"I'm not here to speculate why California Raisins: the Grape Escape was never released. I'm here to give you the investigative reporting you've come to expect from articles like 'Panda Bears Fucking' and 'Suck This, UNICEF.'"
What happens when you mix a fratboy with a nerd.Sean Riley, better known as Seanbaby, is a Caustic Critic who used to write for Cracked.com and still works for Electronic Gaming Monthly. He is famous for his Web site, seanbaby.com, mostly for his old video game reviews, making fun of the old Super Friends cartoon series, his collection of the Hostess Cupcake/Twinkies ad comics and MSTing all of it. He was also a writer on The Adventures Of Chico And Guapo and wrote the dialogue for the UFC Undisputed video games (earning him a Guinness World Record; see Overly Narrow Superlative) and WWE SmackDown vs. RAW 2011. He's also designing Calculords, a math-based scifi strategy game for the iPhone.
Broke the Rating Scale:He often invents rating systems for his Cracked articles to explain certain aspects of the works he's dealing with. This dates back to EGM, where he refused to rate a certain game with a number and instead gave it a troll riding a hot dog.
Call Back: It's common for him to reference some of his old jokes, and many of them are so subtle that only his most dedicated readers will catch them. For example, one of Dick Whiskey's cop buddies is a guy named Fisketti, who first appeared in Seanbaby's article about the Rainbow Raider. The phrase "A real hot dog" is first noted by Seanbaby in his review for "Mr. T's Be Somebody Or Be Somebody's Fool", and shows up again in a Kick-To-The-Groin comic he made for one Probe article about videogame violence.
Seanbaby: I learned how to throw a tomahawk before I learned how to throw a football, which was ridiculous since if we were involved in a ranged altercation, there weren't enough people in the state of Oregon to soak up my family's ammunition supply. My folks used to turn off the electricity on weekends to prepare us for a life of self-sustained everything. I had so many knives and spears stashed in tree forts that my version of Home Alone would have been rated NC-17, and my parents thought that was rad. I should have made it clear earlier that when I said, "In the country, all your neighbors are insane," I was mostly talking to the people living next to me.
Male Gaze: In one EGM article where he and his girlfriend tried to find the worst products showcased at E3, one involved her wearing a VR headset that blocked her view of the outside world completely. Naturally, this gave Seanbaby an opportunity to take a picture of him staring down her shirt (she was cosplaying as Christie from "Tekken") without her noticing.
Small Name, Big Ego: Not Seanbaby himself, but some interesting characters have come out of the woodwork after finding Seanbaby's articles:
Mike Arkin, who worked on the NES Total Recall (1990) game. Threatened to sue and/or shoot Seanbaby over his review of the game.
Mark Discordia, who wrote to Nintendo Power during the 90s at the age of 32. After Seanbaby mocked the letter, someone claiming to be Mark had several exchanges with Sean, during which "Mark" made escalating boasts of his sex life, salary, and drug use.
Uwe Boll, who challenged Sean to a boxing match after Sean wrote a scathing review of one of his movies. After it was revealed to Boll that Sean practices Muay Thai and was a full head taller than him(whereas the previous reviewers Boll had faced were thin, gangly, and rather short), Boll promptly backed down.
The Rival: He's developed a red-hot hatred toward Gregory J.P. Godek, an author who has written several books that are lists of romantic things to do with your lover (Example, 10,000 Ways to Say I Love You.) He has spent several articles completely eviscerating his books.
Wall of Text: His style of humor can get pretty wordy- he often constructs complex scenarios to set up a punchline. One of his EGM editors once complained to him that his writing was like a house of cards, where removing one sentence makes the whole article fall apart.