Corrupt-a-wish.

Granted. You are eternally trapped in your dream.

---

I wish that 2nd Animal Crossing movie exists right now

Edited by ckha42 on Oct 7th 2021 at 11:42:06 PM

It's a movie about a random stretch of road in the countryside that is occasionally crossed by wild animals.

I wish I could get away crime as long as I am standing on a lawbook, aka above the law.

Granted. You shrink to a millimeter in height.

---

I wish Calvin and Hobbes had an official Hobbes plush tiger and nothing else.

Granted. Now the comic itself doesn't exist; just the plush without any background behind it.

I wish I could decide which ships become canon.

I like cute things. You gotta deal with it.

Granted. You now have the ability to decide what mode of transportation characters will canonically use to get from one place to another.

I wish everyone would stop aging.

Edited by JankyKong on Oct 7th 2021 at 1:00:12 PM

Ever wanted to see the most inexplicably horrifying intro to a game ever?

Granted: you have to (re)read Tuck Everlasting.

I wish my Ozzy pop I wished for earlier stopped playing anything at midnight.

Ozzy Xlinder and I are one and the same.

Granted. It now begins playing music from 00:01 to 23:59 everyday. You also can't switch it off by any means because it's in your brain now. Ta-ta.

I wish we all died, the universe ate itself, and no one could be revived or resurrected. Not sure how to make it worse tbh.

"I just need one of you to come here to give your life to the sun god. It will be for the monkey city's glory."

Granted: the universe resets after 100,000,000,000 years and slowly redevelops until we get to this point, making your wish useless.

I wish I can go as One of the Fathers of Heavy Metal for Halloween.

Ozzy Xlinder and I are one and the same.

Granted. No one recognises the costume.

I wish I would never run into glitches.

I like cute things. You gotta deal with it.

Granted, that's because every game you play is now just simple stuff like Pong

I wish I was capable of shapeshifting.

Just made a server on discord.Come join me.

Granted. You accidentally shapeshift into a nudibranch and end up dying from not being in salt-water.

I wish for more Complete Monsters in the Pokemon franchise.

"Paldea has a lot of different Pokemon from those in Kitakami." - Carmine

Granted. The Pokémon become feral and start attacking humans for real.

I wish I could be a maniac on the dance floor.

I hope you get tiny bits of eggshell in all your omelettes for the rest of your life!

I don't understand your wish but now you have absolutely fantastic dance moves

so good that you breakdance on that dance floor until you somehow break 50% of the bones in your body

huh

---

I wish I could find better festive pfps

"As president of KaibaCorp, I declare your argument as invalid!!!"

Granted: You find better drawn pfps, but they are even worse at saying what they are for.

I wish I had I had a dvd that was just this clip from The Osbournes with no sound.

Edited by LilCutie on Oct 10th 2021 at 12:33:33 PM

Ozzy Xlinder and I are one and the same.

Granted. The DVD is badly scratched and unplayable

I wish EA would put The Sims 2 on Origin

It used to be..only 3 and 4 are available in the store right now, but for the sake of the game...

Granted. Only the base game is made available, with none of the expansion packs.

I wish Sonic could swim.

I hope you get tiny bits of eggshell in all your omelettes for the rest of your life!

Granted but he commits suicide when he realized swimming takes too long.

I wish we all died.

"I just need one of you to come here to give your life to the sun god. It will be for the monkey city's glory."

Granted: female mosquitoes take over.

I wish I can draw humans.

Edited by LilCutie on Oct 11th 2021 at 7:42:28 AM

Ozzy Xlinder and I are one and the same.

Granted, when you try to draw humans, they magically come to life. However, since you suck at drawing humans, their proportions and organs can’t work so they die in horrible pain the moment they are finished.

I wish all genies were made out of glass.

Granted. You get cut to ribbons by the glass

I wish the neighbor's dog would shut up

Granted: now you just have to deal with their cat...

I wish I got that OZZY tat. (Right Fingers)

Ozzy Xlinder and I are one and the same.

Granted. The tattoos on Ozzy's right fingers disappear, so he travels to your location, cuts off your right hand fingers, and surgically attaches them to his hand.

I wish for 69,420 pounds of gold

45 52 52 4f 52 3a 20 49 6e 76 61 6c 69 64 20 73 79 6e 74 61 78 20 65 72 72 6f 72

Granted. You’re crushed when it falls on you.

I wish for the genie’s magic.

Just made a server on discord.Come join me.

Granted. You're blasted in the face with it.

I wish to be the greatest swordsman in the world.

I like cute things. You gotta deal with it.

Granted. Absolutely everyone becomes completely inept at using a sword just to make you better by comparison. This directly leads to swordplay becoming a lost art.

I wish I may, I wish I must, find a princess, before I bust.

Ever wanted to see the most inexplicably horrifying intro to a game ever?