leader on the map at once.
• The description of the Giant Death Robot in Civilization V:
  The “mech” is a giant bipedal mechanical robot armed with a variety of missiles, Gatling gun arms, laser-beam eyes, and a deadly kung-fu punch. Although not currently found on the modern battlefield, no doubt across the world governments and evil corporations are secretly developing these metal behemoths even as we speak. When these mechs come into service, all of the world’s other weaponry will become obsolete, and humanity’s fate will be decided by a climactic battle between armies of good and evil mechs in the streets of downtown Tokyo. (Assuming that the giant radioactive monsters don’t get us first.)
• Kinda dark, when a humble worthless puny pathetic civilization destroyed in the players superior awesome technologically advanced military for the sake of resource or just for -*ehem- "fun", just want to make you laugh maniacally evil.
• In Civilization II, the Entertainment advisor in the Modern era is an Elvis Impersonator. In ancient times, you instead have... the same Elvis Impersonator, but wearing a toga.
  • And he'll always refer to you as "King", complete with a short pause before the title and striking a very Elvis-like pose as he says it.
  • His reaction to your civilization being in a state of Anarchy:
  • A great moment while playing II was when the foreign adviser told me to seek other cultures and learn what I can from them. And then I should eliminate them. The military adviser then chimed in with an Evil Laugh.
• Loading up a mod that lets you play as Poland and trashing the hell out of the barbarian city of... Aryan.
• In Civilization 5, whenever Montezuma is angry with you.
  • Also from Civ 5, Harald Bluetooth's reaction when you defeat him: after looking absurdly shocked for a second, he takes off his helmet and throws it off his boat as he stomps offscreen, all the while trash-talking in Danish. And you don't hear the helmet hit the water until ''just'' before he leaves.
  • To clarify his speech, he says, "What is this treachery? Loki must have been by your side, for no ordinary could have defeated me."
  • When you first encounter Babylon, you see Nebuchadnezzar sitting on a huge stone throne, in a very creepy, dark palace, and the only light sources are torches lit with creepy green fire as he casually sips wine from a golden chalice—and then he flinches and drops said chalice on the floor as he speaks, as if he ''only noticed you just now.''
• In V, find a city state at total war with a major civ. Gift the city state a lot of highly advanced units, and they may be able to conquer the major civ's cities, keeping the ones with wonders and burning the rest to the ground.