GET THAT PIZZA!

Superjohn, using his demonic speaking skills, is able to convince all other south american countries to invade brazil at the same time. During the chaos Superjohn makes off with the pizza and flies off to Japan.

Edited by Superjohn on Sep 16th 2020 at 6:25:30 AM

O5-9 wanting the Pizza but hating Japan thinks it's not worth going there for Pizza, but then remembered SCP 458, and used it to take the Pizza, surely nobody going to go on about him using the same method twice

He then discovers that the SCP Foundation is once again run by Nine-Tailed Cat's clones, who take him and the pizza into custody. Awe then promptly abuses respawn mechanics to get into the vault and take the pizza, only to get eaten by Superjohn's sandworm, which then gets confiscated by Foreman again, who ends up spaced by Guma, and so on... Foreman has created a time loop!

After a couple more repeats of the cycle, Nine-Tailed Cat gets sick of it, grabs the pizza, and flees through a portal into a universe that's exactly the same except without the SCP Foundation or any SCPs.

Superjohn snaps cats neck, then picks up the pizza to eat when he gets decapitated by...

Florien and Florian wait outside Superjohn's door. There's a brief argument.

So I'm going to introduce myself as James Ire...

NO. We're doing my plan this time.

but...

NO.

After that well reasoned debate, Florien gives in to Florian's plan. They steal one of those scythed chariots from a museum and ride by Superjohn at high speed, decapitating him with one of the scythes. Florien leans over and reaches out and grabs the Pizza, but that tips the Chariot and spills Florien, Florian, and the Pizza right into the path of...

Guma, who teleports in front of them and kicks Florien’s face into Florian’s face, crushing both of their skulls. The pizza is ripe for taking.

Knife pops up right behind Guma, asking why he had to be so brutal about the whole thing. She then stabs his face about 27 times until he falls over, dead.

She takes pity on Florien and Florian. Before she runs off with the pizza, she puts her hands on their foreheads, sending a wave of healing light into them. She takes out a piece of paper, saying "u owe me a favor." She then summons her angelic motorbike and speeds off into the distance.

Favor? Owed? Florien and Florian immediately repay it. Debts are not for having when you aren't a country, after all. They do Knife the favor of saving her life by taking the Pizza from her in a high speed chase. Now Knife won't be murdered by the next person. However, Florien and Florian now have targets on their backs. Wasn't that generous of them, to fall on that particular metaphorical grenade?

Nine-Tailed Cat gets his neck injury healed by some friendly priests. The priests then chant "Wololo" at Florien and Florian until the two are converted to his side, and he orders them to give him the pizza.

Foreman and his O5 council sit there in awe at how Ninetales can use the cloning machine after they patch that out of the universe, they immediately work on patching for good this time

"Meanwhile in the Dimension we're currently in"

The Foreman of this dimensions is a harden assassin with a metal claw and foot, he smells THAT PIZZA and think "I must have THAT PIZZA!" so he pursue Forien and Forian and slashes them with his metal claw and take THAT PIZZA! but then that Timeline was aborted

"Meanwhile in the real time"

Foreman claws at Ninetales instead

Godddam Ninjas

Edited by Foreman on Sep 17th 2020 at 8:29:59 AM

The priest, unfortunately for cat, didn't have enough holy power to stop Superjohn from killing Cat and foreman,and taking the pizza with him on a cruise ship.

Edited by Superjohn on Sep 17th 2020 at 7:24:12 AM

The priest may not have had enough holy power, but Knife sure as hell did. She lands on the cruise ship, and does a stylish front flip before vertically bisecting Superjohn with divine energy. A purple "STYLIN" flashes above her, and she shrugs. She then picks up the pizza.

She decides that if she's gonna be on this cruise ship, might as well have fun. She makes her way to the main hall of the ship.

"Uh, kid? That was mine- and I can't find them. This cruise ship's so fucking crowded."

Edited by MadameButterflyKnife on Sep 17th 2020 at 8:39:53 AM

That's when Tory grabs the pizza and steals it. But at last, all good things come to an end, because...

Haha just kidding it was all an illusion for metal claw Foreman to swipe the Pizza, seriously a commie that's holy? What's next an atheist who's an creationist? And here comes the Ninjas

Okay I'm leaving because there's to many ninjas

Just kidding I take the PIZZA while no one was looking

Edited by Foreman on Sep 17th 2020 at 8:37:20 AM

Over the PA, a broadcast is made.

All passengers report to your assigned lounge for an important announcement. Attendance is mandatory. Also, after that, trivia night. Oh, also...

there is a pause, and a little feedback, annoying everyone on the ship.

This is a robbery, passengers. Turn over the Pizza, and we'll go.

Yes, that.

Florien and Florian, having hijacked the cruise ship, convince the passengers to gang up on Foreman. The passengers toss Foreman overboard, and Florien and Florian get the Pizza from the terrified passengers. They then get in their (much smaller) stolen coast guard boat and sail for the Geothermal Power plant in Iceland, so as to warm the Pizza with the power of the VERY PLANET ITSELF!

Upon arrival, they run into Nine-Tailed Cat, who uses their matching avatars to create a Spot the Imposter situation. Florian picks the wrong one and ends up shooting the real Florien, after which Nine-Tailed Cat backstabs them to take the pizza himself.

Some where else a ai colony finally managed long ranged teleportation and simply snatch the pizza from his hands in the process also teleporting...

Knife, who ends up landing in the middle of the colony. She asks the people living in the colony why they allow an AI to run their lives, and one of them admits it is out of fear.

Knife decides that is unacceptable. She decides that she is going to liberate these people from the tyranny of this artifical intelligence. She leads them in a fight against the AI's forces, and eventually comes out victorious after a long battle. She and the newly liberated colony celebrate with the pizza. However...

Superjohn, disguised as one of the citizens, blows her head off and takes the pizza, traveling back to Earth landing next to a farm owned by...

Florian (with a black eye from being punched by Florien) and Florien (with a limp from being shot in the leg by Florian). Florien and Florien ride a combine harvester over Superjohn. Florien dives out and grabs the Pizza. Florien and Florian then embezzle the farming subsidies granted by the government to pay for a one way ticket to Morocco to hide in the Sahara with the Pizza.

Wm, now dressed as Ninetails dressed as Florien (just to add more headache), shows up at the Moroccan airport security checkpoint with a visually-identical-to-the-real-deal-but-not-nearly-as-appetizing fake pizza, claiming to be the real Florien. The Florie/ans, of course, are not fooled, but the guard is, which leads to spot the imposter shenanigans and "whose baggage is it anyway?!" mayhem.

In the chaos, Wm swaps the pizzas and ditches the convoluted disguise, dressing instead as a poacher.

He's promptly caught by the ranger Nine-Tailed Cat, who demands to see his pizza-hunting license. Since poacher-Wm has none, Nine-Tailed Cat arrests him on the spot and has the pizza confiscated.

"Oh! I haven't actually had a chance to play that one yet, but it sounds exciting. I look forward to-" *THUD*

Edited by NineTailedCat on Sep 19th 2020 at 6:58:01 AM

Then, in the middle of the forest Florien and Florian appear. Florian distracts Ranger Nine Tailed Cat with a question.

Hey what do you think of Queen's wish relative to the other spiderweb games?

distracted by that totally unexpected question, Nine Tailed Cat doesn't see Florien sneaking up with a syringe. Nine Tailed Cat, poisoned with syringe juice, drops the Pizza, while Florien and Florian get away with it. However, then...

Superjohn runs them over with a monster truck. Then he runs them over again.and again. And Again. And Again. And Again. You think johns bitter about something?

Superjohn picks up the pizza and rides off on his monster truck when...

A rain of arrows hit the ground, destroying Superjohn's monster truck just as Melecie was about to create a giant crystal to destroy the truck. "That took long enough, like almost two weeks since I fired it to the sky. Also, can't forget me now, hm?"

Melecie takes the pizza and uses the Mystia to create a rather... mysterious army of knights, mages, and pegasus warriors protecting him.

since I haven't properly introduced it yet, the Mystia can produce holographic-looking but very real objects just from the caster's memory. which is just me because the mystia is soulbound and can't be used by others. these objects, also known as Memories, basically follows the caster's will and has the original's abilities... except slightly weaker