Tear Jerker / The Case Study of Vanitas

Per wiki policy, Spoilers Off applies here and all spoilers are unmarked. You Have Been Warned.

This is a Mochizuki Jun work, so better get the tissues ready:

• Louis' death. It traumatized both Noé and Dominique, and left the former with Survivor Guilt because he was appalled at the relief he felt when he realized that it was not his head that had been cut off.

Gévaudan Arc

• Chloe’s past: As a child, she was turned into a vampire in the wake of the Babel incident. Her human family faked her death and hid her away as they researched a way to turn her human, but passed away before they could succeed. And so, for the better part of 300 years, Chloé was cloistered to the point that she feared going outside.
  • August’s betrayal. He had been nothing but a friend to Chloé over the years, but after his students’ deaths and the betrayal of Jeanne’s parents he changed completely. He came to Chloé, demanding her family’s research. When she refused, he attacked and tried to compel her. While Chloé was able to fight him off, she lost her oldest friend.
  • When the Beast of Gévaudan attacks started, Chloé worried for her family’s people. One day, Chloé happened to witness one of the vampire huntS that had been disguised as wolf attacks. Chloé told her human family what happened and the current head promised to look into it. Unfortunately, this drew suspicion and her family was slaughtered. The only survivor blamed Chloé. Chloé fled with Jean-Jacques, but was scapegoated for the murders. Jean-Jacques, her last companion, willingly became a curse-bearer to protect her and nearly died at his father’s hands. When Jeanne came to kill her, Chloé was a mess of grief and despair.
• The revelation that Chloe, despite her dedication to creating the World Alteration Device, never really wanted to be human. She only wanted was to be loved for who and what she is. Contrary to what her father wished, she just wanted them to accept her even if she was no longer a human.
• Vanitas's You Wouldn't Believe Me If I Told You outburst at Noé. Just shows how deeply wounded he is beneath that mask of arrogance and superiority. His horrible past and the vampires' numerous attempts at killing him have left him so untrusting and jaded that he has just lost the hope that any vampire would be willing to listen, let alone believe in what he has to say.
• Astolfo's past is both horrifying and heart-wrenching. He was a sweet kid who once helped an injured vampire who was trying to escape from the church. Said vampire betrayed him by turning him and his family to the vampires. His parents were brutally murdered and they sucked his and his sister's blood for days. By the time Roland came to the rescue, his little sister was already dead. He may be an Ax-Crazy Blood Knight hellbent on killing all the vampires,, but it's hard to blame him considering all the shit he's been through. What makes this whole thing worse is that deep down, he blames himself for the death of his family because he was naive enough to be deceived in the first place.
• Astolfo’s breakdown at the end of the arc. He is wounded, disarmed, physically and mentally exhausted, but is so determined to get revenge he tries to keep going. He only stops when Roland, who’d stopped the nightmare of his family’s murder, arrives.
• Vanitas' complete and utter disbelief at the mere thought that Jeanne could actually have feelings for him is equal parts funny and this. His self-hatred runs so deep that he is convinced that no one could ever actually love him. This exchange between Vanitas and Roland says it all:
  Vanitas (in disbelief, after Roland's revelation that Jeanne likes him): That's not even... remotely possible...
  Roland: Why not?
  Vanitas: Why not...? Because that's why I approached her. Because I thought... she'd never like me.
  Roland: ... Why?
  Vanitas (shouting): Because! It's revolting!.... As if anyone could fall for... a person like me...

• Chapter 48 elaborates on Vanitas and Mikhail's time when they were under the clutches of Doctor Morreau as his guinea pigs, and god it's NOT PRETTY AT ALL. The two of them were subjected from one painful experiment to another, especially Vanitas, who offered himself up for the most painful experiments in order to protect Mikhail.

• Young!Vanitas's breakdown in chapter 49, where he blames himself for his parents' death. Considering how manipulative, inaccessible (except some moments where he lets his guard down) and unpredictable current Vanitas has been up until now, not only is it shocking, but also really, really heartbreaking to see the young Vanitas break down the way he does.
  • And the reason he stayed captive under Morreau for as long as he did, even though he could have easily escaped if he wanted to? To prevent anyone else from suffering in his place.
  • The panels with their 'father' and them goofing around. They're heartwarming, and at the same time quite poignant, as the readers are already aware of the tragedy that awaits the trio.
  • The ending panels of the chapter; Mikhail is ready to give up his humanity to be with Vanitas of the Blue Moon, while Vanitas vows that he wants to retain his humanity until the end. Well, we all know that the next chapter is not gonna be pretty.
  • The fact that Mikhail was willing to become their "father's" kin, just so they could be together shows how much the poor kid loved his "father". It's particularly gut-wrenching when you think about what's next to come.
  • This chapter also provides some really sad context to Vanitas's self-loathing. He blamed himself for his mother's death, as she died due to childbirth, then his father died protecting him... there's also his willingness to stay in the lab, enduring one horrific experiment after another so that nobody else would be hurt, which (sort of) implies that he didn't care much about his own well-being at this point. When he finally meets a savior (Vanitas of the Blue Moon), he ends up having to kill said savior for reasons unknown. No wonder his self-hatred runs so deep.
• Memoire 55.5: Vanitas saying that if he's going to die, then he wants Noe to be the one who does it. The defeated and tired look on his face as he says that makes the scene even more poignant.
  • It gets even sadder when you remember that this is the second time a friend of Noe wants him to be the one to kill them. To Noe, history is repeating itself, and considering what we're told at the story's beginning, it may continue to do so.
• Memoire 59 goes into more detail about Astolfo's past not long after he joined the chasseurs. Astolfo is so consumed by guilt, self-loathing, and a hatred for vampires that he can't fathom the idea of vampires being anything except pure evil. During a mission, he and the chasseurs attempt to foil what they believe is a human trafficking ring that vampires are carrying out. When Astolfo finds a group of human children with a vampire among them, he tries to kill the vampire but the humans stand up for him. Astolfo can't fathom why the kids would want anything to do with a vampire because his own experience colored his view on vampires. Appalled by their willingness to defend a vampire, Astolfo goes apeshit and massacres them all. Roland and Olivier are understandably horrified, to the point where Roland punches and berates Astolfo for letting his hatred get the better of him. This is the incident that changed Astolfo's view of Roland, because Astolfo believes that even humans who sympathize with vampires deserve to be killed whereas Roland doesn't. Astolfo has a breakdown over it, believing that vampires and human sympathizers deserve no forgiveness because that would be akin to forgiving himself. Roland is so heartbroken by how deep Astolfo's self-hatred goes that he realizes nothing he does will be able to help him.
• Memoire 61 begins with a flashback showing a young Dante being abandoned by what seems to be his mother. His mother tells him to wait for her like a good boy, and the later panels show him waiting and waiting until it hits him that his mother is never coming back for him and crying from the realization.

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