WarMart! (Sort of a spiritual successor to Mall Fight)

Double unfortunate, since I end up arriving at the office as well, ready to bash some heads in.

I grab some cardboard boxes and cut one of the sides off of one.

I give Hyper Real a shove, causing them to "accidentally" step on the Legos.

I unconventionally use earbuds as garrote on Tales Of Under. They're surprisingly durable.

I SLAM DUNK Sieg into a cardboard box.

I unleash a barrage of long-expired prunes using a high-tech biological weapon known as my hands.

I come out of the cardboard box with Bowie Knives.

Well, Custard got me; not before I throw Lucille at them, though.

I subsequently respawn next to a massive pile of gas cans, empty glass bottles, and cloth. Molotovs galore, motherfuckers!

I use a fork to penetrate the gas cans, causing them to explode, but scattering my body all over War Mart.

...never mind.

I respawn next to a shopping cart. Nothing else. I promptly decide to use it as a weapon like Saejima and Kiryu from Yakuza do with similarly sized weapons. I end up crushing myself under the unexpected weight of the cart.

Edited by hanwen1234 on Dec 20th 2018 at 11:51:14 PM

I take some cables and set some traps.

I whack Hyper in the face with a calendar.

I ride in the carriage of a shopping cart, throwing expired prunes and bottles of sour milk right and left. I then end up crashing into a shelf full of unidentified heavy boxes because I forgot to steer.

I respawn next to the 'still' burning embers of my attempt at molotov hell. I just have a heart attack and just die on the spot.

I load three heavy boxes into the cart, with the intention of gaining extra force and velocity from the cart. I push the cart ,lean on the handle and that bar thing near the wheels, and head off towards the Produce aisle.

Edited by casioonaplasticbeach on Feb 13th 2019 at 7:03:23 AM

I accidentally put grease all over the floor. Whoops!

I jump off of my cart, slow my self down, and let my cart collide into a glass freezer door. Now there's grease and Hungry-Man meals all over the floor, like a marriage made in obesity.

I grab a blowtorch and light the grease, causing everyone in the radius to burn to death.

I respawn in the back of the deli section. I swipe the nearest fire extinguisher, spray some in zorua´s face, and throw it into the fire, hoping for it to explode and take the fire with it. In the meantime, I dash for the Sports section.

Edited by casioonaplasticbeach on Feb 13th 2019 at 8:46:18 AM

I grab duct tape and some bolongna, and head to unfortunatezorua.

I attack Playing with a sword made of Flex Seal and Kid Cuisine.

“TASTE MY MACARONI-FUELED DEATH!”

While Tales is bashing Playing to death with the cheesiest avatar cutter I’ve seen, I take a golf club, a golf ball, and some super glue. After combining, I bash Tales in the head multiple times.

Edited by casioonaplasticbeach on Feb 14th 2019 at 8:32:20 AM

I am dead. I respawn in the toy aisle, grab a pogo stick, and bounce over to where my corpse was.

BASEBALL BATS AND NAILS EVERYWHERE.

"Is this even Walmart anymore?"

Either way, I don't have the safety equipment to craft any maces just yet, so I quickly leave in with a regular bat.

bump